Zavien
Never regret anything that made you smile
The tender gesture and calm validation softened the tension marring his features, but as her hand and eyes dropped, so did the flicker of peace. His expression darkened with insistence, refusing to let her dig that hole. Zavien turned, his free hand lifting to cup her cheek, forcing her to look nowhere but his face, to see the seriousness steeling across the green in his eyes. "You are not the complication, Soh, and you never will be." Bringing his head lower, he added confidently, "The circumstances are the complication."
As for what he wanted, Zavien sighed, deflating as the risks and consequences took that careless abandon he wished desperately to feel again. His hand fell away, a saddened smile gracing his lips as he shook his head. "I wish it was as simple as doing what I want." But Zavien didn't want to be that kind of friend. Greed was a slippery slope that hamstringed everyone in its path, and it let to nothing but a pit of unhappiness and despair.
Conflict rose in his chest as Soh pulled away. He wanted to drag her back. He wanted to admire her curves in the morning sunlight. He wanted to follow dutifully after her. And every thought scared him beyond comprehension. There was still so much they needed to figure out, so many lines to draw. How could he do that when he hadn't the faintest clue how Koa would react? How could he be reasonable when she looked like that? Blonde hair sat glowing atop her head, a perfect halo around her moonlit eyes. Every slope of her body was outlined against the window, giving her an otherworldly, painted quality that he itched to run his hands along.
But that would only further complicate things, so Zavien had to settle for running a frustrated hand through his own hair before offering a belated and distracted smile at her words. "Both are great ideas." Food might be scarce, but the companions shouldn't be hard to find.
Having thought she'd continue on the line of pragmatic thoughts, he coughed a laugh at her blunt appraisal of the conversation that would ultimately define whatever this was. He ran a hand along his neck where a flash of redness threatened to appear. "Well... I don't like the idea of 'friends with benefits.' You deserve better than that." And his mother had made it clear that a woman deserved love and respect, not shallow sex and shallower feelings. Plus, it felt... wrong to think of Soh like that. Nothing if not honest, he added with a sheepish grin, "But I would be lying if I said I didn't want to have a repeat of yesterday."
Just the view of a gilded Soh propped up naked in his bed was enough to have heat rising again, but if he lingered on thoughts of yesterday, Zavien worried he might make a fool of himself so early in the morning. He cleared his throat, his jaw feathering as he swallowed back the urge to act before they could clarify anything. "Maybe we can discuss it more once we're both dressed with food in our stomachs." Clear heads seemed the appropriate means for such a conversation.
Smiling at her, he turned away to stand. The breeze immediately revealed to him that he was equally as bare. A flush rose to his cheeks and he ate up the distance to his single dresser in a manner of three strides, sliding on a pair of boxers with a quiet breath of relief. By the time he looked back to Soh, some of his composure had returned, but a faint blush remained to brighten his smile. "Do you want to borrow something?" He wasn't sure how she felt about putting on the same clothes as yesterday, the same ones that had grown stale sitting on the floor of his living room.
As for what he wanted, Zavien sighed, deflating as the risks and consequences took that careless abandon he wished desperately to feel again. His hand fell away, a saddened smile gracing his lips as he shook his head. "I wish it was as simple as doing what I want." But Zavien didn't want to be that kind of friend. Greed was a slippery slope that hamstringed everyone in its path, and it let to nothing but a pit of unhappiness and despair.
Conflict rose in his chest as Soh pulled away. He wanted to drag her back. He wanted to admire her curves in the morning sunlight. He wanted to follow dutifully after her. And every thought scared him beyond comprehension. There was still so much they needed to figure out, so many lines to draw. How could he do that when he hadn't the faintest clue how Koa would react? How could he be reasonable when she looked like that? Blonde hair sat glowing atop her head, a perfect halo around her moonlit eyes. Every slope of her body was outlined against the window, giving her an otherworldly, painted quality that he itched to run his hands along.
But that would only further complicate things, so Zavien had to settle for running a frustrated hand through his own hair before offering a belated and distracted smile at her words. "Both are great ideas." Food might be scarce, but the companions shouldn't be hard to find.
Having thought she'd continue on the line of pragmatic thoughts, he coughed a laugh at her blunt appraisal of the conversation that would ultimately define whatever this was. He ran a hand along his neck where a flash of redness threatened to appear. "Well... I don't like the idea of 'friends with benefits.' You deserve better than that." And his mother had made it clear that a woman deserved love and respect, not shallow sex and shallower feelings. Plus, it felt... wrong to think of Soh like that. Nothing if not honest, he added with a sheepish grin, "But I would be lying if I said I didn't want to have a repeat of yesterday."
Just the view of a gilded Soh propped up naked in his bed was enough to have heat rising again, but if he lingered on thoughts of yesterday, Zavien worried he might make a fool of himself so early in the morning. He cleared his throat, his jaw feathering as he swallowed back the urge to act before they could clarify anything. "Maybe we can discuss it more once we're both dressed with food in our stomachs." Clear heads seemed the appropriate means for such a conversation.
Smiling at her, he turned away to stand. The breeze immediately revealed to him that he was equally as bare. A flush rose to his cheeks and he ate up the distance to his single dresser in a manner of three strides, sliding on a pair of boxers with a quiet breath of relief. By the time he looked back to Soh, some of his composure had returned, but a faint blush remained to brighten his smile. "Do you want to borrow something?" He wasn't sure how she felt about putting on the same clothes as yesterday, the same ones that had grown stale sitting on the floor of his living room.
