You stood by me patiently waiting and broken
She recovers mostly alone. Faint scratches on paper ask the relevant people for time, apologies and considerations obscured by empty parchment. The gravity of what needs to be done and said is not suitable for letters - but first she has to come to terms with...everything.
She failed to approach Frey's shrine in Halo more times than she cared to count. The weight of her confusion and the slow-poison trickle of hurt that stems from it too volatile to release. Certainly not without discussing it with her fiance either.
So when it became too much to bear - the silence of her own mind, the questions she couldn't answer on her own, the Tundra's drama which hadn't cared to wait for her adjustment period - she finally went home. Uncertain whether she'd come to any worthwhile conclusions but at least capable of concealing now the reaction she has when she passes by any reflective surface. It's an incomplete patch-job, but a better alternative than repeating history by tangling with a herald when you feel cornered and hopeless. Not that Frey would damn her the way Safrin had Sunjata...right?
The house feels both too large and too small from the moment she enters. Like a child awaiting punishment, she paces between the back door and the dining table, uncertain whether the weight of this reunion will be easier to bear somehow if the environment is different. Her bare feet on the wooden floors make scant noise, but it helps her feel less alone if she closes her eyes. Hotaru had thought that's what would help her come to terms with all of this, but now it presses on her lungs harder and harder every moment she weathers it.
She failed to approach Frey's shrine in Halo more times than she cared to count. The weight of her confusion and the slow-poison trickle of hurt that stems from it too volatile to release. Certainly not without discussing it with her fiance either.
So when it became too much to bear - the silence of her own mind, the questions she couldn't answer on her own, the Tundra's drama which hadn't cared to wait for her adjustment period - she finally went home. Uncertain whether she'd come to any worthwhile conclusions but at least capable of concealing now the reaction she has when she passes by any reflective surface. It's an incomplete patch-job, but a better alternative than repeating history by tangling with a herald when you feel cornered and hopeless. Not that Frey would damn her the way Safrin had Sunjata...right?
The house feels both too large and too small from the moment she enters. Like a child awaiting punishment, she paces between the back door and the dining table, uncertain whether the weight of this reunion will be easier to bear somehow if the environment is different. Her bare feet on the wooden floors make scant noise, but it helps her feel less alone if she closes her eyes. Hotaru had thought that's what would help her come to terms with all of this, but now it presses on her lungs harder and harder every moment she weathers it.
So deeply in love with every face that I've shown
Hotaru
