// somebody told me that there's two sides to this life //
It seemed a contradiction, to question herself yet trust herself and also take responsibility for her choices. Her brow wrinkled in confusion, wrestling with the concepts until Hadama's hand settled on her shoulder - a warm weight of reassurance that made it seem alright to not understand right away. And perhaps that was why she didn't feel ready, why she let herself be talked out of her plans, why the grace of 'maybe later' felt like such a relief.
"I think I need to work on myself first," she confessed, pressing her cheek against his hand in a rare show of affection before lifting it again to strare down her reflection. "If I can't even accept who I am, how could I possibly accept the myriad others who I'd be responsible for?" As her tail slithered past, Maea caught it in her hands, fingers restlessly digging into the extremity, like she could force herself to get used to it that way. Some days it was like she'd never been anything but Ancient, while days like today she felt like a fraud, wearing the horns and the tail but being nothing at all like one on the inside.
"What's on your mind, lately?" she asked her friend, when no answers appeared no matter how she glared at herself. She wanted to know his mind, his concerns, what silenced him in fear and what kept him going despite it. Because she cared. And because maybe the answer to her worries lay not within herself, but in the people around her.
"I think I need to work on myself first," she confessed, pressing her cheek against his hand in a rare show of affection before lifting it again to strare down her reflection. "If I can't even accept who I am, how could I possibly accept the myriad others who I'd be responsible for?" As her tail slithered past, Maea caught it in her hands, fingers restlessly digging into the extremity, like she could force herself to get used to it that way. Some days it was like she'd never been anything but Ancient, while days like today she felt like a fraud, wearing the horns and the tail but being nothing at all like one on the inside.
"What's on your mind, lately?" she asked her friend, when no answers appeared no matter how she glared at herself. She wanted to know his mind, his concerns, what silenced him in fear and what kept him going despite it. Because she cared. And because maybe the answer to her worries lay not within herself, but in the people around her.
Maea
// I think I might've chosen darkness over light //
