Caiside lifted a hand to cover his mouth as Jigano tried to comfort him. It was wonderful that other people had found solace here, but he wasn’t other people. ”My world was not perfect,” the words came out slightly muffled, and thick with emotion, but Caisides voice didn’t waver, ”and maybe... it is not a place I would go back to, if I were whole, but I... I lost so much.” There was no way he could begin to explain how incomplete he felt here, not without the other man stepping into his shoes.
Under the table, Caisides leg bounced quickly, his emotions manifesting in an anxious energy. He couldn’t let himself crack, not like this. It wasn’t who he was, and it wasn’t fair to subject the other man to his turmoil, when he had surely already gone through his own. Sighing, Caiside straightened up and dropped his hand to grab at his mug again, bringing it to his lips. He didn’t even taste the tea this time, the action more of a stall until he could get his mind in check again. With some obvious struggle, his face cleared, and he stopped his nervous fidgeting, looking up to meet the blue eyed gaze of his companion again.
“You don’t need to apologize to me. This is not your doing, and your kindness is already more than I could ask of anyone. The kind words fell easily from his lips. It was so much easier to focus on others than on himself, especially right now. There was still a tremble in his lips that threatened to take over if he stopped speaking though, so he continued, slowly, each word carefully chosen. ”I suppose, if I am going to be here for... for some time, I could... assist in your efforts. Perhaps more answers lie beyond this barrier.” Perhaps there was a way home through the barrier.
With some effort, he forced a smile back on his face, and tried to bring a positive chirp back to his voice. ”I wanted to see the library anyway. It’s a treat I didn’t expect in a place like this.”
Under the table, Caisides leg bounced quickly, his emotions manifesting in an anxious energy. He couldn’t let himself crack, not like this. It wasn’t who he was, and it wasn’t fair to subject the other man to his turmoil, when he had surely already gone through his own. Sighing, Caiside straightened up and dropped his hand to grab at his mug again, bringing it to his lips. He didn’t even taste the tea this time, the action more of a stall until he could get his mind in check again. With some obvious struggle, his face cleared, and he stopped his nervous fidgeting, looking up to meet the blue eyed gaze of his companion again.
“You don’t need to apologize to me. This is not your doing, and your kindness is already more than I could ask of anyone. The kind words fell easily from his lips. It was so much easier to focus on others than on himself, especially right now. There was still a tremble in his lips that threatened to take over if he stopped speaking though, so he continued, slowly, each word carefully chosen. ”I suppose, if I am going to be here for... for some time, I could... assist in your efforts. Perhaps more answers lie beyond this barrier.” Perhaps there was a way home through the barrier.
With some effort, he forced a smile back on his face, and tried to bring a positive chirp back to his voice. ”I wanted to see the library anyway. It’s a treat I didn’t expect in a place like this.”
