RORY
i told the stars about you
The change was instantaneous: one moment, unguarded and amused, the next, cold and tense and exuding wariness. It was just like in the bakery, except this time, there had been no outburst to trigger it, no need to look for the danger (He deserved it, honestly; the last couple of times he'd opened his mouth in public it had been to decry the Outlanders and their influence. Their initiative. "Ah," he responded sadly when Deimos wished him a happy Fiat Lux, as if the response had somehow explained everything. And it sort of did: was Rory going to have another anti-Outlander outburst? Was he going to chase Deimos from the festival? He let his gaze fall to the side.
He wasn't going to do any of those things. In fact, the most immediate thing he did was droop a little, shoulders sagging as his faint, foolish hope to find things alright between them was crushed beneath the glacial reception.
It wasn't like he had genuinely expected anything else, but—it could still hurt, couldn't it? Even if it was all his fault?
I'm sorry if I ruined it for you was on his tongue, but he swallowed the words, looking into his beer tankard as if it would somehow hold the answers. He could just pour it all down his throat and get another and another and another until he had drunk his misery away and passed out and he'd keep doing it and doing it, over and over—
He wanted to say yes but he couldn't, not quite yet, not honestly. Instead he made a noncommittal noise and took a sip of the beer by way of response.
He had words, but not words to respond to that.
"I think," he said, slow and measured, letting his blue eyes flit up again. Searching Deimos's face. Watching for his reaction, if there would be any; his heart seemed deeply hidden behind layers upon layers of armor and protective ice. "I have some apologies to make, and explanations to offer. About.. about what I've said and done, lately."
If you even want to hear them he didn't add, but it hung between them as he watched Deimos for an indication of whether he wanted to listen, or if Rory should just take his leave.
