SUNJATA
i was never the sharp knife, but i was never the dull mind
i was somewhere in between, a thorn, an acquiescent
i was somewhere in between, a thorn, an acquiescent
They had always kind of celebrated it together; despite Sunjata’s falling toward the beginning of the season and Nate’s about the middle. So while it’s a lie, it’s close enough to the truth to be believable. To leave him the pale, gaunt ghost he is while she embraces him and he can’t look at her for fear of seeing too many holes and eyes blinking up at him, teeth growing from panes of her face where teeth most certainly shouldn’t be.
And gods is he so relieved when she believes it. “It’s okay.” He reiterates through a too hoarse voice; fight or flight at war within him that he placates by simply holding, pretending like he can be strong and stable for the both of them. Pretending like it doesn’t gut him to use Nate in such a way that’s so flagrantly not what this is.
She believes it. And he feels oily and muddy because of it.
She pushes aside her hurt of having lost (and thankfully gotten back) another child, and comforts him.
He thinks he might be sick.
Were it not for the fact that looking at her also sparks such horrifying dread, Sunjata would hurt more thinking that she expects his hurt to weigh more, when he hadn’t lost something so close to him as a child.
He’d lost a soul mate. He’s done that before. He’d survived, barely, but he’d gotten better and opened up again and tried again—
—And…
…And she believes him when he tells her he can’t be her support for her daughter dying and coming back because he has managed to make it all about himself again.
And to leave, well, it brings relief in the fact he would be able to return home eventually… but something in him fractures. It breaks. It burns and rampages against his shredded soul and he can’t even talk to the one person he wants to about it.
“Will you go to Halo?” He pleads in a broken tone, ignoring the latter of her words for the interim— the urgency as he keeps his eyes shut tight even as she starts to withdraw, fighting through the nausea and stress and anxiety to force his forehead against hers. “Please–” And even though he’s the one to try and push her away, the running thought through his mind is one that mirrors her own.
Don’t go anywhere I can’t find you. I can’t lose you too.
And gods is he so relieved when she believes it. “It’s okay.” He reiterates through a too hoarse voice; fight or flight at war within him that he placates by simply holding, pretending like he can be strong and stable for the both of them. Pretending like it doesn’t gut him to use Nate in such a way that’s so flagrantly not what this is.
She believes it. And he feels oily and muddy because of it.
She pushes aside her hurt of having lost (and thankfully gotten back) another child, and comforts him.
He thinks he might be sick.
Were it not for the fact that looking at her also sparks such horrifying dread, Sunjata would hurt more thinking that she expects his hurt to weigh more, when he hadn’t lost something so close to him as a child.
He’d lost a soul mate. He’s done that before. He’d survived, barely, but he’d gotten better and opened up again and tried again—
—And…
…And she believes him when he tells her he can’t be her support for her daughter dying and coming back because he has managed to make it all about himself again.
And to leave, well, it brings relief in the fact he would be able to return home eventually… but something in him fractures. It breaks. It burns and rampages against his shredded soul and he can’t even talk to the one person he wants to about it.
“Will you go to Halo?” He pleads in a broken tone, ignoring the latter of her words for the interim— the urgency as he keeps his eyes shut tight even as she starts to withdraw, fighting through the nausea and stress and anxiety to force his forehead against hers. “Please–” And even though he’s the one to try and push her away, the running thought through his mind is one that mirrors her own.
Don’t go anywhere I can’t find you. I can’t lose you too.
so you said it was for me, when you tried to break me
well you can save your breath, i know, i'm not the kind you pray for
well you can save your breath, i know, i'm not the kind you pray for
Feel free to use magic/force on Sunjata, without killing him <3
Sunjata speaks with an Australian accent and has a passive magic that makes him produce a subtle scent that matches exactly to whatever those around him most desire him to smell like.
