you drew memories in my mind I could never erase
painted colors in my heart I could never replace
She listens solemnly, sucking her lower lip between her teeth and nodding slowly as he explains. "I don't want to be a soldier," Amalia clarifies softly, still rubbing softly at her wrist. "But we are, aren't we? And I... I've been throwing myself at danger, trying to be a better Shield, but it isn't enough. Someone still gets hurt."
Dark eyes cast over the plaza, where business has by and large resumed. For a moment Amalia is quiet, watching the merchants go about their work, the children play, the people pass and talk and smile and simply live. "My life used to be so small. I miss it sometimes. I went to the market and traded and smiled and thought that the world was made up of all those little moments, while bigger things happened beyond where I could see. People ate my food and it made them happy, and that made me happy. But now...?"
A heavy sigh; she shakes her head, looking away from the crowd. "I don't remember the last time I cooked for someone. The big things aren't beyond us - we're part of them, and it's terrifying and incredible and everything I ever wanted and was ever afraid of, all at once. And I'm not saying I'm not grateful, and I wouldn't choose this every time if I had to do it again, but..."
She trails off, shrugging, her dark eyes earnest as she looks up at Ronin and seeks understanding. "I guess what I'm trying to say is I'm already on a path I can't turn back from. And maybe it's not what I thought my life would be. But it's what it is."
Dark eyes cast over the plaza, where business has by and large resumed. For a moment Amalia is quiet, watching the merchants go about their work, the children play, the people pass and talk and smile and simply live. "My life used to be so small. I miss it sometimes. I went to the market and traded and smiled and thought that the world was made up of all those little moments, while bigger things happened beyond where I could see. People ate my food and it made them happy, and that made me happy. But now...?"
A heavy sigh; she shakes her head, looking away from the crowd. "I don't remember the last time I cooked for someone. The big things aren't beyond us - we're part of them, and it's terrifying and incredible and everything I ever wanted and was ever afraid of, all at once. And I'm not saying I'm not grateful, and I wouldn't choose this every time if I had to do it again, but..."
She trails off, shrugging, her dark eyes earnest as she looks up at Ronin and seeks understanding. "I guess what I'm trying to say is I'm already on a path I can't turn back from. And maybe it's not what I thought my life would be. But it's what it is."
meet me where the falling stars live
Amalia
