Aurelia
over the riots
above all the noise
above all the noise
"No but, what I felt..." she brings a hand up to the side of her face as her eyes sink shut and tears trail down. She knows it all too well, that darkness within herself that doesn't have anything to do with being Abandoned or not. "It was the same, Milo," her voice is unsteady, fractured, disappointed. So is she, exhaustion and emotion doing all that they can to pull her down. "I wanted to hurt them and it didn't matter how." Maybe she's digging her hole deeper, but it doesn't matter. It's the truth and she won't keep it hidden away, not from him. She might be able to shoulder past the others, but Milo? No.
It's a good thing he's closing the distance because she doesn't know how much longer she can stand to carry the weight alone. He draws her into his chest and she doesn't have any fight left in her for the moment. She buries herself in the shelter he gives her, hiding her face and pressing her hands in against him.
She listens, silent but for the muffled crying that's unleashed on him like a river. She couldn't explain it herself but he's made her feel far too vulnerable now to be able to hold any of it back. For a few minutes, she absorbs the things he's said, letting the words sink in even if they don't really make it through to her yet.
"I thought I was past it," she says into the fabric of his shirt. Her cheek moves to rest against his chest so her face is no longer covered but so she also doesn't have to look at him. "But I'm not, Milo, not at all," her hands squeeze tight around him, "I still have all this hate and blame... and nowhere for it to go." So it coils within her, waiting for the perfect moment to be unleashed, to sink its teeth into anyone that would dare tempt it. It's frightening, how deep that pit within her goes, how dark it feels.
A breath of air sucks in through her flaring nostrils. "The fire brought everything back, and all I could think about was what happened to my father. How painful it must have been, and... I lost it. I wanted them to feel that pain." Her hands quiver and her teeth grit as some of that same fury comes crawling back. She wanted them to feel regret for their actions, for the senselessness within them. What had it even been for?
It's a good thing he's closing the distance because she doesn't know how much longer she can stand to carry the weight alone. He draws her into his chest and she doesn't have any fight left in her for the moment. She buries herself in the shelter he gives her, hiding her face and pressing her hands in against him.
She listens, silent but for the muffled crying that's unleashed on him like a river. She couldn't explain it herself but he's made her feel far too vulnerable now to be able to hold any of it back. For a few minutes, she absorbs the things he's said, letting the words sink in even if they don't really make it through to her yet.
"I thought I was past it," she says into the fabric of his shirt. Her cheek moves to rest against his chest so her face is no longer covered but so she also doesn't have to look at him. "But I'm not, Milo, not at all," her hands squeeze tight around him, "I still have all this hate and blame... and nowhere for it to go." So it coils within her, waiting for the perfect moment to be unleashed, to sink its teeth into anyone that would dare tempt it. It's frightening, how deep that pit within her goes, how dark it feels.
A breath of air sucks in through her flaring nostrils. "The fire brought everything back, and all I could think about was what happened to my father. How painful it must have been, and... I lost it. I wanted them to feel that pain." Her hands quiver and her teeth grit as some of that same fury comes crawling back. She wanted them to feel regret for their actions, for the senselessness within them. What had it even been for?
through all the worry
i still hear your voice
i still hear your voice
