in over my head

RONIN if there's one thing i'm good at, it's surviving Ronin hummed in agreement, and though he didn't want the words to make a difference, it was clear by his quiet thoughtfulness that he was chewing them over. Was it so different from Ronin going out and dying while fighting the Spire Demon? That too, would have been done for their daughter. But... it didn't stop it from hurting. It didn't take any of the what-ifs away, or nightmares, or tears. He swallowed hard and left that for future contemplation. Still, at least Phoebe's examination of his daughter seemed to be gentle and thorough, and the midwife didn't look as if she was finding anything of concern. Ronin smiled to himself, even, as he watched Aoife wriggle and look around and coo up at Phoebe, snuggling into her as she was picked up and cradled. Letting out a sigh of utter relief, he nodded to her. "Thank you. That puts me at ease more than you know," he said, though his brow furrowed at the mention of a wet nurse. "If you would, I'd appreciate it. I've been feeding her goat's milk right now, but... I know she needs something better. Still, at least she doesn't seem sick, or hungry. Right?" He watched curiously as she pottered around, not really knowing what was going on, and only when it was evident that she was putting something together for him did he realise how tongue-tied he was. "Phoebe, you don't have to do that... I mean. I... thank you. What can I do to repay you for your kindness?"