Maea
Rest against my pillow
like the aging winter sun
like the aging winter sun
His response came slowly at first, measured and thoughtful. Maea remained where she was and lightened quietly, her entire being still and focused on the thoughts he chose to offer her. In essence, it wasn't really anything different from what he had told her before. Just as her own words had been more of the same. And she didn't know why, but they resounded differently within her this time. Maybe it was his tone, for once entirely free of anger or resentment. Perhaps it was simply something in herself that finally listened.
Or maybe it was just that simple acknowledgement at the end that reset the bones of a break unable to heal on its own, as long as splinters kept cutting the wrong way. Selfish as it was, Maea needed to hear it, that she mattered. That hate and resentment wasn't everything she had left behind.
For a while she merely stood there and let his words sink in. Settle deep, even after he had grown silent. The ache they left was different, somehow. A little sweeter. Not as bitter. And although a dampness left an eerie sheen rimming her eyes, she... smiled. Sad and lonely and resigned, but relieved too. She let out a sigh and it turned into a breathless huff of laughter - just a beat, just two - and her hand came up to wiped the fluid from her cheek as it overflowed.
"Thank you. I think... I needed to hear that. I'm - I'm glad you finally found your right one. I'm glad you're getting him back. I - thank you."
Overwhelmed, she didn't quite know what to do with herself. Faux tears kept rising in her eyes and she wiped at them until both her hands and cheeks glistened with that opalescent shimmer. Not a trace of the impassive mask remained; an impulse har her hand reaching for the man by the water's edge, who had been the center of her world for so long. Just for a moment - then she caught herself and let it drop back to her side.
Because that was the essence of all this, wasn't it? He was not for her to lean on anymore. And she had to find a way to live with that.
Or maybe it was just that simple acknowledgement at the end that reset the bones of a break unable to heal on its own, as long as splinters kept cutting the wrong way. Selfish as it was, Maea needed to hear it, that she mattered. That hate and resentment wasn't everything she had left behind.
For a while she merely stood there and let his words sink in. Settle deep, even after he had grown silent. The ache they left was different, somehow. A little sweeter. Not as bitter. And although a dampness left an eerie sheen rimming her eyes, she... smiled. Sad and lonely and resigned, but relieved too. She let out a sigh and it turned into a breathless huff of laughter - just a beat, just two - and her hand came up to wiped the fluid from her cheek as it overflowed.
"Thank you. I think... I needed to hear that. I'm - I'm glad you finally found your right one. I'm glad you're getting him back. I - thank you."
Overwhelmed, she didn't quite know what to do with herself. Faux tears kept rising in her eyes and she wiped at them until both her hands and cheeks glistened with that opalescent shimmer. Not a trace of the impassive mask remained; an impulse har her hand reaching for the man by the water's edge, who had been the center of her world for so long. Just for a moment - then she caught herself and let it drop back to her side.
Because that was the essence of all this, wasn't it? He was not for her to lean on anymore. And she had to find a way to live with that.
Only wake each morning to
remember that you're gone
remember that you're gone
