NATE
”You won’t lose her again.” How can his voice be so steady, when it’s so uncertain? When he can’t make that promise in any way that matters? But Nate knows in some way that he won’t let anything happen to Kiada, won’t let anything happen to any of the ascended as much as he can help it. It’s why he’d agreed to become a Demi-god, isn’t it? To help to safeguard their Family?
Nate listens. He offers that where he hadn’t even been given the chance to plead his case, though his lips are purses in an unhappy twist the entire time, and his one eye is glassy and blank. It’s only the motion of his jaw, the barely there nods that show he’s even listening at all. Swallowing as Hotaru stumbles, Nate opens his mouth, moves to fill the silence, when he catches sight of the glassiness that lingers in mismatched eyes (eyes that his own had matched, not too long ago) and he has to let his gaze drop as quickly as hers does. The ascended isn’t made for things like this, doesn’t have the tact it requires, doesn’t have the balls to say that he’s gutted.
”I’m getting really tired of other people making decisions like that for me.” Nate had thought of anyone, Hotaru would understand that, would understand the need to have some kind of agency in such a large choice. A wet hand comes up to rub at his face, Nate half considering slipping under the water and not coming up again. ”I didn’t need anything offered. I needed you, and you left, again.” Maybe of this was the first time, if it didn’t come so soon after other betrayals, he could forgive it. But he’s angry, hurt.
Something bitter bubbles out of him when she says she’d asked Wessex, of all people, to keep an eye on him. Like he was some kind of child who needed watching, or a pet that couldn’t be trusted alone. It does nothing to help him, nothing to stop the burning cold in his chest where a heart once sat. He looks up just in time to meet her gaze, fluid shimmering in his one blue eye, though it’s blank behind the bushes tears. ”I’m getting really sick of people apologizing to me too.”
Nate listens. He offers that where he hadn’t even been given the chance to plead his case, though his lips are purses in an unhappy twist the entire time, and his one eye is glassy and blank. It’s only the motion of his jaw, the barely there nods that show he’s even listening at all. Swallowing as Hotaru stumbles, Nate opens his mouth, moves to fill the silence, when he catches sight of the glassiness that lingers in mismatched eyes (eyes that his own had matched, not too long ago) and he has to let his gaze drop as quickly as hers does. The ascended isn’t made for things like this, doesn’t have the tact it requires, doesn’t have the balls to say that he’s gutted.
”I’m getting really tired of other people making decisions like that for me.” Nate had thought of anyone, Hotaru would understand that, would understand the need to have some kind of agency in such a large choice. A wet hand comes up to rub at his face, Nate half considering slipping under the water and not coming up again. ”I didn’t need anything offered. I needed you, and you left, again.” Maybe of this was the first time, if it didn’t come so soon after other betrayals, he could forgive it. But he’s angry, hurt.
Something bitter bubbles out of him when she says she’d asked Wessex, of all people, to keep an eye on him. Like he was some kind of child who needed watching, or a pet that couldn’t be trusted alone. It does nothing to help him, nothing to stop the burning cold in his chest where a heart once sat. He looks up just in time to meet her gaze, fluid shimmering in his one blue eye, though it’s blank behind the bushes tears. ”I’m getting really sick of people apologizing to me too.”
I am tasting myself
In the mouth of the sun
In the mouth of the sun
