From being an Abandoned who had rarely left the Hollowed Grounds, to embracing the call of adventure, to dying and being reborn first as an Ascended and then as an Ancient, Maea has gone through quite the amount of changes in her life. One thing remains common, though, in her attempts to find out just where she belongs; she’s always had a craving for knowledge which has brought her to so many places and to meet so many people here in Caido. We can’t wait to see what else is in store for her!
Congratulations, Maea!
Credits
Court of the Fallen was created in October of 2018 by Odd, Honey, and Crooked.
Skinning and hosting by the epically talented Kaons, and functionality fanciness by the coding magic of Neowulf. If you ever see either of them around, make sure to show them some love!
"I don't know," Ronin whispers, pressing his eyes shut and shifting to his knees as he feels Safrin's weight leave him. "But I'm worried that I don't really shine any more. I just cause damage." Raking his fingers through his hair, he turns to gaze at her, beautiful and distant as any of the stars in the sky above them.
Scoffing out a humourless laugh, he shakes his head. "Better than this," he mumbles. "I thought I could come here, we'd enjoy a little picnic on the blanket, I could tell you all about the horrible things I wanted to do to someone I'm pretty sure doesn't deserve it, and... I don't know." Maybe you could help me fix it. Or forget about it. Either way.
sweet dreams till sunbeams find you, sweet dreams that leave all worries behind you
"Tell me, then." Striding toward him, Safrin stops short of him and drops to her knees while her eyes remain trained on his. Reaching for the shirt she'd tugged off, she holds it out to him as she settles once again on the blanket. Ronin will find that the ground has grown hard beneath them again, though whether this is an indication of anything is up to him to decide.
Reaching for the basket of berries, Safrin produces a large strawberry that becomes doused in sweet cream as it nears her lips. Head tilted to the side for him to begin, the goddess offers him a patient stare as she takes a bite. It stains her lips an alluring red as she hums a sound of satisfaction at the tangy and sweet brilliance of it.
but in your dreams whatever they be, dream a little dream of me
06-25-2021, 08:42 PM (This post was last modified: 06-25-2021, 08:51 PM by Ronin.)
I swear I still believe but I don't know
Therein lies the problem, though - if he tells her then his thoughts become real, and thoughts made real run the risk of becoming plans, of becoming goals. And yet as she moves back towards him, as the world becomes depressingly real around them again, he accepts his shirt and pulls it back on, sitting with his goddess on a night that feels cold to Ronin, despite the Longheat weather.
"I considered just going to Halo and destroying the place where she lives," he mutters. "Or dreaming with her, so I could see how far I could push the nightmares." All remarkably tame, given what he could really do if he got creative. "I shouldn't hate a child that belongs to Remi, but I can't find it in myself to want it to exist," he confesses. "I have always wanted..." He shakes his head, surprising himself with the sting of tears in his eyes.
"Anyway." Clearing his throat, he lets out a shaky breath and sits up a fraction. "That's it, I suppose. Just petty violence for reasons that aren't good enough."
sweet dreams till sunbeams find you, sweet dreams that leave all worries behind you
"Homes can be rebuilt." Safrin says with a shrug. Dreams...that was interesting. "I doubt it would be hard to lull her to your side, mmm?" If there was anyone who had thus far resisted Ronin's charms, Safrin didn't know of them.
'Shouldn't you? A child born out of selfishness and carelessness? A child that has literally no need to exist? A child that now binds two strangers together?" Carefully chosen, Safrin's list can clearly not be applied to Ronin or Seren. "Wanted what, sugar?" She encourages softly, setting down the uneaten portion of her strawberry.
"It is because you are too good that the reasons aren't enough. And because you know that burning wood and a few night terrors will not provide you comfort in the long run." Because it would be a long run. The lives we wish to be cut short are often those that escape death the most.
but in your dreams whatever they be, dream a little dream of me
"If I could lie well enough for long enough, no. I don't imagine it would be difficult." The floodgates are open - Ronin doesn't think he has ever spoken about the reality of his effect on others, or the things he could do if he put his mind to the machinations. And now that he's started, he doesn't think he's able to stop. "I doubt it would happen this side of LeafChange, though. I am not at my most charming at this time of year." A mirthless laugh chokes out of him, the Star keeping his eyes on the stitches of the blanket.
And as Safrin probes further he shrugs his shoulders, even though the answer dances on his tongue. His sight blurs, Ronin swiping at his cheeks with the back of his hand. "I have always wanted a large family," he mutters. "Back when I was a soldier, I used to imagine this stupid house in the countryside, a bunch of kids, the whole crappy picket fence." He sniffs. "And when Remi said he didn't want any more children, I agreed. Because I didn't, not after everything. And now..."
Now one was on the way and he had absolutely no part to play in it.
"I know," he agrees softly. "There's a tie between them now that will never be broken." Taking a shuddering breath, he offers the lady of the stars a very guilty smile indeed. "I am so sorry," he says. "I believe I know something about what you feel, now. I do not like to share."
sweet dreams till sunbeams find you, sweet dreams that leave all worries behind you
'You could.' Safrin assures him easily with a sweeping smile. "After LeafChange will be too late." She points out easily, reaching into the basket for a strawberry and offering it casually to Ronin. "Some women like a man who is a bit hot under the collar. You might be surprised how you're received...especially now that Hotaru has a feline shift." Ronin already knew how well a good chase went over with large predators.
"And now his family is growing." Safrin finishes for him.
Reaching out her hands to wipe away the lingering dampness shining on his cheeks, the goddess nods as her long lashes flutter close. "And yet..." Safrin shrugs. "Think of all the things you could do if you were mine. The brothers and sisters Seren might have, playing in yards filled with bluegrass and violets by an ocean of stars..." Wistfully, she looks over her shoulder toward the window, as if the white picket fence Ronin had mentioned might have popped up on the beach.
"You could make up for things not..achieved last time, as well."
but in your dreams whatever they be, dream a little dream of me
"A shame I don't feel the same way about this particular woman," Ronin says with a scoff, though he'd be lying if he said the cogs in his mind weren't starting to whir and spin at the consideration. "What would I even do, in a dream like that? It isn't as though I could trap her there. I don't have the ability," he murmurs. All hypothetical, of course. Absolutely hypothetical.
He doesn't trust himself to speak as she finishes his sentence, offering only a sad nod to confirm that yes, that's exactly it. A new branch of Remi's family, separate from Ronin even if he had somehow been alright with it all.
And yet is both painful and maddening, even as Ronin leans into the caress of her fingertips. "Safrin, please," he mumbles, as if the dream she's offering is like a knife to his throat. He knows the things he's lost and missed out on, and although the thought of more tiny feet and round cheeks is tempting, along with it comes the terror that they might be snatched away yet again.
"You know I am yours already, besides. That will never change."
sweet dreams till sunbeams find you, sweet dreams that leave all worries behind you
"A dreamfish killed beneath a fullmoon...the blood of a certain man with such an ability...that fish, when touched, would be capable of the sort of dream you're talking about."
Her fingers splay across his cheeks, warm and soft. Her thumbs brush against his lower lip to still his words even as he tries to deny her. "Not only mine." She corrects with a whisper. "Besides, were you truly mine, you could rise up into the heavens should the need ever arise again, as it did with Seren." Leaning forward slightly, Safrin's galactic gaze grows dark and deep. "Imagine what it could be like.." She whispers. "All your memories of Remi could be locked away in a box...all that pain. All the anger you are forced to feel at the hands of such a careless and selfish man. Replace it with sticky fingers on your cheeks and tiny voices demanding to hear stories of all the things you've done in this world...Everything could be so much better for you Ronin. You could have more love than your heart could handle..."
but in your dreams whatever they be, dream a little dream of me
The information that Safrin gives, whilst not at the top of Ronin's agenda (not yet, anyway), is nonetheless stored away safe and sound. He will likely remember it, not when it is most convenient, but when he is feeling at his most vindictive. But at present the only thing he can hear and see and feel is the goddess with her fingers brushing against his cheeks, her voice sinking into his bones and making them feel heavy.
It would be so easy. It wouldn't even be unpleasant. Arguably, it would be better than any and all the trouble he's dragging himself through currently, and Ronin's eyes close against her dark, galactic gaze, afraid he might drown in it. And drown happily. "I already do," he whispers finally. He already does have more love than his heart can handle, and that is precisely the problem here.
"Safrin, I need to go. I can't... I need to think. Please."
sweet dreams till sunbeams find you, sweet dreams that leave all worries behind you
'You are a glutton for punishment.' It isn't warmly said, and though her hands remain softly on his face, there is something decidedly more dangerous in her grasp. "A glass full of piss and one full of wine are both full." She snaps, releasing him. Shadows and smoke dance around her, and suddenly she is at the window, looking at him disapprovingly over her shoulder.
"Just because the piss is yours does not mean you should continue drinking it." Her eyes glitter darkly as outside the stars laugh their mockery at the Star's failed attempts to toe this line with Safrin.
"My love for you might be endless Ronin, but my patience is not."
At least this time when she vanishes, the Star keeps his powers. Whether that is a blessing or a curse is yet to be seen.
~FIN
but in your dreams whatever they be, dream a little dream of me
