If you could go back to yesterday
Everything felt wrong, like somehow everything that they were had gotten shuffled up, the pieces no longer fitting into place. Swallowing back the tears that threatened, prickling at the back of her eyes, Soh looked down at their intertwined hands. The motion was right, but the feeling behind it couldn't have been further from it. She'd never felt so detached from her best friend before, like they were on opposite sides of a great divide with no bridge to bring them back together again.
What was it about today that was exposing their differences in a way that had never been done before? How had they made it this far into their friendship without ever having realized how different they were? Had something changed? Had she changed? She didn't feel any different - happier, maybe, but she couldn't see that as a bad thing - but there had to be some explanation for this distance cropping up between them, didn't there?
Flora's words only served to make Soh feel worse. She could feel the Doubletake's pain behind them, and she didn't know how to explain that none of this was a commentary on Flora, but rather on herself: on her feelings, on what she felt capable of, on what she wanted from life. How could she make Flora understand that there was nothing here except a desire for something that she had built, without having to drag down the people she cared about to get there?
Swallowing hard, Soh pressed her lips together, fighting the urge to argue more when it seemed they were at such an impasse. She'd never been able to take care of herself, and she wasn't sure how Flora couldn't see it. From being attacked in Stormbreak, to being kidnapped by the Family, to being unable to protect Flora from death or infection, to not being able to keep Tarak alive, to not being able to lead Stormbreak again when it really mattered. There were so many reasons she could point to and say, but what about when...?
She leaned her head against Flora's shoulder, settling against her best friend with tears in her eyes, unable to explain her feelings in a way that would make them make sense. "I love you, Flora," she whispered into the brittle space between them. "I'm sorry for everything." It was the only thing she could think to offer that felt real, that felt easy to explain.
What was it about today that was exposing their differences in a way that had never been done before? How had they made it this far into their friendship without ever having realized how different they were? Had something changed? Had she changed? She didn't feel any different - happier, maybe, but she couldn't see that as a bad thing - but there had to be some explanation for this distance cropping up between them, didn't there?
Flora's words only served to make Soh feel worse. She could feel the Doubletake's pain behind them, and she didn't know how to explain that none of this was a commentary on Flora, but rather on herself: on her feelings, on what she felt capable of, on what she wanted from life. How could she make Flora understand that there was nothing here except a desire for something that she had built, without having to drag down the people she cared about to get there?
Swallowing hard, Soh pressed her lips together, fighting the urge to argue more when it seemed they were at such an impasse. She'd never been able to take care of herself, and she wasn't sure how Flora couldn't see it. From being attacked in Stormbreak, to being kidnapped by the Family, to being unable to protect Flora from death or infection, to not being able to keep Tarak alive, to not being able to lead Stormbreak again when it really mattered. There were so many reasons she could point to and say, but what about when...?
She leaned her head against Flora's shoulder, settling against her best friend with tears in her eyes, unable to explain her feelings in a way that would make them make sense. "I love you, Flora," she whispered into the brittle space between them. "I'm sorry for everything." It was the only thing she could think to offer that felt real, that felt easy to explain.
Would you change it all for me?
Minor powerplay allowed without permission.
Feel free to use force/magic on Sohalia.
Feel free to use force/magic on Sohalia.
