did goodbye mean letting go?
They don’t listen. Their words are wild and chaotic, difficult to follow, and her own go unheard. Her pain does not even make Sunjata flinch, her emotions do not cause him to even bat an eye. They have made their judgment of her. And she is so, so tired.
Straightening, horribly human once more, Hotaru reaches for the back of the chair behind her to steady herself. It hurts, but in the distant way that all things hurt now.
“I came to try and prove my innocence. That was all.” The sting of his words are not responded to. Would she have done it, if they asked? If they had expressed a single iota of desire to have her return? Yes, she thinks miserably. Yes, she would have. But as she looks into their eyes, she doesn’t see any sign of that. Only a cold surety that they are right and she is wrong. That they have been hurt more. It is juvenile, just as Seren had said, and Hotaru’s heart is too broken to try.
Most of Sunjata’s words are blatantly ignored. He twists her words thrice over, and she will not entertain his stupidity - or needling, whatever it is that spurns it. “She was no soulmate, merely human. Do not try and compare the two. If you lose Haai, you will know the difference.” Because she will not defend herself, but Atlas? He deserves that much when they won’t even think twice about the weight of a companion’s loss.
There are too many things that still long to be said, sequestered away in her breast. She decided to let them wither there. There is clearly no logic or empathy to be gained from them, which only hurts her all the more. History, love, it has no bearing on one mistake - one they cannot even prove her to be guilty of. “I’d like to leave now,” she says softly, eyes vacant on the bloody marks on her dress. “I came to talk about the fire. Not this. And if you will not believe me, then I would rather return home. A missive to Morgan with your decision would be appreciated.” So that she may tell the Warden it is done, whatever they choose her consequence to be, biased and hateful they may be in their judgment.
There is no point in fighting to be heard. Understood. For all she may still be tortured by her love for them, clearly they do not feel the same. And that is all the proof she needs that Deimos was right, despite their protestations. They moved on as if they’d never loved her at all. Her words are nothing more than a distant buzz, and Hotaru will not stand around to be yelled at with no real purpose in sight.
Straightening, horribly human once more, Hotaru reaches for the back of the chair behind her to steady herself. It hurts, but in the distant way that all things hurt now.
“I came to try and prove my innocence. That was all.” The sting of his words are not responded to. Would she have done it, if they asked? If they had expressed a single iota of desire to have her return? Yes, she thinks miserably. Yes, she would have. But as she looks into their eyes, she doesn’t see any sign of that. Only a cold surety that they are right and she is wrong. That they have been hurt more. It is juvenile, just as Seren had said, and Hotaru’s heart is too broken to try.
Most of Sunjata’s words are blatantly ignored. He twists her words thrice over, and she will not entertain his stupidity - or needling, whatever it is that spurns it. “She was no soulmate, merely human. Do not try and compare the two. If you lose Haai, you will know the difference.” Because she will not defend herself, but Atlas? He deserves that much when they won’t even think twice about the weight of a companion’s loss.
There are too many things that still long to be said, sequestered away in her breast. She decided to let them wither there. There is clearly no logic or empathy to be gained from them, which only hurts her all the more. History, love, it has no bearing on one mistake - one they cannot even prove her to be guilty of. “I’d like to leave now,” she says softly, eyes vacant on the bloody marks on her dress. “I came to talk about the fire. Not this. And if you will not believe me, then I would rather return home. A missive to Morgan with your decision would be appreciated.” So that she may tell the Warden it is done, whatever they choose her consequence to be, biased and hateful they may be in their judgment.
There is no point in fighting to be heard. Understood. For all she may still be tortured by her love for them, clearly they do not feel the same. And that is all the proof she needs that Deimos was right, despite their protestations. They moved on as if they’d never loved her at all. Her words are nothing more than a distant buzz, and Hotaru will not stand around to be yelled at with no real purpose in sight.
and did letting go mean forever?
HOTARU
