General's Orders, Captain's Duty

Roana swallowed and looked up first, seeing Safrin standing there. She was more beautiful than she remembered, though she had been terribly distracted before. And oh, so melancholy. The goddess was almost painful to behold in her grief. But she did as the goddess bid, and rose, gritting her teeth against the discomfort the movement caused. Unlike others - men really - Roana always did her best to hide her discomfort in situations like this. Where she had been raised, she should not be where she was, who she was. She was supposed to have been a dainty trophy wife to a high ranking, wealthy man. Instead she chose to fight, but she couldn't just enlist. She had to prove her worth. She had had to be better, faster, stronger, smarter than the average recruit. She had to maintain a perfect cool, pragmatic, strategic, precise to perfection. And for years, she had excelled at it. She had loved it...and then she had loved. She detoured and married and had children and let herself slip. And it was that slip, that moment of weakness and inaccuracy, that had cost them Ronin. It should have been me. "Thank you, but I recognize that we have all lost, and are the poorer for it. I...wish I could promise you that I was as charming as the other Ro." she said quietly, voice a little stiff. It was the only outward tell of the roiling emotions she held back. How many times now had she replayed those few seconds in her head? Krosis, blade gleaming, flying true through the air, slicing into the...metal armor beneath the skin of the demon, the bright light beneath it revealed. Her voice trying to lift above the din, her eyes widening, knowing what was to come...and in the end being too slow. It's my fault. If I had just...If I had just...If I had just... Roana stepped forward when bid, her breath catching as literal stars swirrled around her. She was reinvigorated, restored, life brought back to her limbs with such suddenness that she could not remember the last time she had felt so good, so whole, so strong. She swallowed tears of guilt that immediately threatened her perfect cool. "I am undeserving of your kindness, Safrin." she said quietly. It was not said to be humble, but because she thought it true. roana The soul that sees beauty may sometimes walk alone