just a moment to hold

REMI

the lullaby

there's a light that you give me
when I'm in shadow

'Oh?' Remi glances over his shoulder expectantly. 'Is Ronin here?' Because despite having been married for...how long now?...hearing Mr Taliesin would always make him think of the Star. Turning back to Isla with a sly smile, because really, what was he supposed to say or do at this point? The moment had passed, the heat was gone, and Remi's balls were absolutely going to ache when he finally relieved himself at home.

Trying to focus on his own map but finding it exceedingly difficult, Remi finally just lets his eyes blur, randomly stabbing at the paper as his mind runs away with him. It's only when he's gotten too careless and his paper tears, that his eyes snap back into focus and he frowns. "Ah. A perfect example of what not to do." He says, holding up the frame toward Isla. "Well, it...can be the moon."

Holding up the paper and trying to orient the tear to where the moon is, he rotates it several times with one eye closed, as if his haphazard stars might somehow align with what's actually above him.

there's a feeling you give me, an everglow

Code blatently stolen from queen of codes, Sky!

Isla

"Hm?" For a second Isla is looking over his shoulder as well; it takes her a little longer than it ought to, really, to realise he's making a joke about exactly who it was she'd addressed, her smile a touch sheepish when she finally gets it. She continues pricking the little star holes in her map right up until the point where Remi punches straight through it, the medic's eyes widening, even as she watches him try to salvage it (it doesn't work and they both know it).

"The moon," she repeats, her tinkling laughter hitting the air only a moment later. "Oh, Remi. That's..." Terrible? The worst moon she's ever seen? "...I'll keep that one, if you don't mind," she murmurs, reaching to ease it out of his hands. As if to give those hands something else to do, Isla also moves to sit beneath one of his arms, nestled close against his side.

"It's a little hard to concentrate now, isn't it?" He's not the only one struggling, though Isla will admit that his problem is a great deal more pressing.

we're gonna separate ourselves tonight
we're always running scared but holding knives

REMI

the lullaby

there's a light that you give me
when I'm in shadow

Exhaling in such a way as to make his cheeks fill with air, Remi shakes his head, reluctantly letting Isla take the mangled map from him. The press of her against his side is unexpected but certainly not unwelcome, and as he reaches to wrap his arm around her shoulder, he knocks askew one of the larger pins that held her curls into place. Hissing in a breath, Remi tries to reach for the delicate bauble, before realizing that he had absolutely no idea how to put it back. "Ahh. Sorry." Offering the medic an apologetic wince, he exhales a sigh and frowns. "I had been trying so hard all night not to mess up your hair." He admits, running his fingers across his mouth, and then up the side of his face.

"Sorry, that...I'll be fine." Remi murmurs, his hips shifting slightly as his erection, all too keen to be talked about, is promptly ignored. "I don't...need that to want to spend time with you." Stretching his arm around her shoulders again and dismantling more of her updo in the process, Remi just hugs Isla close, feeling the sensation of her against him. "Honestly, this is one of the best dates I've ever been on." He adds with a reassuring smile.

there's a feeling you give me, an everglow

Code blatently stolen from queen of codes, Sky!

Isla

"Mm...?" Isla glances up to see one of the pins fall from her hair, and she smiles and closes Remi's fingers around it. "I'll keep your starmap, you can keep this. Just don't stab any part of yourself with it," she suggests, giving her head a gentle shake so that her curls fall a little more naturally. "You were? Oh, Remi." It's actually a very sweet admission, and Isla leans in to gently kiss his cheek, before she's promptly caught in his hug and her arms move around him in turn.

"It has?" She chuckles. "Even though I committed the cardinal sin and left you hanging in the worst possible way? Your other dates must have been awful, Remi." It's a joke but Isla still does sound reassured, leaning into his embrace and closing her eyes. "Still, even if you don't need it... it's kind of getting in the way of the date," she points out.

we're gonna separate ourselves tonight
we're always running scared but holding knives

REMI

the lullaby

there's a light that you give me
when I'm in shadow

'Well..of course.' Remi agrees, almost shyly now. "It...it seemed like you'd put so much effort into it, and I liked how it looked. It's why, when.." He glances down, wondering when he became so frustratingly awkward. "..that I didn't want to touch your hair at all." The admission is followed up by a roll of his eyes and a self-deprecating laugh, as he hums happily into the feeling of her lips against his cheek.

"It has." Glancing over his shoulder at her, the alchemist is forced to shrug. "Which either means this is a very very good date, or that most that I have been on have been really terrible." It was both, actually, but nevermind that now. "Well, yes if you keep talking about it." Remi says with a huff, this being a body part he's very much not in control over. "Like I was trying to say earlier, LongNight with you was the last time I was with anyone. Well, the last time I wanted to be with anyone, I should say." He adds with a belated shrug.

there's a feeling you give me, an everglow

Code blatently stolen from queen of codes, Sky!

Isla

"Remi, that is adorable." Isla smiles sunnily up at him, taking a moment to remove the rest of the pins from her hair (she keeps these, so she doesn't have to hunt them down again for their next(?) outing). "Well, if I put up my hair again, I'll invite you over so you can see how simple it is, really. Then you might not feel so bad messing it up." With a surgeon's hands, perhaps Isla just makes it look simple. All the more reason to get his opinion.

Offering an apologetic smile that's almost a wince, she gives his side a gentle nudge before melting against him, determined not to mention the tent in his pants again unless he directly puts her hand on it. "Sorry," she murmurs, shifting to get more comfortable and letting the sound of his voice carry her into newer territory. "Mm...? There was a time when you didn't want to be with someone?" she asks, obviously puzzled.

we're gonna separate ourselves tonight
we're always running scared but holding knives

REMI

the lullaby

there's a light that you give me
when I'm in shadow

Remi watches clearly entranced as Isla removes the pins. Her hair unfurls and flows down her shoulders with ease, and he finds himself staring with far too much focus to try and figure out how it was all held together. "Oh? I..think I'd like that." Biting the inside of his cheek and making his smile lopsided in the process, he nods eagerly. Reaching up, Remi combs his fingers through her hair, watching as it falls effortless through his fingers.

With his arm now fixedly around her, Remi crosses his legs at the ankles and looks up at the sky. "Mmmm, I suppose that's maybe a harsh way of saying it." He admits, looking down at her as his fingers switch from smoothing the fabric straps of her dress to drawing soft patterns against her skin. "I went to find Phoebe at the brothel, and the new Madame asked me when my preference was." Quickly, he shakes his head. "But I hadn't gone there for that. Just to check up on Phoebe. But I realized after being with you...I didn't quite know how to answer that anymore." Remi's smile is bashful now, his cheeks dimpled. "And so she...offered to try and help me figure it out. It didn't work. Or rather, I suppose it did. Despite everything, at the end of it, I didn't want to sleep with her." It will likely ring very differently in Isla's ears, but for the alchemist at least, the experience with Maeve had been safe and informative.

"That's when I realized that...it is only you."

there's a feeling you give me, an everglow

Code blatently stolen from queen of codes, Sky!

Isla

"I'd quite like to show you," Isla admits as well, smiling to him. "It's been a very long time since I was able to do something as simple as putting up my hair. The infirmary isn't really the place for it, as you might well imagine." Her eyes close to enjoy the sensation, muted as it might be, of his fingers gliding through her hair, Isla's head lolling comfortably against his shoulder as his arm folds more securely around her. Finally, it seems they've stepped out of awkward conversation.

Aaaand then Remi tells his brothel story. Isla's pebble blues flutter open again, and whilst she doesn't look up at the alchemist, the way she surreptitiously stiffens in his arms might say as much about her opinion on the matter as anything. "Did you tell her what happened between us?" she wonders softly, trying very hard to get a handle on her emotions. A difficult thing when she doesn't realise that the hand she's been strumming gently over Remi's knee suddenly has claws, reducing the fabric to ribbons.

"Mm... but she wanted to sleep with you, I imagine."

we're gonna separate ourselves tonight
we're always running scared but holding knives

REMI

the lullaby

there's a light that you give me
when I'm in shadow

Surprised by this sudden change, Remi frowns and tilts his head as much as he can without upsetting the position Isla has fit herself in. "No." He replies immediately, shaking his head and feeling as though he needs to pick his words very carefully though not entirely knowing why. "I just said that I'd been with a woman and that I enjoyed it. That's all." Swallowing hard, Remi is reluctant to use his magic to pull out Isla's emotions, feeling suddenly like there's a wall between them that he shouldn't unfairly leap over.

"She...well, that is her job. But...well." Awkwardly Remi's brows furrow as he notices that he can now see the skin of his knee through his pants. Reaching down with his free hand, he tries to insert his fingers between hers. Blades or no, he'll risk amputation to hold her hand. "..yes. She was very aroused." Swallowing hard, Remi toes curl in his shoes, having no idea why or how he suddenly found himself in such deep water.

"Ronin and...Vai are the only ones who know everything. And even then, not everything everything." This is almost hesitantly said; Remi assuming that honesty was what Isla was after, but apparently not knowing when to shut up around her.

there's a feeling you give me, an everglow

Code blatently stolen from queen of codes, Sky!

Isla

Isla wishes she could put a name to whatever it is she's feeling, and whatever it's doing to her and to the knee of Remi's pants. To have been his best friend, then dead, then literally a part of his soul for long enough that it was like wearing a favourite shirt, then dead again, killed by Remi, to... to this? It's safe to say that she's discovering a lot about herself in the way of unexplored trauma, and she nuzzles a little closer and lets him slip his hand into hers.

With an effort of will her claws retract to the soft pads of her fingers, and she lets out a long sigh she absolutely doesn't need. "Okay," she mumbles, half burying her face against his chest. "Okay. Sorry, I don't know what came over me, there. I'll get you a new pair of pants," she mumbles, before scoffing out a small laugh.

"Ronin is going to think I assaulted you."

we're gonna separate ourselves tonight
we're always running scared but holding knives

REMI

the lullaby

there's a light that you give me
when I'm in shadow

"I don't care even a little bit about the pants." Remi whispers against the top of her hair, tugging her closer with the hand wrapped around her. "Well, and even if he does. Still not my worst date." The joke is probably poorly timed, but the alchemist is finding it hard to know when he's dealing with bffIsla, versus dateIsla. There are only slight differences he's learning, but the nuances seem to be more important than he's giving them credit for.

"Should I not have mentioned it? To her, I mean? Honestly..and maybe I was just being naive, but I thought she might actually have a way of knowing. Working in a brothel. But it was all just..." Her fingers in his hair, her body wound around his, the bath, the press of him over her and the taste of her on his tongue...now, it just makes him shrug. "...it made me feel like I did when I was younger. When I had to pretend to be someone else. "

Rubbing at her palm with his thumb, and then bringing it to his lips, Remi doesn't kiss her hand so much as he just clasps it. Closing his eyes and breathing in the faint smell of her, feeling the chill of her skin against his lips and the tip of his nose, eventually, he opens his eyes to gaze at her. "I have never felt the way I do with you, with any other woman. I don't think I ever will."

there's a feeling you give me, an everglow

Code blatently stolen from queen of codes, Sky!

Isla

"I am starting to worry what sort of dates you have been on," Isla admits with a soft chuckle, her spirits lifting however briefly. It makes sense, what he says and why he says it, and Isla forces herself out of the mire of emotion that she's found herself wading in to nod at him. "I'd never want you to feel as though you needed to pretend to be someone else. I like to think I'd be able to tell, at this point, anyway." With a softer sigh, she peers up at him to watch the clasp of her fingers against his lips.

"It's not so much that you should or shouldn't have done anything," she admits. "I suppose I just... I've not been able to feel like that for years. And with you, it was..." Well, he knows exactly how it was. "Maybe it's just an old hangup from being a duchess, not wanting to kiss and tell." Isla relaxes somewhat, then, as if able to find the truth of it, at least in part.

Still, wonderful as his compliments are, Isla can only shrug and offer him a wry smile. "Well," she says, "I'm more Ascended than anything now, aren't I?"

we're gonna separate ourselves tonight
we're always running scared but holding knives

REMI

the lullaby

there's a light that you give me
when I'm in shadow

Remi can only smirk at that, offering Isla nothing but a vague bob of his eyebrows for her to go on. But as the conversation swings from his past experiences to those he has with her, the alchemist's expression grows a good deal more sombre as he immediately shakes his head. "I never feel that way. When I close my eyes with you, I don't see anyone else. I don't have to see anyone else."

Nodding against her hand—she would likely have an easier time telling if he was pretending than most—he presses her palm against his cheek as he listens. "Ah, well. It wasn't bragging or anything like that. With Ronin, it was...well." He shrugs. "We've reaffirmed our need to be honest with one another. And with Vai?" Remi's lips twitch upward in a small and shy uthat makes his cheeks softly dimple. "The first time I ever kissed a man, or at least when one kissed me, she was the one I went to for advice about how I was feeling. Everything with you...isn't so different." He doesn't sound quite apologetic when speaking of who he had told and why, and in the days to come, he'd wonder why it was Isla found it so surprising.

"No." Leaning back, moving her hand from his cheek so that he could gaze over his shoulder at her, Remi shakes his head emphatically. "You're more you than anything. This body...what organs you have and how everything is run, that isn't you. This is." Reaching up to cup her cheek, he taps his finger against her temple.

there's a feeling you give me, an everglow

Code blatently stolen from queen of codes, Sky!

Isla

Isla relaxes by degrees until it's as though the craziness of the past few minutes never happened (and really, when she gets home she'll be taking a long look in the mirror and asking herself what the fuck). Remi's words, soft and honest and making so much sense that the doctor in her feels positively ashamed of her behaviour, she all but slouches against him in her relief. "Well, the fact that you came out here with me tonight says that it must have been pretty good advice, no?" She smiles.

Remi taps gently at her temples and it's enough to have Isla blushing all over again; this time she elbows him playfully as if to ask if he wouldn't mind turning the charm down just a tad, please. "That's... probably the sweetest thing someone has said to be for a long time, Remi," she admits, tucking a curl behind her ears and glancing away. "I will try to remind myself of that more often."

we're gonna separate ourselves tonight
we're always running scared but holding knives