”He thinks its wonderful, as do I. His first shift is a white-tailed eagle, if that gives you any look into who he is growing into.” He said as he stepped toward the shrine, boots careful on the slick volcanic stone, flashing her a grin. Noah had known eagles of many varieties to symbolize strength, courage, and freedom, and that felt befitting for a young man finding his way in the great wide world of Caido. ”The wisdom? Must have been one of the things from Vi I got to keep.” He winked, nose wrinkling some with his jest back towards her. Ahead, Frey’s altar was as indulgent as ever, with flowers overgrown and unapologetic, petals bruised open by the rain, older offerings collapsing sweetly into rot. Life devouring life. Desire unashamed of its hunger.
He knelt without ceremony. From the leather wrap at his belt he drew the offering: the last of the ripe summer fruits he had been able to find before the season turned. Their skins were sun-warmed gold and blushing red, imperfect, fragrant even in the rain. Carefully, he set them among the others. After sending a prayer towards the dual deity, Noah stood to look at the Valkyrie again.
Glacier eyes held her now—not hard, not unkind. Just unwavering. “Ru,” he said with weight to her name, ”if the only reason you silence your anger is to keep him from leaving, then he is not choosing you freely.” The words were not cruel, but he knew they may hurt regardless. “You are not introducing hurdles by having feelings.” His jaw tightened faintly. “You are asking to be met.” Steam burst from the sea below, a hollow roar filling the space between them before fading again into the hush of rain. “Love that survives only when you carve pieces off of yourself is not love. It is negotiation. That’s true for you, and for Sunjata. If he has to live like that to be loved by you, then that is not love at all.”
He stepped closer, close enough that he barely had to raise his voice above a whisper even with the rain and the wind and the waves in the distance. The bond carried no judgment, but concern. And, unashamed and bright, something protective. Rain gathered on his lashes again. He did not blink it away. “You are allowed to live while he decides,” Noah said firmly. “You are allowed to feel angry. Betrayed. Hopeful. All of it. None of those things will summon him faster, or drive him away, if what binds you is real.”
He glanced briefly toward the fruit resting at Frey’s shrine. It killed him to think that Hotaru was making herself smaller in the hope that Sunjata would return to fill the space. She was so much more than that. Noah’s face twisted with concern. ”Would it truly make you a hypocrite? Has Sunjata ever truly waited for you? Made you his first choice?” Noah knew there were intricacies to their relationship he couldn’t know, didn’t understand. It had been that way with he and Cordelia — decisions the Shrike made to turn her to the One Shot, decisions that had been Noah’s and not her’s in all truth and reality. Even with all the ways he disliked the Flood for his past actions and decisions, he had come to an even neutrality with him since his reuniting with the Valkyrie. He had to have some grace, somewhere, and the understanding that he didn’t know everything was the only thing that fueled the grace.
