sky turned black like a perfect storm

Sohalia

What am I doing?

The Luminary paused in the shadow of the City Gates, slipping out of the stream of people entering Stormbreak to lean against a nearby wall. Not for the first time, she wished that it wasn't the height of Longheat - if it had been colder, she might have managed to get away with a cloak or something that could hide her face. As it was, she felt horribly exposed, and her nerves were getting the better of her. Every time a stranger looked her way, she felt her heart jump into her throat. What if the Family found her? What if she was captured again?

But she'd had to come. She had to see for herself how her home had changed - or not. By all accounts, there wasn't much difference in the day-to-day life of most of Stormbreak's inhabitants. While Soh was relieved that things hadn't gotten worse since her disappearance, so too was she unhappy that things hadn't gotten better. She'd had such big plans for the region in the time before; now, she wasn't sure where she stood, or what she wanted, or how to move forward.

At this moment, though, moving forward looked like taking one step toward the Gates: one step, and then another, and then another, until at last she found herself in Stormbreak's borders for the first time in seasons.

Minor powerplay allowed without permission.
Feel free to use force/magic on Sohalia.

So tired trying to see from behind the red in my eyes
No better version of me I could pretend to be tonight

"What are you doing?"

Koa's voice is a hiss of alarm, his hand on Soh's upper arm as tight as a vice. He'd been patrolling when he saw her, and while at first he thought it must be a mistake (how many times before had he thought he'd spotted her, walking down these very streets?), a quick blink and a rub of his eyes confirmed that, no, this was not in his head.

He hadn't paused to think or plan, reacting only on instinct. Beelining toward her, heart in his throat, he'd wrapped his hand around her too-slim arm and tugged her into the nearest alley, leaving no room for her to protest. Now he turns her around to face him, alarm written clearly on his handsome face. He's rougher than he needs to be, his hands shaking on her biceps, his voice trembling as he speaks. "What are you thinking? It isn't safe for you here." He glances over his shoulder as he says it, as though perhaps Dahlia might have manifested behind him like some sort of terribly beautiful ghost.

Koa

No other version of me I would rather be tonight
And, Lord, she found me just in time

Sohalia

Just when Soh had found her courage, it departed in a gasp as a hand grasped her arm like a vice, dragging her into a nearby alley. The girl opened her mouth to scream - and then she saw the familiar tan skin and dark hair, and a sigh of relief fell from her lips. "Gods, Koa! You scared me half to death!" she scolded, her heart still beating too quickly in her chest.

As Koa surveyed the alley, Soh's gaze followed his, confirming with her own eyes that they were alone. The Dragoon still held her by the biceps, and she wasn't sure if she should be glad or furious by his sudden show of concern. Of course, she'd known that he cared - to some extent, anyway - from the knowledge that he'd looked for her after her kidnapping. But their last meeting had been... cold? Distant? Uncomfortable, certainly, in a way that she couldn't quite identify.

And yes, Koa, she knew that it was potentially dangerous to come back. But surely, surely he was, in at least some small way, pleased? Surely he'd be proud that she'd gained the courage she needed to brave Stormbreak's streets once more, despite the danger and despite the Family and despite everything? But no. If anything, he seemed... angry.

Dismayed and offended, Soh drew herself up. It was rare for the girl to snap, but she did so now: "It's not safe for me anywhere." Except, perhaps, in Halo or Torchline, but that was neither here nor there. "Or should I keep hiding forever?" she demanded, her voice a hiss. Stormbreak was her home. Sure, she might not know what she wanted to do with her life, whether she wanted to return to her former position, but that shouldn't prevent her from returning to her little apartment above the little shop that she missed so desperately.

Minor powerplay allowed without permission.
Feel free to use force/magic on Sohalia.

So tired trying to see from behind the red in my eyes
No better version of me I could pretend to be tonight

Were Koa Attuned his ears might have flattened as Sohalia snaps and bares her teeth. "Especially here," he barks back sharply, head jerking back from where he's been surveying the entrance to the alleyway. No, she shouldn't hide forever - but it isn't safe, and that's the point, and he doesn't want to see her hurt.

But of course he doesn't say that, not in a helpful way. Instead he shifts his grip upon her, hands firm and unyielding upon her skin, his body shielding her from view. Finally focusing back on Soh, Koa scans her for sign of injury, his copper gaze grazing across pale arms, up a slender collar, to a face so close that he can make out her pores, to eyes the color of a summer sky--

Alarm bells ring in Koa's thoughts, and he drops her as though she were made of molten metal, taking a hasty, backwards step. "Sorry, I- fuck, Soh." Smooth. Suave. Running a hand through his hair, Koa tries to collect his thoughts. He hadn't gotten so close last he saw her, and now the sight of clear blue eyes framed by errant locks of blonde has further destabilized his youthful resolve. "I just- what if someone else had seen you?" Sure, they hadn't given two shits about him returning, but he wasn't a Queen.

Koa

No other version of me I would rather be tonight
And, Lord, she found me just in time

Sohalia

She probably shouldn't have snapped. After all, Koa was only trying to look out for her. A part of her wondered why - if he was trying to protect her as a friend, or if there was more that still lingered beneath the surface. She'd never quite deciphered what they were to each other, not after everything had happened with Jude, and her disappearance had only made the waters murkier. If she was honest with herself, she wasn't even sure what she wanted from him - so she could hardly expect him to know what he wanted from her.

Except, apparently, for her to stay safe. And that, at least, she could understand well enough.

The fire left her eyes as he released her, hastily taking a step away from her as though she'd burned him. Which she supposed she had - several times, in fact. Her heart ached at the distance, at the awkwardness she felt in the gap between them. "It's fine," she said, quick to forgive and forget. She reached up to rub her forehead, where a headache was starting to form. Maybe Koa was right. Maybe this had been a bad idea.

"I just wanted to see for myself," she offered by way of explanation. "Everyone told me things were okay here, but..." But it was hard to believe. The Family ruled, and there were Void creatures everywhere, and it was all a mess. And yet, as Soh peered around Koa to the bustling city beyond their alleyway, she realized that the others had told the truth. There was little evidence of the Family's presence that she could discern. Maybe it was different further in the city.

"What would you have done?" she asked softly, returning her silver gaze to Koa. "If you were me. What would you do?"

Minor powerplay allowed without permission.
Feel free to use force/magic on Sohalia.

So tired trying to see from behind the red in my eyes
No better version of me I could pretend to be tonight

The fire leaves her as quickly as it rose, catching Koa more than a little by surprise. Relieved - the last thing they needed was to cause a scene, to get more attention on the exiled Queen - Koa lets his shoulders drop a smidge, some of the tension easing off his bones.

Releasing a quiet sigh, Koa tries not to focus on the sharpness of her face, the new lines illness and neglect have etched beneath her eyes. "They are" he agrees with a tight grimace, glancing again to the bustling street. "Dahlia rarely leaves her tower, and Ever is her infected lap dog, and Anju is absent more than not- but yeah, things are okay." The bitterness that coats his voice has no immediately clear source. It's hard to say what irks Koa more: the foreign occupation of his home, or how little impact it's actually had. In the absence of any real revolution, Stormbreak has become eerily still. Sure, the Family isn't killing them in the street, but that hardly means people feel free.

The uncertainty sets Koa' teeth on edge, forces electricity through his blood.

What would he do? That's an easier question to answer, because it's something he's already done. "Get stuck in a swamp for seasons. Stay in Torchline for a while. Then eventually grow the balls to come back, only to realize that I mean so little, the Family didn't notice at all?" Wry bitterness sours the words; his smile holds no mirth.

Though, again, what do you want, Koa? Cus it sounds like maybe you're a little salty you didn't warrant a smiting. Which is exceptionally dumb, and thus not out of character for you.

Arcing a brow and tilting his head, he meets Soh's gaze again. "What was your plan? If it had been someone loyal to them who found you, instead of me?"

Koa

No other version of me I would rather be tonight
And, Lord, she found me just in time

Sohalia

Koa, it seemed, was angry. Who or what he was angry at, exactly, Soh wasn't sure. Dahlia? Ever? Or was he angry at her, for being the reason that all of it had happened in the first place? Soh couldn't blame him if he was. Despite her friends' best efforts, and despite the slow healing of the festering wound of her guilt, she still felt like there must have been something she could have done. If she'd been stronger, less naive, something. Then maybe none of this would have happened.

But even if she still thought that things should have gone differently, Tal and Flora and Lena had all insisted that it wasn't her fault, that had she fought back, she might have died. And she knew, deep down, that if a demigod couldn't take on the Family and win, then she'd have had no chance at all. So instead of being cowed by Koa's bitterness, she simply remained silently, regarding him coolly, unsure what to say or how to help.

Then he turned his attention back to her, coming out of whatever dark place it seemed he'd gone. And that was almost worse, because in truth, she didn't have a plan. She'd just wanted to see home, just once, before she went off looking for lilies and taking time to herself to recover from her ordeal. And she'd just thought, if the Family had released her, then surely they wouldn't be looking to kidnap her again, that maybe a quick look would be worth the risk.

"Then I would have faced the consequences," she said honestly. Maybe it was stupid, but it was the only thing she could have done. "But they let me go. If they wanted to hurt me, they could have a hundred times over. I'm clearly not a threat to them." And this time, it was Soh's voice that was tinged with bitterness, because hadn't the same thing basically happened to her as happened to Koa?

Minor powerplay allowed without permission.
Feel free to use force/magic on Sohalia.

So tired trying to see from behind the red in my eyes
No better version of me I could pretend to be tonight

Would this be going any better, were Koa not still reeling from his recent heartbreak, deep enough into his Emo Era that he's considered floppy bangs? Would they have fallen back into each other's arms, have said things like I missed you, and I'm glad you're safe, and I don't want to lose you again, that's why I'm scared, rather than maintaining this bitter façade?

Maybe - but alas, that's not the situation. Timing never seems to be on Soh and Koa's side.

Again Koa shoots her a sharp glance, appalled at how little she values her life. "Just because they spared you once, doesn't mean they would again." Dropping his arm, the young Dragoon fidgets unhappily with the buckles of his starlit bracers, acutely aware of how little he could do in the face of the Family, should they come for Sohalia once more.

"It's not that I don't want you home, Soh." Looking up, Koa forces himself to meet her silver eyes, ignoring the ache they stir in his chest. "I just... if they did try to stop you, or gods forbid, hurt you--" His voice catches in his throat; he has to look away. Does he have the right to tell her that he can't lose her again? Does it even matter, when she was never his to lose?

"It's just not safe," he finishes flatly, copper gaze sliding from her face once more.

Koa

No other version of me I would rather be tonight
And, Lord, she found me just in time

Sohalia

Perhaps she'd been too hasty in her rush to come home. Perhaps Koa was right, and she had placed herself in unnecessary danger. After all, she might be a little depressed, but she was hardly suicidal, and she hadn't set out to taunt the Family into taking her again, or hurting her, or worse. She'd truly thought she was beneath their notice, that no one would even realize she'd been to the city before she slipped away again.

And though timing was never on their side, it sort of was - after all, what were the odds that Koa would see her trying to come home, that he would care enough to pull her aside, chastise her for her stupidity? Because that's how Soh chose to see it. Bitter though he was, he had to care, at least a little, or he'd have let her go into Stormbreak without a second thought. Right?

Not that she thought he cared for her that way, not anymore. And she wasn't sure what she felt for him, either, so the thought that maybe there would never again be anything between them didn't sting quite so badly as it used to. But she wouldn't object to friendship. To maybe getting rid of this awful awkwardness that seemed determined to lurk in the distance between them. So when her heart did a little flip-flop as his copper gaze met hers, she was able to push it aside. Was she lying to herself? Maybe. We'll just have to see.

Soh bit her lip. "Koa..." she started, but she wasn't sure what to say, how to reassure him that everything would be fine. Because she couldn't promise that, not after everything. So she stopped herself, looked away, cleared her throat. "Look, I can just... leave," she offered. "I - if everything is okay here - or at least as okay as it can be - that's all I wanted to know. I don't - I can go." Maybe that would be better. Easier.

But maybe, just maybe... maybe she could stay long enough to try and mend things between them. Maybe he'd want her to.

Minor powerplay allowed without permission.
Feel free to use force/magic on Sohalia.

So tired trying to see from behind the red in my eyes
No better version of me I could pretend to be tonight

Thing is, he doesn't want her to leave - but nor does he want her to stay. Truth be told, it's been a very long time since Koa knew what he wanted from Sohalia, a history of contradictions which has not been ironed out by the difficult nature of the past year.

"That's not--" he starts, but doesn't finish, words dying with a frustrated shake of his head. It didn't used to be this hard to talk to people, Koa thinks. Right and wrong and love and heartbreak used to be so easy to identify, crystalized choices on a sign-posted path. Now the boy has no idea where to go from here, how to help Soh without hurting her, how to be kind without hurting himself.

Gnawing hard at his lower lips, Koa lets out a sigh. "You don't have to leave, just... can we at least get out of the street?" Even tucked in an alley he feels exposed, like the Vox might manifest behind his shoulder and pluck Soh away with not-quite-arms. "We can go to the Nest, or the Celestine, or even my house - or, or wherever you were heading," he's quick to add, realizing, belatedly, that Soh's purpose for coming back to Stormbreak had absolutely nothing to to with him.

Koa

No other version of me I would rather be tonight
And, Lord, she found me just in time

Sohalia

One of these days, Koa and Soh will get their shit sorted out we hope. One of these days, things won't be awkward and tense and uncomfortable anymore. They'll be able to interact with at least a modicum of normalcy.

Today, however, was not that day.

Whatever Koa started to say was interrupted by a frustrated shake of the head, and Soh bit her lip to keep the irritated retort from her own lips. What did he want from her? First he wanted her to leave, and that, at least, she could understand. He may not want to keep her safe from any personal feelings, and that was fine - but he was a Dragoon, and it was his job to keep the peace. That, she understood. But now he wanted her to stay? To stay with him? To go to his house?

The poor girl was hopelessly confused.

"I just... wanted to go to my shop," she said hesitantly. "I wanted to go home. Just... just for a minute." Just to see if it was still standing. To see what kind of shape it was in now. "But that's... probably stupid, isn't it?" After all, wouldn't that be where she was expected to go, if she came back? What if the Family was watching, waiting for her to return?

Minor powerplay allowed without permission.
Feel free to use force/magic on Sohalia.

So tired trying to see from behind the red in my eyes
No better version of me I could pretend to be tonight

If you asked Koa to explain what his thought process is the answer would probably involve a frustrated shrug and the flailing of his arms. An hour ago he would have adamantly dismissed the idea of spending a day with Soh; now that she's here and skulking around Stormbreak, there's no way he's letting her out of his sight. Call it protective instinct, his duty as a Dragoon, a need for self-flagellation, just sheer idiocy - all are correct.

Whatever the reason, she's stuck with him, now.

"Extremely stupid." Once again he's scrubbing his face, but this time his voice is resigned instead of angry, perhaps even brightened by the shade of a laugh. Her shop is exactly where they'd look for her - exactly where he'd looked for her - but if there's one thing Koa understands, it's the instinct to go home. So he doesn't push back any further, simply drops his hands and squares his shoulders, resigned to this strange day. "Alright, let's go. Stay close, yeah? And let me walk on the street side - you'll be less visible, that way."

Koa

No other version of me I would rather be tonight
And, Lord, she found me just in time

Sohalia

Jeez, Koa, way to pull your punches. As the dragoon agreed that her plan had been monumentally stupid, the girl couldn't help the slight wince that crossed her features. She was prepared to suggest anywhere else - or, perhaps, that she just turned around and go back from whence she came - when Koa agreed to accompany her. Her brows rose slightly, her cheeks flushing a faint pink. She hadn't expected this when she'd come to Stormbreak today, and she couldn't decide if she was glad or mortified.

"Are you - are you sure?" she asked hesitantly. "I'm sure you have other things to do, so, you know, you don't have to babysit me." Although the words were perhaps a bit sharp, they were accompanied by a creased brow and a frown that could have been apologetic. "I can go on my own and accept the consequences, if there are any." She didn't bother trying to say she could take care of herself - not when they both knew it was a lie.

Minor powerplay allowed without permission.
Feel free to use force/magic on Sohalia.

So tired trying to see from behind the red in my eyes
No better version of me I could pretend to be tonight

"Keeping people safe is literally my job," Koa points out wryly, raising a brow at Soh. Now that he's committed to this course of action he isn't interested in hearing counterpoints. Though he does frown at her sharp tone, his own eyes narrowing slightly in response. Sure, okay, she might be willing to throw her life away (again), but the Dragoon is involved now, as much as they both may not like that fact. "I can't accept them," he replies simply of her potential consequences, copper gaze lingering on silver for just a beat too long.

But before she has a chance to retort (or he a chance to say something he'll regret), Koa is turning on his heel, heading toward the opening of the alley with inarguable authority of a well-trained soldier. "Look's clear - come on." He gestures for Sohalia to follow, waiting for her to join him before falling into step.

Knowing that they'll both feel and look insanely awkward walking stiffly in silence, Koa clears his throat. "So.... where have you been?"

Koa

No other version of me I would rather be tonight
And, Lord, she found me just in time