Hotaru
I miss the days when stars were saintly
They sang to me in ways innately
They sang to me in ways innately
The quiet recognition of her admittedly antagonistic questioning settles her, taking the wind from already tattered sails. The fight she is waging is not against him. Unfortunately, she isn't sure who - or what - she is fighting. Is there even a fight to be had when she's been stripped of proactive options by Sunjata?
Lightning illuminates the shrine and sends light scattering across every wet, reflective surface, highlighting the apex of Noah's cheek and outlining the broadness of his shoulders in there-and-gone backlighting that makes him seem larger and stronger than he already is. It feels poetic; Hotaru's oldest and most integral elemental magic bringing them out of shadow for a single moment, half-blinded but temporarily able to see one another clearer as well.
Her own words on his tongue makes her hackles fall further, deflating and curling in on herself with a look both pained and contemplative.
"I believed it too," she admits softly beneath the hazy white-noise of rain. Can she say she still does? Or does she believe herself above it, exempt, as she does so many other things?
Noah need not fear crowding her. As he steps closer she closes the distance and lays her forehead against his collarbone - the highest she can reach - with a pathetic thump. Arms still wrapped around herself, but taking physical comfort how she can. Purpose is so hard to find here. Adapting to Caido's ways hasn't been easy for me, so being alone is a worse fate in my eyes than it used to be. All the things that used to define her - thief, queen, mother, spy - are unwelcome and unbefitting of Caido. She'd been hoping for motherhood once more, but that too is lost now. But he doesn't want me to wait. So it doesn't matter, does it? Being angry, being a hypocrite, being alone... All she can do is choose whether to take Sunjata at his word and try to move on while also attempting to remain open to the idea of getting back together without letting it impair her (which seems like an impossible balancing act).
All that stops her is her own loyalty. How ironic. Unwanted or unneeded as it may be, how can she remain open to loving him again without restricting how much of her heart she gives to someone else in the interim? I'm my own hostage, while he's free to work on himself, even if it may be at the expense of his heart and ability to love. And she can't look to the Heartless to be any clearer than he already has been.
Lightning illuminates the shrine and sends light scattering across every wet, reflective surface, highlighting the apex of Noah's cheek and outlining the broadness of his shoulders in there-and-gone backlighting that makes him seem larger and stronger than he already is. It feels poetic; Hotaru's oldest and most integral elemental magic bringing them out of shadow for a single moment, half-blinded but temporarily able to see one another clearer as well.
Her own words on his tongue makes her hackles fall further, deflating and curling in on herself with a look both pained and contemplative.
"I believed it too," she admits softly beneath the hazy white-noise of rain. Can she say she still does? Or does she believe herself above it, exempt, as she does so many other things?
Noah need not fear crowding her. As he steps closer she closes the distance and lays her forehead against his collarbone - the highest she can reach - with a pathetic thump. Arms still wrapped around herself, but taking physical comfort how she can. Purpose is so hard to find here. Adapting to Caido's ways hasn't been easy for me, so being alone is a worse fate in my eyes than it used to be. All the things that used to define her - thief, queen, mother, spy - are unwelcome and unbefitting of Caido. She'd been hoping for motherhood once more, but that too is lost now. But he doesn't want me to wait. So it doesn't matter, does it? Being angry, being a hypocrite, being alone... All she can do is choose whether to take Sunjata at his word and try to move on while also attempting to remain open to the idea of getting back together without letting it impair her (which seems like an impossible balancing act).
All that stops her is her own loyalty. How ironic. Unwanted or unneeded as it may be, how can she remain open to loving him again without restricting how much of her heart she gives to someone else in the interim? I'm my own hostage, while he's free to work on himself, even if it may be at the expense of his heart and ability to love. And she can't look to the Heartless to be any clearer than he already has been.
But my ghost was lost to the grownup gallows
So I find my spirit in the bottle
So I find my spirit in the bottle
