Maea
You think killing is hard?
Try healing something. That is hard.
Try healing something. That is hard.
It did flay. Carving slices out of all the layers she had built up around herself over the past year, until the rotten core lay exposed. There selfishness and power hunger and judgement crawled like maggots in putrid flesh, oozing with self-righteousness and forged niceness as a layer to cover up a cold indifference that forgot to consider anyone else before she leaped to action, to conclusion, to finish a sentence before someone else had a chance to.
And there she was, that wretched thing from her nightmares. Drunk on her own power as she slammed a panicked man to the ground, callous in her detached interest as she waited to see how many more times he would get back up before giving in. Satisfied to let someone else deal with the problem she had become, when it hurt too much to touch it herself. It would be nice to have someone by her side, after all, who could just poke her when she strayed and added another layer of defense against her own tendencies, so that if something went wrong she could just blame him.
If all of these things were subconscious tendencies, so what? They had spilled over now, escaped into the physical world and turned her into - yes, a monster. The kind of cruel that she had washed her hands off of so dramatically.
"You are right. That's what I wanted to be... the kind of safe that could actually help him. I want to change. This kind of person... I don't want to be like this anymore. I want to make amends if he would let me. Though I know I have no right to ask, and honestly don't know how. Either way... any punishment he or you would pass for causing harm to him, I will accept it."
And there she was, that wretched thing from her nightmares. Drunk on her own power as she slammed a panicked man to the ground, callous in her detached interest as she waited to see how many more times he would get back up before giving in. Satisfied to let someone else deal with the problem she had become, when it hurt too much to touch it herself. It would be nice to have someone by her side, after all, who could just poke her when she strayed and added another layer of defense against her own tendencies, so that if something went wrong she could just blame him.
If all of these things were subconscious tendencies, so what? They had spilled over now, escaped into the physical world and turned her into - yes, a monster. The kind of cruel that she had washed her hands off of so dramatically.
"You are right. That's what I wanted to be... the kind of safe that could actually help him. I want to change. This kind of person... I don't want to be like this anymore. I want to make amends if he would let me. Though I know I have no right to ask, and honestly don't know how. Either way... any punishment he or you would pass for causing harm to him, I will accept it."
You can break something in two seconds
But it can take forever to fix it
But it can take forever to fix it
