If you could go back to yesterday
Hurt flashed across Soh’s face, because she did think Colt had offered her a place because of her mapmaking ability and her previous leadership experience. But maybe that was silly, because, after all, Flora wasn’t wrong. Colt needed bodies for her venture, and maybe Soh was just one more gullible person to trick into accompanying her - even if that didn’t feel very fair to Colt.
She bit her lip as Flora flashed her an apologetic look, but the words still stung in the back of her mind, especially so soon after their disagreement. A vague sense of panic blossomed in Soh’s chest, fear of somehow growing apart, of losing her best friend like she’d lost everyone else who had mattered to her. She was suddenly adrift and unmoored, and she clung almost desperately to Flora’s hand without really thinking about the weight of her sudden squeeze.
”No, I know -“ she said, swallowing back a sudden urge to cry. ”I know, and that’s the point. You would do anything to help me, but you shouldn’t have to, because I should be able to stand on my own two feet instead of relying on you to figure things out for me.” She should be stronger, better, more self-sufficient - and instead she was living on Flora’s generosity, staying in her home, in her region, being offered an obligatory position on her council, being given her resources. None of it really belonged to Soh, and that was what made it harder to swallow.
Upset and overwhelmed, Soh shook her head, as though willing all these negative emotions to go back into the box where she liked to hide them in the back of her mind. ”I just need you to be here,” she whispered. ”Like you always have been.” To support her, certainly. Perhaps to question her judgment at times, to make sure she was doing what was actually right. And even to argue, if it came down to it, because Soh could love Flora and not agree with her.
She bit her lip as Flora flashed her an apologetic look, but the words still stung in the back of her mind, especially so soon after their disagreement. A vague sense of panic blossomed in Soh’s chest, fear of somehow growing apart, of losing her best friend like she’d lost everyone else who had mattered to her. She was suddenly adrift and unmoored, and she clung almost desperately to Flora’s hand without really thinking about the weight of her sudden squeeze.
”No, I know -“ she said, swallowing back a sudden urge to cry. ”I know, and that’s the point. You would do anything to help me, but you shouldn’t have to, because I should be able to stand on my own two feet instead of relying on you to figure things out for me.” She should be stronger, better, more self-sufficient - and instead she was living on Flora’s generosity, staying in her home, in her region, being offered an obligatory position on her council, being given her resources. None of it really belonged to Soh, and that was what made it harder to swallow.
Upset and overwhelmed, Soh shook her head, as though willing all these negative emotions to go back into the box where she liked to hide them in the back of her mind. ”I just need you to be here,” she whispered. ”Like you always have been.” To support her, certainly. Perhaps to question her judgment at times, to make sure she was doing what was actually right. And even to argue, if it came down to it, because Soh could love Flora and not agree with her.
Would you change it all for me?
Minor powerplay allowed without permission.
Feel free to use force/magic on Sohalia.
Feel free to use force/magic on Sohalia.
