[SE] Ignore all the burdens that you keep

Tryin' to wash away all the blood I've spilt
This lust is a burden that we both share

Maea’s touch was soothing more so than distracting at this particular moment in time, and Liam reveled in the change she’d brought about in him; no longer tense, he was able to think logically, examining his reactions from earlier without slipping back into that mental space. He leaned his forehead against hers, listening intently as she spoke. Not for the first time, he was struck by how much she wanted from life. Perhaps it was that she had already died twice, but she wanted to live, and as someone who had spent so long merely surviving, Liam admired that about her.

But what he wanted didn’t feel so easily defined. ”For most of my life, everything I did was about protecting people - not just people I care about, but my region. I trained to become physically stronger and more capable. I did what I could to be able to contribute to something bigger than myself. I thought ensuring the safety of Stormbreak was my calling.” But that wasn’t how life had turned out, and while Liam was okay with that, it had left him adrift.

”Then, in the Greatwood… for so long, I was just trying to make it from one day to the next. I didn’t think about what I wanted so much as what I needed.” Liam rubbed a hand over Maea’s back, toyed with the tips of her hair. He wasn’t sure where he was going with this, except to say that now he got to think about what he wanted again, no longer stuck in a cycle of one day at a time, but now looking forward to a future that he wanted to plan for.

”Now… now I want peace,” Peace for Caido, sure, but inner peace for himself, too; to forgive himself for his past failings and allow himself to heal. ”I want to have a purpose; I want to build something not just for myself, but something that… means something. I want to take care of the Greatwood. I want to find out who I am beyond just a soldier.” He paused, leaning his face into Maea’s hand. ”I’m not exactly sure how to get all that just yet, but… maybe it’s time I figure it out.”

Two sinners can't atone from a lone prayer
Souls tied, intertwined by our pride and guilt

Liam

// won't you breathe with me? //

Listening intently to the hum of his voice, a smile began to spread across her lips. He made every bit of sense to her, and she followed the trail of his thoughts with growing sense of pride in how far he'd come. Most of the healing he had done on his own, over time. That she might have contributed even a little bit was just the cherry on top. And from here on? His was a journey she looked forward to be a part of.

"The details and the 'how' don't matter as much, if you know the 'why'. That's what I've found, at least. Keep your eyes on the goal, and an open mind, and even detours can end up bringing you closer to where you want to be." Maea stroked the line of his cheekbone with her thumb, approval of his listed desires lighting up her features. "Honestly, I'm glad that you still care for the Greatwood. Sometimes it's felt like you were thinking about leaving... did I imagine that?" If she had, the worry it nevertheless had caused her showed how much the region was coming to mean to her. The longer she stayed, the more she learned and became familiar with it, the more at home she felt. Maybe she really was putting down roots – and maybe her interest in applying herself to the land and the people who lived there truly went beyond self-satisfaction, like she'd been accused of.

Maea

// won't you take me to your heart? //

Tryin' to wash away all the blood I've spilt
This lust is a burden that we both share

Perhaps some would have taken Maea’s advice as inserting herself where she wasn’t needed, but to Liam, it was like a breath of fresh air. He smiled at her sweetly, nudging her nose with his own. ”Wise words,” he said. Hadn’t the Greatwood taught him the very same thing? That the journey could sometimes be long and winding, but so long as one persevered to their destination, things would work themselves out?

Speaking of the Greatwood, Liam hummed thoughtfully. ”I thought about going back to Stormbreak,” he admitted, hesitant. This was the one topic they didn’t quite agree on, and he didn’t want to break the spell they were under by bringing it up. But since she’d asked… ”Before the Family left.” It seemed like both yesterday and a lifetime ago. ”But… Stormbreak isn’t my home anymore.” It was strange and liberating to say that out loud, after so long of wondering if he hadn’t just run away from his problems. But it was true - he’d found the place where he belonged. Doubly so, since Maea was there. But even without his partner, the Greatwood was still where he wanted to return to, time and again.

Two sinners can't atone from a lone prayer
Souls tied, intertwined by our pride and guilt

Liam

// won't you breathe with me? //

Of all her bad habits, unsolicited advice remained among the more benign. It was hard to refrain from trying to help, and at least in this case it fell on good soil. Liam's remark made her blush slightly, abashed and caught with the realization that she'd done it again. Gone preaching to the choir, talking like she hadn't just figured these things out for herself.
"Ah... really? I didn't mean to sound so..." well, preachy.

Nuzzling him right back, she sobered slightly as he mentioned Stormbreak, indeed left with mixed feelings whenever the Family and their lingering influence over him entered the picture. Respecting his wishes on the matter proved difficult when she knew that it likely had been brought about by coersion. Was he truly happy like this? Would he ever resent her for letting the curse remain, when she could work harder to find the cure? That the Family could no longer use him did improve things, but not remove her concern entirely.
"I'm glad," she simply said in the end, returning to the topic at hand. "If you really wanted to go there, I'd come with you... but I really do prefer the woods."
Satisfied that she'd been correct in her suspicions, and thus knew him well enough to read the unspoken signals, Maea melted deeper into his arms with a contented sigh.

Maea

// won't you take me to your heart? //

Tryin' to wash away all the blood I've spilt
This lust is a burden that we both share

Liam chuckled as Maea became suddenly abashed, as though caught doing something she hadn’t meant to be doing. ”You sound lovely,” he assured her, pressing a quick kiss to her lips to silence any further apologies. ”And, as it happens, you’re right.”

Talk of Stormbreak didn’t bring the residual ache that it once did. Nostalgia, to be sure, for simpler times, but no longer did he have to yearn for happier days of old. Happiness had crept up on him now, surrounding him once again in its warm glow. ”We can certainly visit,” Liam said, relieved that they could skirt around the topic of the Family. ”But home is the Greatwood.” Wherever Maea was, actually, but since that was currently the forest, that seemed, to Liam, to be implied.

The Ancient melted into him, and Liam held her close. ”Are you alright?” he asked after a moment. They’d talked about him and his problems - but what of Maea? She’d seemed to recover from their shared experience, but he wanted to be sure all the same.

Two sinners can't atone from a lone prayer
Souls tied, intertwined by our pride and guilt

Liam

// won't you breathe with me? //

"Mmh, if you say so." How could she keep objecting when he sounded so sure? The kiss may have had something to do with her easy compliance too, granted. She stole another kiss before he moved away again, because one never felt like enough, but made herself settle after that. She was too tired to feed the flames of desire right now, aware that if it came down to a test of wills in this moment, she was likely to lose.
"I do want that," she conceded, about visiting Stormbreak. "I'd like to see where you grew up... and you still have friends there, right?" Old and new, with all that it implied. 

The lazy coiling of the tail halted when he turned the attention onto her. Remaining silent for a while to think, a light sigh preceeded her reply. "Not really," she admitted. "But I feel like if I think too deeply about what happened, I'll just fall apart. And it's so hard to pick up the pieces afterwards..." Shrugging lightly, she didn't have the words to truly express how scared she had been. Pain and struggle she could handle, but those moments where she could have lost him lay like scattered  piles of broken glass in her memory, glittering and sharp. Recollections to step around, until time could smooth down the edges. Maybe then she'd be able to look at them properly.

Maea

// won't you take me to your heart? //

Tryin' to wash away all the blood I've spilt
This lust is a burden that we both share

Liam supposed that he did have friends in Stormbreak, although more recently it seemed that they’d become scattered over the rest of the world. Perhaps it was simply that he had moved away and come to know people across Caido, but now his friendships stretched across land and sea alike. ”I haven’t done very well with keeping in touch with old friends from Stormbreak,” he admitted. Most of them, after all, were fellow Dragoons, and after what had happened… ”But… maybe I should fix that.”

Holding Maea, pressing his lips gently to her forehead as she sat in silence, Liam waited for her response to his inquiry. And when it came, he paused for a moment before responding, understanding all too well what it was like to handle memories and feelings that seemed too fragile to inspect too closely. ”You don’t have to,” he said, ”But if you want to talk about it - now or later - I’m here. And we can pick up the pieces together.”

Two sinners can't atone from a lone prayer
Souls tied, intertwined by our pride and guilt

Liam

// won't you breathe with me? //

"Only if you want to," she  murmured, knowing too well how one could outgrow friendships like that. Sometimes even the best of intentions didn't matter when lifestyles no longer aligned. There was nothing wrong with letting go, or with building new relations. Ultimately it was Liam's decision, and she was not the best person to ask for advice even if he wanted some.

Wrestling with her own shadows, she shook her head lightly. "It's not that I don't want to talk about it," she sighed. "I dont know... how." How did she express the cold numbness that had settled in her gut from the moment the fyrhunds appeared on the horizon? She compartmentalised so hard that even she had difficulty retrieving those locked up emotions, and though she tried... "It's like staring at a painting and knowing it should make you feel something, but you're not? Because we fought well, and we survived, so it's like my head is trying to say, what does it matter how it felt like in the moment?" It did matter though. Objectively she knew that. She had been scared out of her mind to maybe see Liam vanish beneath a pile of hounds, and in a brief instance she'd been confronted with the possibility of surviving him. The kind of ghosts that summoned - they weren't easy to vanquish.

Unaware that her shoulders were hiking up toward her ears in a defensive huddle, her fingers tightened around his shirt. "I don't think I can do that again. Start over, find meaning... if you're not there, I – " Her breath hitched. No, she didn't think, she knew. Despite all the friends she had and despite the warm glow of Shii against her awareness; now that she knew the warmth of his presence, a life without him would be an endless desert she wouldn't want to endure.
It was a terrifying notion, for one who had given up everything to simply stay alive. What a weakness it was to love someone like that. What a strength, to feel like everything was possible as long as he was there. 

"... I love you."

Maea

// won't you take me to your heart? //

Tryin' to wash away all the blood I've spilt
This lust is a burden that we both share

Maea’s shoulders began to rise as the Ancient began to almost physically curl in on herself. Remembering how her gentle massage had helped him to relax, and wanting to bring her the same, Liam began to rub slow, soothing circles on her back. He thought he knew what she meant, though: how difficult it was to put into words something that was felt so keenly, only for it to have proven unnecessary in the end. They might have survived, and therefore their fear might now be meaningless, but that didn’t mean that it hadn’t been important at the time. And he might have tried to put that into words - that he understood, that it was okay - if not for her next words.

Liam’s breath hitched in his throat at the admission, his hands stilling on Maea’s back as he processed the profound declaration that she’d made. And it was without hesitation that he responded: ”I love you, too.” He reached up, brushing her hair back over her shoulder, cupping her face tenderly in his hands. ”I will be there,” he said, meeting her gaze squarely. ”Whatever it takes.” Wherever Maea went, Liam would follow - no matter who or what stood in the way.

Two sinners can't atone from a lone prayer
Souls tied, intertwined by our pride and guilt

Liam

// won't you breathe with me? //

He filled her vision, a figure of shadow and gold outlined by the soft glow of flickering lamplight. Like a halo, like he might have been some divine being - only not as untouchable. She felt him, properly present with his hands reaching up to cup her face with an intensity about him that stole her breath away. The soothing trace of warmth along her back kept her relaxed, slumped against his chest as though he was all that held her up in this moment.

His words reached her slowly, softly. Sinking down through every barrier she'd ever built around her heart, past the numbness and lingering trepidation, until they settled right across her heart. She didn't need to be Attuned to know his heart; she felt it, was surrounded by it - and could only hope that her own feelings came across half as clearly.
"Mhm. I know you will."

She couldn't look a way from him, didn't want to either. Inextricably drawn in, Maea lifted her chin ever so slightly, lips parting in a quest for his mouth. It wasn't a burn so much as an ache, now; a need as visceral as drawing air into lungs or drinking when thirsty. She needed him, more than words could express –

Maea

// won't you take me to your heart? //

Tryin' to wash away all the blood I've spilt
This lust is a burden that we both share

She loved him. She loved him. She loved him.

The words took up their own beat against his ribs, like a second heartbeat timed to the first. He was spellbound, watching her with a quiet intensity that betrayed exactly how he felt about her. There would be no need to guess, not now nor in the future - Liam would spend every day, every moment they were together showing her precisely what words could never convey clearly enough. He might have moved to do just that, but Maea moved first, lifting her chin and parting her lips -

And Liam leaned forward to claim them in a kiss, wanting - no, needing - to pour everything he was and everything he had promised into it. He kissed her hungrily, a fierce ache spreading through him like wildfire from the first touch of her lips to his. She was everything, and he wanted to give her all of him in return.

Two sinners can't atone from a lone prayer
Souls tied, intertwined by our pride and guilt

Liam

// won't you breathe with me? //

Yes. This. This was what she needed. Every hungry kiss, every press of his mouth against hers pushed that numbness further and further away, leaving her raw and fully connected. Her breath hitched, half a sob as she pressed herself slowly against him. Her breasts ached at the contact. Sent arrows of pleasure through her body, to pool as heat between her legs. She couldn't have said what was different from any other time he'd kissed her, but something was; she, perhaps, or he, or just the quality of the air in this secret hideaway beneath the earth.

No less passionate than this soldier who loved her –loved her, loved her – Maea's mouth parted for him, her tongue quicksilver soft as it sampled his lower lip. Inviting to dance, to taste, to devour - she'd give him anything he wanted, if he just didn't stop.

Maea

// won't you take me to your heart? //

Tryin' to wash away all the blood I've spilt
This lust is a burden that we both share

More. He wanted more.

Was she as wholly undone by this kiss as he was? Liam kissed her with abandon, his own breath hitching as Maea pressed herself against him; her breasts pressed against his chest, and he ran his hands down her back, pulling her closer still with one hand. The other skimmed across her thigh, slipping just barely beneath the silken material of her shift - just enough that he could palm bare skin, grazing his thumb across her inner thigh.

She skimmed her tongue across his lower lip and he groaned, his own tongue flicking out to meet hers. He wanted her, so badly that it ached, and yet he made no move to press her further. Not without her permission. Still, the unspoken promise of more lingered on the tip of his tongue, tracing its way down her neck to nip at her collarbone.  ”Tell me to stop,” he rasped between kisses. ”And I’ll stop.”

Two sinners can't atone from a lone prayer
Souls tied, intertwined by our pride and guilt

Liam

// won't you breathe with me? //

Undone, unravelling; a moth to his flame and helpless to resist the sweet burn anymore. A laughably short battle it had been, yet she didn't care, didn't care - all she wanted was his skin against hers, the taste of him on her tongue. Sliding her tongue against his, the way he groaned had her spine arching in response; yielding easily to his hand upon her back. The thumb sliding up her thigh dragged a little grasp from her throat; rouch callouses scraped against silk-soft skin, so briefly that she shifted restlessly under his fingertips. Willing him to continue.

The cavernous room spun around her, flipping on its head; she let her own fall back to make room for Liam's lips, the sweet euphoria painted upon her throat almost more than she could bear. The offer he gave her sounded like a threat this time and Maea's hands shot up to close around his neck, threading into his hair as though he might try to leave her like this.

"Don't," she whimpered, breath coming faster now. "Don't stop – " She wanted him, needed him, and this time she didn't hesitate.

Maea

// won't you take me to your heart? //