[Training] try to find if it was worth what you spent

i heard you say that you've lost, you've lost, you've lost, you've lost your way

There’s only a bit of the fading high of their battle that courses between them, that lures him in closer, that has him drifting toward her again and again despite knowing what happened before, despite knowing what kind of destruction she’d wrought upon his life. And yet, danger was something Sunjata couldn’t avoid – the constant drive of self sacrifice, the constant need to be the one to fall on top of the live grenade.

Perhaps she is his grenade right now – he doesn’t have the benefit of claiming he’s drunk to make the decisions he has coursing through his mind. After all, she hasn’t pulled away and instead she’s grown closer, and Sunjata’s goosebumps remain even as the water heats up around him again, the flush coursing up and down his neck and chest. He offers his teasing taunt in response to her own, unable to keep himself from pressing his forehead against hers, against closing his eyes and pretending.

Her voice is like a song on the wind, despite the terrible things it makes for his punishment. And in reality? He knows the worst one. He’s choosing the worst one.

He just doesn’t know whether he should say it audibly or not. He doesn’t know if he should tell her it’s a punishment for him as much as it is for her. And for the first time he keeps his thoughts to himself, his fingers twitching at her sides as he decides and shivers as he pauses to cut her off when she trails off.

There’s a hint of a whine that leaves him, just barely there but one she’d likely hear with how close they are, as if he’s fighting with himself away from it and in the end succumbing regardless. He sinks in toward her, cutting her off as he presses his lips to hers, as he tears open that wound once again to let it bleed.

What better punishment than this?

but i don't think you had much to lose, that house was never built for you

SUNJATA