Arialla considered Anden's question for a moment, her face a sympathetic frown. "The truth is, I'm still figuring that out myself. I ... At first I wanted to fight the Voice, to stop her from bringing more people here, or just ... to make her suffer as she'd made me suffer. Though, her being a goddess -- well, I at least wanted to inconvenience her, to make her regret bringing me here. Now ... I try to focus more on living my own life, on getting used to being here, but it still hurts. I still hate her, for bringing me here and for ... other things."
She was thinking of Samuel's fate, his near-death when he'd rejected the Voice, and the way the Voice held the Ascended's souls in an iron grip.
Another pause; Arialla bit her lip as she tried to decide what to say to this man. What had she needed to hear, back when she'd first arrived in Caido? "If you want to fight the Voice, Safrin told me that Ludo is the herald to speak to. But -- I don't know if it's a good idea to get mixed up in a gods' war immediately on arrival."
(If she'd realized Anden was Ascended, she would have cautioned him even further, with Sam's experience in mind to illustrate the fate of Ascended who rejected the Voice. But at the moment, she had no idea.)
"I know you're hurting right now," she added. "And I wish I could say that will go away, but ... I don't know that you ever get used to just being ripped from your home and family like this. It fades, somewhat, as you distract yourself with other things. But there are still times ... It's really hard to accept that we can't go home. There are times when I still think that if I just find the right book, the right ritual, the right spell ... But I can't spend my entire life chasing that dream."
She shook her head, then tried to refocus on Anden's original question: What should he do? "My advice would be to leave the gods go for a little while and try to get your footing in the mortal world. Explore Caido, figure out where you want to live, what you want to do. I'm still working on that, too."
please don't take my sunshine away
