Hotaru
“Thank you,” she breathes, and feels like there is finally a light beginning to bloom in the blackness. But these are all future sentiments, reliant upon Hotaru being able to guide Phoebe through the act of shifting. Maybe that’s why she is able to compartmentalize so well, aware that if she fails she will only have to go longer without seeing her children.
It seems those worries are unfounded however, as Phoebe shifts beautifully - as naturally as most Attuned, once they know where to look - and even her wild and startled reaction cannot prompt a laugh from the grieving woman. A small twitch of the lips more grimace than smile steals across her face.
She changes, deciding on her hawk form lest the woman’s unicorn-instincts fear the more predatory mountain lion. Its okay Phoebe. You did it. Hold still, it’ll take some time to adjust to your new body and you don’t want to fall. And by the way - you’re a unicorn. And it’s the last straw, that reminder of the companion she has lost. In this form, connected as they are, Hotaru’s walls turn to little more than dust and debris. And Phoebe will feel it - all of it - seasons of grief and loss; Sunjata, Nate, Atlas. The stress of Halo, of Safrin’s judgement, Noah and Deimos’ absence. Remi and the twins, and the shame and loneliness that eats like a slow acid at her soul. And then the blackness - the depression, the desire for it all to end. It is all there, cloying up the bond like a miasmic concoction of sensations and emotions. Dragging Phoebe down with her unintentionally into the pit she’d been living in for seasons.
It seems those worries are unfounded however, as Phoebe shifts beautifully - as naturally as most Attuned, once they know where to look - and even her wild and startled reaction cannot prompt a laugh from the grieving woman. A small twitch of the lips more grimace than smile steals across her face.
She changes, deciding on her hawk form lest the woman’s unicorn-instincts fear the more predatory mountain lion. Its okay Phoebe. You did it. Hold still, it’ll take some time to adjust to your new body and you don’t want to fall. And by the way - you’re a unicorn. And it’s the last straw, that reminder of the companion she has lost. In this form, connected as they are, Hotaru’s walls turn to little more than dust and debris. And Phoebe will feel it - all of it - seasons of grief and loss; Sunjata, Nate, Atlas. The stress of Halo, of Safrin’s judgement, Noah and Deimos’ absence. Remi and the twins, and the shame and loneliness that eats like a slow acid at her soul. And then the blackness - the depression, the desire for it all to end. It is all there, cloying up the bond like a miasmic concoction of sensations and emotions. Dragging Phoebe down with her unintentionally into the pit she’d been living in for seasons.
I'm ready to hope, swing me out of the low
Wide awake in the glow, I can't do it alone
Wide awake in the glow, I can't do it alone
