always taking up too much space or time

And I feel like my castle's crumbling down
And I watch all my bridges burn to the ground

Sometimes, the Attuned bond was a blessing. Other times - like now - it was a curse. There was no privacy as she shattered internally, no shelter as she tried to piece herself back together, even as shards of glass continued to fall around her feet. Despite her best efforts, emotions leaked out from the sharp edges, trickling through the spaces that she couldn't quite mend to pool between them.

A part of her wanted to lash out. Something deeply defensive hated being so vulnerable, especially in the wake of such a devastating battle. But this wasn't Noah's fault. He was showing her nothing but kindness, and she wasn't going to repay him with vitriol.

So she ground her teeth and clenched her jaw, tensing as he seemed to read her mind. He could tell her all day long that she wasn't expendable, but she wouldn't believe him. How could she, when everyone seemed to leave her behind in one way or another? If she was so critical, how had she ended up alone, time and time again?

And yet... how could she still think herself alone? After everything, she still had friends. Perhaps she had no family, no lover, no companion, but that didn't make her other bonds any less real. And Noah was one of those people - someone who was reaching out, extending a hand when she was at her lowest. How could she deny him a simple conversation?

"Okay," she breathed, voice tight with suppressed emotion. "I'm not okay, and I haven't been for a long time. I don't think I know how to be okay anymore. But I'm trying, and that's the best I can offer."

And you don't want to know me, I will just let you down
You don't wanna know me now

Sohalia