She swallowed hard. Then swallowed again, and again. But the lump in her throat did not go away, and no matter how much she blinked the tears still burned in her eyes. Pale cheeks flashed with the effort to hold back; the heat in her face made Maea feel even worse, knowing how intense the color was in her, how blotchy and uneven the flush would be. No matter hon much she wished it, hers was not a face that could hide emotions. Whether it was joy or sorrow, fear or pleasure, everything was out there for anyone to see.
It made her feel so weak. For attracting their sympathies, for having no choice but to accept the help, for not being able to manage on her own. She was grateful, truly she was, and Sam's comment on teaching him something in return for her lessons did help. It was just... Maea wanted to be stronger than this. Just once, she wished she would not have to ask others to help her. Or be forced to accept it as it was offered.
"Thank you. Both of you. I... whatever help I can get will be most appreciated" she said, voice quiet and still not entirely steady. All this time she had kept her face turned away, but with a deep breath and a quick, almost angry gesture she wiped a few stray tears from the cheeks and turned back to the work at hand.
"Tell me, how much has the guild managed to find out about this place? The barrier, the Spire... There are rumors flying about everywhere, and I saw a notice about an attempt at entering the Spire?"
Maea hoped that changing the topic would break the dark mood the had brought upon them, perhaps give her some time to regain composure. Though they were kind she was not comfortable throwing her innermost thoughts out for them to see... Not yet. Crying before then was pointless, and there was too much work to be done to waste time in pointless things.
It made her feel so weak. For attracting their sympathies, for having no choice but to accept the help, for not being able to manage on her own. She was grateful, truly she was, and Sam's comment on teaching him something in return for her lessons did help. It was just... Maea wanted to be stronger than this. Just once, she wished she would not have to ask others to help her. Or be forced to accept it as it was offered.
"Thank you. Both of you. I... whatever help I can get will be most appreciated" she said, voice quiet and still not entirely steady. All this time she had kept her face turned away, but with a deep breath and a quick, almost angry gesture she wiped a few stray tears from the cheeks and turned back to the work at hand.
"Tell me, how much has the guild managed to find out about this place? The barrier, the Spire... There are rumors flying about everywhere, and I saw a notice about an attempt at entering the Spire?"
Maea hoped that changing the topic would break the dark mood the had brought upon them, perhaps give her some time to regain composure. Though they were kind she was not comfortable throwing her innermost thoughts out for them to see... Not yet. Crying before then was pointless, and there was too much work to be done to waste time in pointless things.
