I'll leave my love hidden in the sun
The starchild’s expression softened slightly as Hotaru clarified. She had misunderstood, made assumptions based on stray words plucked out of context. It lessened some of her worries, but did not erase all of them.
“I am sorry that you were made to feel alone,” she offered, her tone warming with sympathy that was never far away, despite how intense the conversation was becoming. “I… can’t say I understand your desperation for recognition. But that is probably on me, because I have never felt lonely that way. I do know the feeling of wanting to trust people I meet for the first time, and I am really glad that you chose to stay with Frey.” It did speak for Hotaru that she made that choice… though the choice of deity hardly endeared her with Safrin. Seren was unconcerned about that, she was relatively unbiased when it came to the other Heralds.
“Like I said, I don’t agree with the way the Acquired have been treated. I would change that, if I could. I offered Deimos to speak to mother about it, and did so too… though I don’t know how much of a different it makes. I also talked to a Fae diplomat, about possibly offering the Abandoned a haven in the Greatwood. They already live with magic, and in attunement with the Gods. Perhaps something can grow from there... ” She shrugged, wishing there was more she could do. Maybe the war would change things. If the Voice was removed, and her shadow no longer hovered over the other magic users - but that was impossible to know for sure.
When it came to Atlas, however, and Hotaru’s past experience as a ruler… the girl could only shake her head.
“You are right, I don’t know much about you,” she agreed. Softly, and a little sad - they should have had a chance to talk about the past before any of this had to be addressed. “That is why I have only your current lowest points to go by. And Hotaru, you have to admit that it doesn’t make you look very good. I am not trying to belittle Atlas, not at all. Nor am I trying to be cruel. It is because he was a soul that I worry about the choices you made. You call them mistakes, and I am sure it was. Reckless, and foolish, with much too high a cost.
"If you take that risk with your own companion… and with yourself... how can I believe you will not endanger other people the same way? A Warden have to live for its people, not jump into the fray personally and die a glorious martyr death. Who will do that if you sacrifice yourself and pieces of your soul? If you are reckless in personal matters… What I’m trying to say is, will ruling not become a personal matter, too?”
The fire had begun to burn low. Reaching for the pile to add another log to it, Seren took a moment to breathe, and collect herself.
“I want to believe that you will be a good Warden. If Deimos will not accept the role, then you are as valid an option as anyone. I certainly can’t do it, nor do I particularly want to. I just… don’t know if you are the best option. Or if you should be doing this on your own.”
Leaning back, and settling her chin in the palm of a hand, Seren considered her friend with a thoughtful expression. That Morgan had to be replaced was beyond a shadow of a doubt in her mind, since it was what Safrin wanted. That Deimos was involved made her inclined to lend her aid, the way Hotaru had suggested. It was the aftermath that made her hesitate, nibbling teeth worrying at a lip until it became sore and swollen with indecision. It would be too late to change her mind once this snowball had been set to rolling.
“I am sorry that you were made to feel alone,” she offered, her tone warming with sympathy that was never far away, despite how intense the conversation was becoming. “I… can’t say I understand your desperation for recognition. But that is probably on me, because I have never felt lonely that way. I do know the feeling of wanting to trust people I meet for the first time, and I am really glad that you chose to stay with Frey.” It did speak for Hotaru that she made that choice… though the choice of deity hardly endeared her with Safrin. Seren was unconcerned about that, she was relatively unbiased when it came to the other Heralds.
“Like I said, I don’t agree with the way the Acquired have been treated. I would change that, if I could. I offered Deimos to speak to mother about it, and did so too… though I don’t know how much of a different it makes. I also talked to a Fae diplomat, about possibly offering the Abandoned a haven in the Greatwood. They already live with magic, and in attunement with the Gods. Perhaps something can grow from there... ” She shrugged, wishing there was more she could do. Maybe the war would change things. If the Voice was removed, and her shadow no longer hovered over the other magic users - but that was impossible to know for sure.
When it came to Atlas, however, and Hotaru’s past experience as a ruler… the girl could only shake her head.
“You are right, I don’t know much about you,” she agreed. Softly, and a little sad - they should have had a chance to talk about the past before any of this had to be addressed. “That is why I have only your current lowest points to go by. And Hotaru, you have to admit that it doesn’t make you look very good. I am not trying to belittle Atlas, not at all. Nor am I trying to be cruel. It is because he was a soul that I worry about the choices you made. You call them mistakes, and I am sure it was. Reckless, and foolish, with much too high a cost.
"If you take that risk with your own companion… and with yourself... how can I believe you will not endanger other people the same way? A Warden have to live for its people, not jump into the fray personally and die a glorious martyr death. Who will do that if you sacrifice yourself and pieces of your soul? If you are reckless in personal matters… What I’m trying to say is, will ruling not become a personal matter, too?”
The fire had begun to burn low. Reaching for the pile to add another log to it, Seren took a moment to breathe, and collect herself.
“I want to believe that you will be a good Warden. If Deimos will not accept the role, then you are as valid an option as anyone. I certainly can’t do it, nor do I particularly want to. I just… don’t know if you are the best option. Or if you should be doing this on your own.”
Leaning back, and settling her chin in the palm of a hand, Seren considered her friend with a thoughtful expression. That Morgan had to be replaced was beyond a shadow of a doubt in her mind, since it was what Safrin wanted. That Deimos was involved made her inclined to lend her aid, the way Hotaru had suggested. It was the aftermath that made her hesitate, nibbling teeth worrying at a lip until it became sore and swollen with indecision. It would be too late to change her mind once this snowball had been set to rolling.
For when the darkness comes
SEREN
