// standing, stomping in the damage and the ruins of a slip of tongue //
“Mm, eventually.” Astaroth concludes, still willing to let the conversation die to look back on at a later date. The sentiment is there, though, and he realizes that Danta’s really sacrificing a lot by letting him stay here, this close in proximity, after what’s just happened. Thankfully he can’t think about it much longer because of the hands in his hair, dragging him into a boneless kind of relaxation that has his heavy body becoming quite the weighted blanket on the other man.
The laugh spurs the corners of his lips to lift, snorting as he shrugs a shoulder in response. “Well, I suppose you’ll have to give it another go some other time.” You know, because he’d ruined it entirely with the panic and upset.
He settles into the amusement and relaxation, if Astaroth was a cat he’d certainly be purring right about now even as he hears the apology after the stretch of silence, allowing for Astaroth to shrug a shoulder lightly as if that were answer enough. It isn’t, though. “It isn’t your fault.” That the crows were around so much, that he’d even been attacked by them in the first place. “But it is why my violence was much more… Aggressive, there.” without an outlet to get it out, aggression had become key between sleeping fitfully to hear them and long stretches of hunting in his various shifts at the time. “Everyone just assumed I would improve after Dygra changed me, and I let them believe it.” Because talking about his feelings or traumas certainly wasn’t a thing he was capable of doing back in his cannibal tribe. Nor was it really something he managed to do a lot while in the Climb.
It was easier to ignore and pretend it didn’t exist, to retreat when things got really bad, or not unlike Danta, get pointed toward something that needed a punishment.
The laugh spurs the corners of his lips to lift, snorting as he shrugs a shoulder in response. “Well, I suppose you’ll have to give it another go some other time.” You know, because he’d ruined it entirely with the panic and upset.
He settles into the amusement and relaxation, if Astaroth was a cat he’d certainly be purring right about now even as he hears the apology after the stretch of silence, allowing for Astaroth to shrug a shoulder lightly as if that were answer enough. It isn’t, though. “It isn’t your fault.” That the crows were around so much, that he’d even been attacked by them in the first place. “But it is why my violence was much more… Aggressive, there.” without an outlet to get it out, aggression had become key between sleeping fitfully to hear them and long stretches of hunting in his various shifts at the time. “Everyone just assumed I would improve after Dygra changed me, and I let them believe it.” Because talking about his feelings or traumas certainly wasn’t a thing he was capable of doing back in his cannibal tribe. Nor was it really something he managed to do a lot while in the Climb.
It was easier to ignore and pretend it didn’t exist, to retreat when things got really bad, or not unlike Danta, get pointed toward something that needed a punishment.
Astaroth
// with tragic consequences, i think that we've all made our gravest mistakes //
