Saartjie
"His red hair wasn't so bad." It had actually been rather pretty, in Saartjie's opinion. Whenever the sunlight would hit Gaal's hair she could see the different shades of auburn and gold that made up the unique color. "It was everything else under that mop of red hair that was terrible." Talking about it, though, she couldn't help but try to imagine what her kid might have looked like had she actually had one. Sons usually came first so she imagined a boy that looked similar to Sunjata when he was young, but with Gaal's red hair and his eyes. Surprisingly, there was a pang of longing and she shoved it and the image of the child away because it wasn't going to happen.
"No, he had no clue." She was thankful for the question because she could concentrate on that and not try to analyze she had suddenly felt the longing for a child. "If he had known that I purposely ended a pregnancy ... I would have gotten far worse than a tattoo." Far worse than a beating, even. There had been many times over the course of her short marriage -- thought it admittedly felt like it had lasted an entire lifetime -- that she'd been confined to the house because of the bruises on her face that even makeup could't completely cover.
A very unlady-like snort came from Saartjie. "Are you kidding? He didn't trust me one bit." The moment she had come home with the pills he had begun asking her what they were and demanding to see them. "We thought of that. Gazali forged a prescription label to make them look legit." If he wouldn't have then there was no way Gaal would have allowed her to take the pills and she would have had to sneak and risk getting caught. The concequences for that ...
It did give her some comfort that Jata did not see the shame in the tattoo that everyone else from their home did. "Thank you." It represented the first step in taking control of her own life and not letting someone else dictate it for her. "What's it like?" the question was sudden, but as she asked it she looked up to study her brother's face. "Being married to someone you love? Someone who loves you?" The only marriages she had ever seen had been arranged as her own had been. Gaal claimed that he loved her on occasion, but she wasn't stupid. She knew the only thing he loved was the fact that his marriage to her was a stepping stone to getting the power he wanted. After the experience she'd had with him she wasn't sure if she ever wanted to be married to anyone again let alone be in any sort of relationship.
A smile spread across her face when he promised that they would go flying and to the beach. "I haven't been to the beach in so long." Whenever Gaal would suggest going to the beach she would come up with some excuse about why she couldn't go. The beach was a special place to her and she didn't want her memories of it tainted by Gaal. "I haven't let anyone else braid my hair since you left." It was yet another memory that she hadn't wanted anyone else to taint. "Have you braided Kamaria's hair? I think she would like it."
"No, he had no clue." She was thankful for the question because she could concentrate on that and not try to analyze she had suddenly felt the longing for a child. "If he had known that I purposely ended a pregnancy ... I would have gotten far worse than a tattoo." Far worse than a beating, even. There had been many times over the course of her short marriage -- thought it admittedly felt like it had lasted an entire lifetime -- that she'd been confined to the house because of the bruises on her face that even makeup could't completely cover.
A very unlady-like snort came from Saartjie. "Are you kidding? He didn't trust me one bit." The moment she had come home with the pills he had begun asking her what they were and demanding to see them. "We thought of that. Gazali forged a prescription label to make them look legit." If he wouldn't have then there was no way Gaal would have allowed her to take the pills and she would have had to sneak and risk getting caught. The concequences for that ...
It did give her some comfort that Jata did not see the shame in the tattoo that everyone else from their home did. "Thank you." It represented the first step in taking control of her own life and not letting someone else dictate it for her. "What's it like?" the question was sudden, but as she asked it she looked up to study her brother's face. "Being married to someone you love? Someone who loves you?" The only marriages she had ever seen had been arranged as her own had been. Gaal claimed that he loved her on occasion, but she wasn't stupid. She knew the only thing he loved was the fact that his marriage to her was a stepping stone to getting the power he wanted. After the experience she'd had with him she wasn't sure if she ever wanted to be married to anyone again let alone be in any sort of relationship.
A smile spread across her face when he promised that they would go flying and to the beach. "I haven't been to the beach in so long." Whenever Gaal would suggest going to the beach she would come up with some excuse about why she couldn't go. The beach was a special place to her and she didn't want her memories of it tainted by Gaal. "I haven't let anyone else braid my hair since you left." It was yet another memory that she hadn't wanted anyone else to taint. "Have you braided Kamaria's hair? I think she would like it."
but close my eyes for a while
and force from the world a patient smile
and force from the world a patient smile
