Our new house’s closet always scared me. It was different from my other one. But I could never explain what was so bad. Maybe it was hard to put into words. And my parents didn’t get it. They weren’t kids anymore.
Nighttime had me begging and pleading, covers drawn up close to my head, tucked near my chin, like that would ward everything away. “Mom, can you please look in there?” She hadn’t before. But maybe begging and pleading this time would be enough. Then she’d tell me it was nothing, and I could believe it.
She must’ve seen the look of horror on my face. The fear, the fright. She sighed. “Just this once. And then we’re going to be done talking about it.” The resignation was clear. She wanted it over and done with. Didn’t want to hear about it anymore.
I watched as she drew open the large wooden doors, eyes widening as she stepped within, disappearing for only a second – probably to retrieve clothes for school tomorrow, or peering around the shirts dangling on hangers. Looking for the monsters or the scary, creeping things keeping me up at all hours.
When she turned back to me, my heart pounded. My fingers shook. Her stare was on me. “See? Nothing to be afraid of.”
“Yes,” I nodded and lied, noticing her eyes had turned to red.
Nighttime had me begging and pleading, covers drawn up close to my head, tucked near my chin, like that would ward everything away. “Mom, can you please look in there?” She hadn’t before. But maybe begging and pleading this time would be enough. Then she’d tell me it was nothing, and I could believe it.
She must’ve seen the look of horror on my face. The fear, the fright. She sighed. “Just this once. And then we’re going to be done talking about it.” The resignation was clear. She wanted it over and done with. Didn’t want to hear about it anymore.
I watched as she drew open the large wooden doors, eyes widening as she stepped within, disappearing for only a second – probably to retrieve clothes for school tomorrow, or peering around the shirts dangling on hangers. Looking for the monsters or the scary, creeping things keeping me up at all hours.
When she turned back to me, my heart pounded. My fingers shook. Her stare was on me. “See? Nothing to be afraid of.”
“Yes,” I nodded and lied, noticing her eyes had turned to red.
