Hotaru
"You are already the greatest thing in the world to one person. You don't need to keep proving yourself worthy of love, Jata," she whispers into his skin, grieving for that boy he used to be, the one that she can still see in him so easily now. "You've sacrificed so much already. None of us were born to be something. Would you expect Kamaria to be something just because she is Safrin's daughter?" Hotaru has had to teach herself many lessons in this same way. Would she expect these things of her children? Say the types of things she thinks about herself aloud to them? And sometimes, she has to look back at the girl she used to be, naive and foolish and so very in need of love that never came, and try to see her in that same tender light. It isn't easy, because self-loathing never is, but they have to try.
As the rigidity and tension eases from him, his gratitude rumbling against her cheek, Ru tries to rejoice in having done something right. Instead, all she can focus on is the way his hand slows to a stop, the trickles of hesitation and doubt on his side of the bond. She smiles against his collar where he can feel it, if only to trick him, because if he were to see her eyes she knows he wouldn't buy it. "It's okay," she whispers, refusing to let her voice choke up and instead keeping it to an even keen. One hand rises to gently grab his by the wrist, removing it slowly from her skin and folding their hands together - fingers not intertwined intentionally, but holding on all the same. I understand, she tries to say in actions alone. "Just...just sleep, Sunjata." She will be his guardian tonight, keeping him from the brink, guiding him away from paths he shouldn't trod. For him, she will forsake her selfish nature.
As the rigidity and tension eases from him, his gratitude rumbling against her cheek, Ru tries to rejoice in having done something right. Instead, all she can focus on is the way his hand slows to a stop, the trickles of hesitation and doubt on his side of the bond. She smiles against his collar where he can feel it, if only to trick him, because if he were to see her eyes she knows he wouldn't buy it. "It's okay," she whispers, refusing to let her voice choke up and instead keeping it to an even keen. One hand rises to gently grab his by the wrist, removing it slowly from her skin and folding their hands together - fingers not intertwined intentionally, but holding on all the same. I understand, she tries to say in actions alone. "Just...just sleep, Sunjata." She will be his guardian tonight, keeping him from the brink, guiding him away from paths he shouldn't trod. For him, she will forsake her selfish nature.
But I am just a broken machine
And I do things that I don't really mean
And I do things that I don't really mean
