[RA] gasping for air

DEIMOS

“I can make it work,” he proceeded with a sort of juvenile, defiant air that settled back into his brows with a determined, furrowed line; eternally beckoning any sense of challenge. The suds worked their way through the smooth, silken threads of her hair, and before long he’d opted to coordinate them into buns on either side of her head, tilting this way and that to give it a practiced, studied air. Thereafter though, he opted to simply soak and rinse the strands first, the gentle coaxing of water sliding through his hands, warm and quiet, cleaning and dissipating any remains of that day’s infirmary visits or collisions with Erebos’ flailing favors.

It was easier to concentrate on her; tending, mending, soothing, than wiling away the particulars of the Forsaken’s latest visit. A cataclysm of change or cycles or something he couldn’t quite explain; because forgiveness never settled well in his ribcage and he was always content to damn those who’d wounded and wronged. He’d left her uncertain too, so he sighed, proceeded in the way Noah had initially. “Came to tell me Cordelia had been killed by a white dragon. That was where he had been for so many seasons. Hunting it down.” His words came on a more muted rumble; never quite sure where to place his grief. She’d been a friend, and she’d been a coward, and somewhere in between remained everything else.

Not intending to leave it there, he sighed, letting the motions pilfer away into the bath air; cool and refract off into the distance, tenderly plucking at her crimson threads until they seemed free of the shampoo. “He apologized for taking his anger out on me. And I am aware that we were far better friends and allies, and that I would try, but I am not good at overlooking everything he did.”

who we were before bones, before dirt, before even light
we have always been deep, restless souls

EVIE

there ain't no doubt in no ones mind

It’s perhaps the strangest sensation she’s ever experienced, and laughter ekes out here and there as her hair is manipulated, sudsed, and eventually artfully designed into sleek buns on the sides of her head. “I am genuinely impressed you could do that, but now I want you to always do it.” Though she’d miss the feeling of his hands far too much and she knows it. Half the reason she keeps her hair so long is to luxuriate in the moments when he plays with it - even though she’d debated chopping it during Erebos’ grabbing phase. 

She wishes the world would leave them alone more often than it does - which is just about never - because the simple domesticity of the moment is so precious that it leaves all the greater an ache as it slips away. Though she feels a touch of shame at her selfishness in feeling that as Noah’s own grief and loss is held up like a mirror against it. 

Evie is perhaps the most conflicted of anyone to hear of Cordelia’s death. She’d risked everything in her attempt to reach the woman and heal her that fateful day of the siege on the wall, only to watch her retreating figure as she ran away, leaving Evie to kill the banshee queen with only Talyson at her side - someone she didn’t think she could trust to watch her back. The betrayal of it had carved out a hollow piece inside her toward the woman, though she’d never let it change how she’d interacted with her in the brief, civil passings they’d had thereafter. But to know she is dead…and to know that she leaves behind a devoted husband who will mourn her eternally, and two children who will struggle to recall her face and voice for how young they are still…it inspires a secondhand, empathetic grief that she has far too much experience with. The Grounds had provided more than its fair share of that feeling in her lifetime. 

“Neither am I,” she admits quietly, watching her crimson hair slip over his wet fingers but not truly seeing it. “Though we’re both rather known for holding grudges.” Even after all the work she’s done to try and uproot it in herself it’s hard to remove something that had once also been a defense mechanism. “You don’t have to be the same kind of friends though. You can plant new seeds in razed soil and still grow something, even if it won’t be the same as what you had before.” Plant analogies spring eternal with the Evergreen, but it’s easier than attempting to rely on lived experience she simply doesn’t have. Her friend list has never exceeded a number greater than three at one time. “Trying doesn’t have to mean overlooking. You aren’t the type, and I hope he’d know that.” Though, given the incidents that had set the two apart, maybe she shouldn’t give that sort of credit. “But if he seems to want it too, and you’re willing to at least try, maybe you can rebuild something even if it won’t be as close or as trusting.”

that love's the finest thing around

Table by Sky!

DEIMOS

His smile was soft, indulgently boyish instead of in those juvenile and mischievous complexities; equally tired, perhaps, and adrift in the ease of these moments and everything outside those walls. “Mm. Some new routine?” Something to be savored and honed? He cast his hand away from the strands thereafter, surveying and studying and finding everything right and whole – before he began snagging at other portions of the water, cupping them within his palms, and instead of dropping it unceremoniously on her, began to place it upon his own head and scalp.

Wetting his own long strands down gave him a moment to think, listen, and ponder. Evie had her own musings over Cordelia – of which were understandable ministrations; had she not been so quick to rally within those days after the war, the Sword would have likely committed some horrendous acts – but there’d been greater aches and pains. The One Shot carried the monicker for thereafter; and in combination with the Forsaken, must have felt like a strange, rattled, addled pair after everything. But he didn’t want the foolishness to sting in the thereafter now; no sense in carrying the aftertaste of bitterness when she wasn’t even on this plain any longer.

Evie’s grudges combined with his own could be testy things though – Maea and Hadama had learned firsthand, and though he’d rarely, if ever, deign to talk to the former, he had to work with the latter. Noah was a complex issue – once so soundly relied upon, and now, Deimos was never quite certain what the man was going to do – to either ally or enemy. His head tilted, dripping water and musing over her own proclamations, before heaving another sigh. “No, I do not think I could ever fully trust him again.” Not after his issues with the Grounds and Danta, not after nearly killing an entire group of people on the Torchline beach – the offenses ran in vicious, unwinding circles, and he couldn’t, wouldn’t, forgo everything just to give multitudes of chances. “We will see, I suppose.” Granting another sigh, he pilfered through the rest – ultimately settling into nothing but a larger smile for her. “That is enough of my drama.” Besides Starfall, which was its own parallel collision course. “Any new gossip for you?”

who we were before bones, before dirt, before even light
we have always been deep, restless souls

EVIE

there ain't no doubt in no ones mind

This ensuing laugh is quieter, more fond. “I think we can always stand to make new rituals, don’t you?” Anything that can sow these positive feelings throughout their lives, tiny seeds that grow a reliable network of roots below the surface.

There’s too much to mull over in the moment to immediately reach to help him in his own ministrations, but she turns eventually to guide his hands away from his dark hair to replace them with her own. Moving close, close enough that their foreheads nearly touch, as she gently massages her fingertips into his scalp. “That’s all we can do - wait and see. Our own small efforts aside.” Not to carry the burden entirely upon their shoulders, but to still make some small, active effort in the name of sincerity and the holding of their word. 

Pressing an idle kiss to his forehead as he relieves them both of the topic, Evie shakes her head with a wry, helpless smile. “Truly nothing to report. I’m a bit restless - Flowerbirth always makes me that way. But I’m trying to work through it.” To not burden him with aimless, abstract thoughts and desires until they have coalesced into something actionable.

that love's the finest thing around

Table by Sky!

DEIMOS

Her hands were within his hair before he could respond; and he lowered his down to rest elsewhere; the soft lull of her calves nearby, under the surface. He leaned into her touch immediately, as one might a flame, snorting in response. “I suppose,” was a rough, but joking rumble as he pressed his brow into hers, a gentle sigh unfurling. Burdens made better – maybe – just by being around those who didn’t place further ones upon him – safe, quiet, tranquil sanctuaries nestled in their own home; away and away and away from so many other spinning things.

Purposefully angling his breath so it maneuvered her hair, his brows knitted together at her response – already peering probably far too into it. He understood the nature of restlessness; it was in his bones each and every day – that incessant and insatiable need to act upon something - deeply engrained from childhood onward. But Deimos also wouldn’t presume hers to be the same as his own, so instead of already driving onward into possibilities and parameters, he’d learned to simply ask. His mouth moved to her nose, a light kiss while she either opted to unpack her thoughts or leave them aside. “In what way?”

who we were before bones, before dirt, before even light
we have always been deep, restless souls

EVIE

there ain't no doubt in no ones mind

She presses her forehead back into his, willing and ready to support him in all ways, from the slight weight of his own brow against hers to more abstract things such as his tentative restructuring of his relationship with Noah. There will be many uncertain elements and changes to come and she will be his shoulder and guide in whatever ways he needs. Even if only as a receptacle for his venting or confusion.

He kisses her nose gently, and it crinkles slightly with the smile the motion pulls from her. “I’m not sure yet. Or, I have a general idea but I think I’m being pulled two ways and I don’t know which is calling me more.” Or which is ‘right’, if there is ever a right way to follow your heart. Not when neither offers a sense or requirement of duty or obligation. “So I would be worried about - I don’t know, getting your hopes up or you having an opinion towards one or the other and then I don’t pick it?” Or if his preference sways her, because she loves him so much that she’d want to give more weight to whichever he’d seem to prefer. “I think I just need more hemming and hawing time.” Her shoulders shiver with quiet laughter. 

“My own plans and life desires aren’t exactly world-changing let’s be honest. But what about Halo - it’s about time to consider the season’s goals, right? It would be nice to make a decisive choice on something today with all these grey-area things we’re both going through.” It would give her something to mark off without an endless, uncertain horizon of potentially days or weeks or entire seasons of trying to figure out something you can only know the end of by finally feeling it. Just as with Deimos and Noah only figuring out the new shape of their relationship by feeling it out day by day with no end goal in sight.

that love's the finest thing around

Table by Sky!

DEIMOS

He watched very carefully beneath layers of wet hair and droplets; always a keen observer. Her hesitation caused him to grow only slightly still – perhaps hallmarks of her last announcement, and the uncertainty behind it caused a brow to arch, head tilting as she meandered around the subject. With nothing definitive it was all ether and air, naught for him to pull, and so he joked, granting another boyish grin. “Me? Sway you?” Though he had his opinions, both were stubborn individuals – he liked to believe they balanced one another out when it came to quite a few notions and thoughts, often agreeing on multitudes. But Evie had frequently been steadfast in her beliefs, and he hadn’t deigned to alter them. Save for her penchant on monster riding.

At her insistence on shying away from the notions, at least until something was more finite, he let the subject fade, no intending to pursue until it she had something more definite. Halo itself was always a topic of concern, and so while his hands reached towards her hips, dragging her closer to his frame, he pondered out loud. “Given everything the region has gone through lately, I would not mind another regional upgrade. But, resource harvesting might be a thought – since King’s End was open to trade, and that would alleviate the only parts we have gathered.” Nor would he ever decline soldiers in training – so he smirked back at her, lobbing the potential in her corner once more.

who we were before bones, before dirt, before even light
we have always been deep, restless souls

EVIE

there ain't no doubt in no ones mind

It’s a fair assessment, and it surprises a bark of a laugh out of her that echoes a little too loudly within their bathroom walls to hide that. “You’re right - but wait, isn’t that you swaying me? Changing my mind?” Her grin goes Cheshire, mischief brewing after - admittedly much needed - moments of repose and vulnerability. The way he pulls her closer admittedly makes it even harder to resist. Evie may have been the one to change the topic, but now she’d rather close this up quickly so she can change it again. Hopefully to something that won’t rely on words much at all. 

“We have upgrades planned with the springs, I’d be more inclined to say trade materials. Especially with the incomplete stores we already have.” Restless heat curls under her skin, prompting her to wrap her arms around his neck to twirl his hair in her fingers. Her nose slides down his, eyes half-lidded. “There, narrowed it to two. Your turn. Quickly, if you please.” Evie will confidently back either resources or training, and frankly she is happy to stamp her approval on an unseen paper if it means he’ll kiss her faster. Halo certainly wouldn’t suffer from either choice, but the Evergreen will suffer if her husband doesn’t give her some much needed attention.

that love's the finest thing around

Table by Sky!

DEIMOS

“Maybe,” he grinned – though he still wouldn’t admit to any chicanery or duplicity afoot; Evie was very much her own person, and capable of free thought one way or another. Besides, there were other things to brew and coincide upon, if her eyes gave off particular significance.

Thoroughly amused now, he nodded. “That is fine.” Quick and sharp decisions for Halo at large – upgrades coming on the newest inclination of hot springs endeavors, and potential for future trade on the horizon. Then they could pay attention to one another again, if either of them had anything to say about it. So the Sword made certain to grant all his focus on the present – something he figured both could agree and be swayed to.

[FIN]

who we were before bones, before dirt, before even light
we have always been deep, restless souls