I have this some of the time

Isla

She ought to have expected Ever to say something like that, Isla still wincing a little to hear it - that it would be better for him to have lost a limb than for her to have cured him with that lily. Nodding once again and reaching out to wrap her hands around her mug of tea, as if to leech its burning warmth and to find steadiness within it, she can't help but ask, even knowing that the answer is likely going to be another version of I don't know. "Would it not make a difference, if I stayed or if I left?" she asks, glancing back across at him and raising an eyebrow.

He might not be able to say that he wants to be in her presence, but perhaps at least he can gauge whether or not her being there is positive or negative. Either way, with his description - Everest the table - still ringing in her ears, Isla gazes down into the depths of her tea. "There was another reason for my coming here," she says suddenly. "I'd have told you in a letter, of course, if you hadn't wanted to see me, but since I am here... Torchline is going to be able to protect Haulani from all elements of the void - the creatures and The Family, except for Vox's listening ears. I thought you might want to know, in case..."

In case he wanted somewhere to feel safer, even if it means being closer to her.

sooner or later, we all have to wake
and try forgetting everything