From being an Abandoned who had rarely left the Hollowed Grounds, to embracing the call of adventure, to dying and being reborn first as an Ascended and then as an Ancient, Maea has gone through quite the amount of changes in her life. One thing remains common, though, in her attempts to find out just where she belongs; she’s always had a craving for knowledge which has brought her to so many places and to meet so many people here in Caido. We can’t wait to see what else is in store for her!
Congratulations, Maea!
Credits
Court of the Fallen was created in October of 2018 by Odd, Honey, and Crooked.
Skinning and hosting by the epically talented Kaons, and functionality fanciness by the coding magic of Neowulf. If you ever see either of them around, make sure to show them some love!
But he could just stay here, couldn't he? Would it be any different from when he was sick and Ronin kept him in a dreamworld? Only this way he'd be with their son, and Ronin could visit them every night and together they could build a life—and a world—entirely as they pleased.
Remi can't help the brief flicker of smugness to hear the places Ronin's own way of speaking changes the sounds, but gods if he doesn't love it just as much coming from the Star's lips. "Yeah?" He wonders almost self-consciously, feeling that the naming of this child made it all the more real.
"What say you, then?" Remi asks to the infant in his arms. Mateo, who of course has absolutely no idea what he's being asked, does absolutely nothing. "Oh I see. Playing it close to your chest, just like your father, mm?" Smiling knowingly, Remi leans against Ronin. "Shall we bring him back to bed with us?"
who's got their claws in you my friend?
into your heart i'll b e a t again
Coding base by Sky!
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
Remi could stay, and it would be perfect, until his body wasted away in a bed and his life and his dreams winked out all at once. Ronin is holding all of those screaming thoughts at bay, though, even if there’s a ball of anxiety that starts to form as he gazes down at this life that’s appeared. Now it’s the Star’s turn to wonder - is this real? Or is this just a shared delusion born of their conversation and their love? Can it even be real, if it’s a dream? The two are entirely at odds.
Blinking away the stupor as the alchemist speaks again, Ronin smiles softly and reaches out to brush a gentle finger across the sleeping boy’s cheek. ”I am sure he will have something to say about it eventually, if he’s anything like his other father,” he murmurs, nodding at the suggestion and ushering them out of the room. ”Let’s go,” he says, nuzzling against his curls and leading them back down the hall.
Not one necessarily to give into willful ignorance, but oh if Remi hasn't jumped right into the deep end with this one.
"Who me?" Remi wonders with a chuckle, shaking his head. Once upon a time the alchemist might have been described as shy and reserved. Now those traits seem laughable, and the look Remi gives the Star suggests that said father might have things to say about it now, even if their son doesn't.
Holding the child with infinite care, Remi trails after Ronin down the hall, passing by the familiar and the unfamiliar into they're back in their bedroom. Still, Remi doesn't really take note of the antlers on the wall, far too absorbed by the tiny life cradled against his chest. As he softly gets into bed, Mateo stirs, tiny fingers balled into fists as he tries on another wail to see if it might get him what he wants. Only, as he's a newborn, he's absolutely no idea what that might be. Rolling his tongue softly as if purring at the child, Remi beams up at Ronin as he carefully lays the boy down between them.
I don't want to wake up, Remi thinks to himself, though the thought flutters through the attuned bond even as the alchemist props his cheek up on one arm that he might continue to gaze down on their son.
who's got their claws in you my friend?
into your heart i'll b e a t again
Coding base by Sky!
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
”Yes, you.” Ronin smirks, though his preoccupation doesn’t seem to have left him entirely. In fact, the harder Remi falls, the more the Star seems to want to pull away. And as his husband settles on the bed with Mateo, Ronin merely perches on the edge of it, trying to ignore the way he wants to melt each and every time their son moves or makes a sound. How they are going to feed him should be a logistical issue, but here in dreamland he imagines it is easily solved.
With a soft sigh, Remi’s murmured remark filters through to him. The Star offers an apologetic smile. ”I know you don’t,” he says sadly, with the ragged sort of acceptance of one who knows the Lullaby as well as he knows himself - especially his stubbornness, his mania, his one track mind when it comes to the things he wants and needs. ”You can stay. I’ll take care of you as best I can.”
As if entirely fixated on their son, Remi hardly notices that Ronin hasn't sat down. His breath catches in his throat every time Mateo stirs, his eyes roaming over the boy's perfectly sweet face, hungry to memorize it all in an instant.
He should be more aware of the tone of Ronin's voice, but the pure bliss he feels has filled his ears with cotton such that for a few moments, the Star's voice is beautiful noise. But when Remi does realize what Ronin has said and importantly, the implications of it, his entire body stills and grows cold. Through furrowed brows and a mess of curls, the alchemist glances to the huntsman, silent but for the pounding of his heart. It would be like the sickness all over again, though worse, because it would be selfishness that kept him away from the Star. It makes the alchemist nauseous, how quickly he's willing to break a promise of never leaving Ronin like that again, so soon after having made it.
"Was this a mistake?" The words are whispered as if trying to keep Mateo from hearing them. What have they done, in creating this life, dreamed though it might be? What would it say about them, to just up and leave their child here? What would it say if they didn't?
who's got their claws in you my friend?
into your heart i'll b e a t again
Coding base by Sky!
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
Ronin has already risen to his feet, his fingers raking through his hair as he takes a long, deep breath, as if it might clear his soul. ”I don’t know,” he whispers honestly, not daring to look back at Remi because it means he might look at Mateo, and if he does that then he might pick him up and refuse to leave. The worst part is that he’s not even doing it for the child - he’s doing it for Remi.
”I’m sorry.” He doesn’t exactly know what for, only that he is, and he feels it deeply and keenly in his bones. ”Stay,” he says again, wiping at his eyes and turning back to the other man at last. ”Make sure he’s safe. I’ll come back, when I’m able to. We’ll figure this all out, Remi. Okay?”
As Ronin stands feathers flourish throughout Remi's curls, his eyes growing wide as his head immediately begins to shake back and forth. He can't move too quickly for fear of knocking the child, but already this sweet and wonderful miracle is darkening all around them and gods if Remi won't fight until his last breath to prevent it. "Hey, come back." Stretching out his hand for the Star, fingers reaching for the man to whom he's pledged his life, the alchemist gives his head another shake.
"A caretaker. But you'll need to help me with creating it...the ones I had growing up were...poor examples." Heart pounding with adrenaline and tight with desperation, Remi tries on as bright a smile as he can manage. However real their son seems to be—or is—Ronin is somehow more real.
Right?
"I can't be without you again." But still there's a worry in his voice. That they won't be right about a caretaker. That things will go horribly wrong. That already they're abandoning their son. "Please." Remi adds, voice heavy with desperation, for though neither of them know how to navigate this strange set of circumstances, the Lullaby knows he can't do it alone.
who's got their claws in you my friend?
into your heart i'll b e a t again
Coding base by Sky!
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
Ronin hates himself for the way everything about him relaxes as Remi decides not to leave him again. He hates the way he wants to cry with relief, the way he wants to apologise to this dream child who hasn’t asked to be made up and pulled into the world. So when the alchemist asks him to return, there’s not a single part of him that thinks of denying him; he sinks back onto the bed (careful of Mateo) to take Remi’s hand, pressing his lips to the back of it in a kiss.
”Okay. A caretaker, then. A dream guard sounds better though.” He manages a weak smile, glancing to their son and preferring to imagine that he’s protected by something, rather than just taken care of, like a janitor in the house. ”You know exactly the right person for the job,” he objects, giving Remi’s fingers a gentle squeeze.
And for a moment she flickers into existence, a woman with golden hair and pebble blue eyes and the horn of a unicorn. ”I didn’t know her as well as you did. But I’ll help as much as I can. She was always good with Aoife.”
With all Remi has put his husband through, he'd not blame him had he not returned. This entire world and Aoife's place in it previously...it was a lot. Though the alchemist has had time to get used to it, to mould it precisely to what he wants and needs, he's not given his husband the same time. But as Ronin returns Remi is reminded of just why it is he is so unfathomably in love with this man, and it squeezes all the air from his lungs in a gentle whooosh of relief.
Tilting his head slightly to the side, confused by this and immediately trying to think of who the obvious candidate would be, Remi's breath is stolen again by the face of a friend he has missed so very dearly. A friend who died, and then died again to make him what he is today.
"Isla." Remi whispers, tears sparkling anew in his eyes as he beams up at the medic. "I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that I wasn't your first choice." She says with a laugh, becoming all the more real for the life the alchemist's memories bleed into her. Squeezing Ronin's hand and nearly bursting with joy at the perfection of it, he sobs out a happy laugh, before moving slightly in the bed that Isla might see the child hidden in the sheets.
'We have a son."
who's got their claws in you my friend?
into your heart i'll b e a t again
Coding base by Sky!
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
Ronin doesn’t need to look at Isla - he’s more interested in Remi’s expression anyway, and to see him so happy and relieved is everything for the Star. He kisses the back of his husband’s hand again, tearing his gaze away so he can look at Mateo, as if giving himself permission again to feel anything for the boy. And in only a moment the starlight is back, Ronin shifting closer so he can rest his head on Remi’s shoulder, letting himself feel, momentarily, the mental exhaustion that racks his soul.
The medic, meanwhile, is beaming down at the infant, moving to crouch down beside the bed to reach out and let the boy take her little finger in his tiny fist. ”You do have a son,” she whispers to him, bubbling with excitement. ”Congratulations, both of you. Believe me when I say that, apart from you two, there’s no safer place. I’ll make sure to give you a detailed report of everything he gets up to.”
"Hopefully there's nothing to detail." Remi's laugh is shaky with relief, Ronin having conjured precisely the perfect caretaker. Created from memory though she might be, the alchemist's heart is entirely undone. Isla holds a special place in his heart, once having been tethered to his very soul, and the sight of her now makes him feel a wild grove of emotions that he can't even begin to parse.
"Thank you." He whispers as if she were here of her own volition. As if she were here at all.
Turning back to the Star, the Lullaby offers his husband a shaky smile, broken with life and joy. "Wake us up." Remi softly says. "When you're ready."
who's got their claws in you my friend?
into your heart i'll b e a t again
Coding base by Sky!
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
”That would be boring. I hope to give you details of all the good and interesting stuff,” Isla says, grinning down at the infant as he stirs a little more. Not wanting him to awaken just to see them go, Ronin nods to his husband and shifts to slip his arms around him, pulling him back against his chest. ”We’ll be back soon,” he assures him, burying his nose in his curls and letting them sit, for just a couple of minutes more, watching their son.
”Goodnight, Mateo,” he whispers eventually. And with a gentle shine of starlight, the two fathers are carefully peeled away from their subconscious, led towards the waking world with all the love and sweetness that Ronin can muster. They leave together and they’ll return together, and all will be well.
