She looked between them, wary, suspicious, sensing that many things passed between them beyond merely words. If there was a connection between her and Sunjata then there was definitely one between him and Nate as well, and there was something slimey, ugly, greenblack and noxious that slithered through her insides at the notion. It was rather unexpected, because she had never really been jealous over the storm-eyed Flood before, and here, now, it seemed a very foolish thing. When not even his marriage to Phoebe had made her feel it, why should this? But with all her senses on high alert, emotions raw and on edge, perhaps it was just the insecurities speaking. The desperate desire to keep things close, keep them private.
Even though she could not, not here. Not like this.
Strangely, it was the jealousy that steadied her in the end. Maea got the sense that they were laughing, possibly at her, and it rankled. Sparked just enough annoyance that it took the worst edge off the terror. She still tensed as Nate approached, hunching down by her chair, looking very calm and very reassuring indeed. Like a snake stretched out on a rock, basking in the sun. The teeth might be hidden, but Maea knew they were there. Her fingers tightened around Sunjata's hand, gripping so hard that her knuckles whitened, and for the longest time she stared at that outstretched hand, that quiet request. Thinking. Weighing.
'You'll be fine. I promise.'
He promised. Like before, when he'd said 'I won't let you drown'. He'd kept it that time, she'd not been swept away by the river (or had she?) and she was still breathing fine, head above water (was that really true?) and how bad could it be, really? All she had to do was let go (just let go) and let herself fall.
Would they catch her if she did?
Slowly, hands shaking, fingers icy cold and numb, she stretched out her hand and placed it on Nate's open palm. There was a strange ringing in her ear, and the room was spinning a little... then she took a breath and it steadied itself. A little.
[say]"I trust you."[/say]
It was not entirely clear who of them she spoke to. Maybe both.
Even though she could not, not here. Not like this.
Strangely, it was the jealousy that steadied her in the end. Maea got the sense that they were laughing, possibly at her, and it rankled. Sparked just enough annoyance that it took the worst edge off the terror. She still tensed as Nate approached, hunching down by her chair, looking very calm and very reassuring indeed. Like a snake stretched out on a rock, basking in the sun. The teeth might be hidden, but Maea knew they were there. Her fingers tightened around Sunjata's hand, gripping so hard that her knuckles whitened, and for the longest time she stared at that outstretched hand, that quiet request. Thinking. Weighing.
'You'll be fine. I promise.'
He promised. Like before, when he'd said 'I won't let you drown'. He'd kept it that time, she'd not been swept away by the river (or had she?) and she was still breathing fine, head above water (was that really true?) and how bad could it be, really? All she had to do was let go (just let go) and let herself fall.
Would they catch her if she did?
Slowly, hands shaking, fingers icy cold and numb, she stretched out her hand and placed it on Nate's open palm. There was a strange ringing in her ear, and the room was spinning a little... then she took a breath and it steadied itself. A little.
[say]"I trust you."[/say]
It was not entirely clear who of them she spoke to. Maybe both.
