However terrible Oliver might have felt about his thoughts, he was far from the first to voice such feelings of frustration and disappointment. Jigano only nodded in understanding, letting him continue without interruption as the Provost sat still and quiet, sipping his tea. They were words the young man seemed to need to get off his chest, and the bard was content to listen for as long as was needed until the blond trailed off in defeat.
Even then the white-haired man didn't speak up immediately. He looked thoughtful as he leaned over to the tea caddy to pluck the little bowl of sugar cubes over. They were running low, but not so low that he couldn't still offer them to his guest as he dropped one into his own cup. He let his thoughts fall into order before he replied, his voice gentle. "Your feelings aren't wrong," he said, not chiding - not the way he had once chided Sam and Amalia, at least. He was trying to do better, to be better than that after the lessons they had taught him. Instead he tried to be encouraging, and to let Oliver know that he wasn't alone. "There are many who feel the same way, even among the Naturals. Phoebe... has never had magic or been cursed by the gods. She's an Accepted, I believe. One who all the gods court to try and win to their side. She wouldn't understand what others go through, here. Abandoned, Attuned, Ascended... all struggle with one or another of the gods. Abandoned, though, have it the hardest."
He drew a slow breath, considering his next words carefully as he met Oliver's gaze. "It's not necessarily fair, to blame all for the mistakes of some, but even the gods aren't perfect. This is they way they are, and they aren't likely to change their minds so quickly, to welcome the descendants of those who betrayed them back with open arms. From what you have said, I can see a few options available to you, but there may be others I haven't thought of yet. First," he raised a finger, his smile going crooked, "if they don't want anything to do with you, you can also chose to have little to do with them. Many Natural Abandoned - and even Accepted - go this route. Live your life as you see fit without seeking their approval or involvement. Pray if you must in times of need or desperation, but otherwise let the gods take care of their own problems." It was what Rory did, and several others the bard knew, who had no love for being meddled with.
"If you do seek their goodwill, then it's something you may need to work to earn, as with anybody you want to ask favors from. Help those who serve them, like Amalia and Phoebe and Ronin. Learn about them and try to let go of your anger, if you can. Mistakes can be fixed, but you already know that approaching them with resentment in your heart won't end well, not with the power they wield." He tilted his head sympathetically, leaning back in his chair and crossing his leg as he made himself comfortable now that the tea was served. "I know it won't be easy, and it's something that may take time to overcome... but perhaps learning more about them will help to ease some of that resentment you feel? Can you tell me what you already know about them?" He had given his history lesson in broad, vague strokes, but if Oliver had already spoken with Phoebe and others he might know more than Jigano had realized. And maybe there were some misconceptions or blind spots that hadn't been addressed that he could help clear up, now that he knew the root of Oliver's fears.
Even then the white-haired man didn't speak up immediately. He looked thoughtful as he leaned over to the tea caddy to pluck the little bowl of sugar cubes over. They were running low, but not so low that he couldn't still offer them to his guest as he dropped one into his own cup. He let his thoughts fall into order before he replied, his voice gentle. "Your feelings aren't wrong," he said, not chiding - not the way he had once chided Sam and Amalia, at least. He was trying to do better, to be better than that after the lessons they had taught him. Instead he tried to be encouraging, and to let Oliver know that he wasn't alone. "There are many who feel the same way, even among the Naturals. Phoebe... has never had magic or been cursed by the gods. She's an Accepted, I believe. One who all the gods court to try and win to their side. She wouldn't understand what others go through, here. Abandoned, Attuned, Ascended... all struggle with one or another of the gods. Abandoned, though, have it the hardest."
He drew a slow breath, considering his next words carefully as he met Oliver's gaze. "It's not necessarily fair, to blame all for the mistakes of some, but even the gods aren't perfect. This is they way they are, and they aren't likely to change their minds so quickly, to welcome the descendants of those who betrayed them back with open arms. From what you have said, I can see a few options available to you, but there may be others I haven't thought of yet. First," he raised a finger, his smile going crooked, "if they don't want anything to do with you, you can also chose to have little to do with them. Many Natural Abandoned - and even Accepted - go this route. Live your life as you see fit without seeking their approval or involvement. Pray if you must in times of need or desperation, but otherwise let the gods take care of their own problems." It was what Rory did, and several others the bard knew, who had no love for being meddled with.
"If you do seek their goodwill, then it's something you may need to work to earn, as with anybody you want to ask favors from. Help those who serve them, like Amalia and Phoebe and Ronin. Learn about them and try to let go of your anger, if you can. Mistakes can be fixed, but you already know that approaching them with resentment in your heart won't end well, not with the power they wield." He tilted his head sympathetically, leaning back in his chair and crossing his leg as he made himself comfortable now that the tea was served. "I know it won't be easy, and it's something that may take time to overcome... but perhaps learning more about them will help to ease some of that resentment you feel? Can you tell me what you already know about them?" He had given his history lesson in broad, vague strokes, but if Oliver had already spoken with Phoebe and others he might know more than Jigano had realized. And maybe there were some misconceptions or blind spots that hadn't been addressed that he could help clear up, now that he knew the root of Oliver's fears.
