'cause the bad's been slowly getting worse
and this fast lane living, it's a curse
While Nate might be perfectly comfortable anywhere, the normal aches and pains of his body numb to him, there is something extra gratifying about holding Sunjata right now, about being close to him while he eats. It's normal, it feels normal, even if everything else is so far away from normal that it's difficult to parse. If he still drew breath, he would feel the thick lump of worry, of panic, stuck in his throat and threatening to choke him. If he still drew breath, he would be having a much harder time clinging to his cloak of calm.
Silence grows while the attuned eats, Nate's head shifting so his ear is pressed against his fiance's chest, the unsteady thump of his heart a reminder. Still beating, still kicking, even if it struggles, stumbles. By the time Sunjata is finished, the blue eye staring up at him is a touch distant, Nate starting once steel eyes look down at him, and trying to force a smile to his lips. It's more successful than his jokes at least, though that's not saying much.
"Sounds good to me, darling." The movement might be slow, but it's deliberate. Nate rises, his arms still wrapped around the other man, pulling them both up at the same time and letting the taller man lean against him, lean into his support however is needed. The only draw the bath has over the shower is being on the ground floor, the obstacle of stairs able to be pushed off for a little bit longer, as they slowly move through the house to the bathroom.
Care and tenderness the likes of which he will never be able to put words to drip off Nate's hands, off every little touch to make things easier. Getting the attuned into the tub, easing him out of pants that Nate isn't sure he's seen before, getting the water running, not too hot, not too cold. While the tub fills, Nate leans in, pressing his forehead against his beloved's, cupping his face in reverent hands and looking, searching for something in unfocused eyes. There's no indication of whether Nate finds it or not, but it doesn't stop him from leaning in, pressing an endlessly tender kiss to Sunjata's lips.
Silence grows while the attuned eats, Nate's head shifting so his ear is pressed against his fiance's chest, the unsteady thump of his heart a reminder. Still beating, still kicking, even if it struggles, stumbles. By the time Sunjata is finished, the blue eye staring up at him is a touch distant, Nate starting once steel eyes look down at him, and trying to force a smile to his lips. It's more successful than his jokes at least, though that's not saying much.
"Sounds good to me, darling." The movement might be slow, but it's deliberate. Nate rises, his arms still wrapped around the other man, pulling them both up at the same time and letting the taller man lean against him, lean into his support however is needed. The only draw the bath has over the shower is being on the ground floor, the obstacle of stairs able to be pushed off for a little bit longer, as they slowly move through the house to the bathroom.
Care and tenderness the likes of which he will never be able to put words to drip off Nate's hands, off every little touch to make things easier. Getting the attuned into the tub, easing him out of pants that Nate isn't sure he's seen before, getting the water running, not too hot, not too cold. While the tub fills, Nate leans in, pressing his forehead against his beloved's, cupping his face in reverent hands and looking, searching for something in unfocused eyes. There's no indication of whether Nate finds it or not, but it doesn't stop him from leaning in, pressing an endlessly tender kiss to Sunjata's lips.
better tell me what's your life worth
i think it's time for a change, 'cause the drugs don't work
