the wounds are open and bleeding out

I swear I still believe but I don't know

It doesn't even hurt that much. That's the worst fucking part.

If he'd been beaten beyond his ability to fight, or had his arm hacked off, or been sent to some void realm where he could do nothing about the theft of the rapier, that would have been one thing. But to get up with a few cracked ribs and an empty hand?

Ronin can barely stand himself, let alone put himself around other people.

But it isn't just about him, and he needs to spread the word about the weapon he's just handed to the Family.

When he calls for Remi - and he does, eventually - the Bastion will undoubtedly have realised already that something is wrong from the spike in the Knight's heartbeat against his finger. His pulse still thunders now, even after he'd limped to the Tramezzino, poured a large drink of waterfall gin from one of their stashes, and sat himself down on the overgrown step.

His husband will arrive dragged via the Rescue magic they share to see Ronin and his empty glass, blood still flecked across his stubbled jaw, his hands busily working on a sketch of Pierce in as much painstaking detail as he can remember. He might be useless in a fight nowadays, but his mind still works, at least.

the white knight

the bastion

How do I learn my dreams to mold
To lay them bare in the morning cold?

It's a strange thing, to be married to a man like Ronin.

For all the times the thunderous pulse of their wedding bands means something, it just as often doesn't. Was Ronin in mortal peril? Or was he merely blowing off some steam going for a run directly up a cliff face? Or fighting off a few pesky dragons who'd grown used to having the Cordillera back to themselves? Having paused his afternoon reading to consider precisely this, there was a split second as Remi felt the tendrils of their shared Rescue Magic begin to grab hold of him, for worry to set in.

Not panic; not yet anyway, but as Remi appeared in the relatively warm alpine meadow of their former home, it was with his magic net already cast out and wings unfurling from his sides.

Only..

With a breath lodged in his throat, Remi straightens. There, upon their old porch, sits his husband. There's blood flicking his lips and the front of his shirt to be sure, but where the Knight was concerned that wasn't always a cause for concern. Had it been only that and the empty cocktail glass and sketchbook, the Bastion might have sighed out the breath he was holding had it not been for the roar of pain that snarled through the attuned bond sharply enough to have Remi gasping.

"Hey." Rushing toward the Knight, Remi sinks down before him, not daring to ask the dilapidated boards of their porch to bear both of their weights at once. Reaching for Ronin's hand, the Bastion tries to take stock of the situation but finds that the slightly pained tilt of his husband's posture didn't account for the too-deep waters of despair threatening to drown him. "Hey, I'm here."

If they're still out there then the chasm grows
For all you know, for all you've known

Code blatently stolen from queen of codes, Sky!

I swear I still believe but I don't know

"Don't--"

Ronin's voice is rough to his own ears, though the warning isn't quick enough to stop Remi from taking his hand and feeling the raw and undiluted tides of his anger and guilt. He'd barely been able to look up at the other man's arrival, the angelic spread of his wings and the reassurance of his presence not something he feels like he deserves. Not when he could have used those precious seconds spent in fire and rage to bring him here sooner, to make a difference, to potentially stop all this.

Instead, with his fingers held loosely in Remi's and the charcoal falling back to the parchment, he nods at the completed sketch. "Another member of The Family," he grates out. "His name is Pierce - I met him a few seasons ago, at the... the Bone Bridges, I think, in the Grounds. He was here when I arrived. He took..." He bites the inside of his cheek hard enough to taste blood.

"The rapier is gone, Remi."

the white knight

the bastion

How do I learn my dreams to mold
To lay them bare in the morning cold?

Ronin could don't all he liked.

Holding the Knight's hand all the more tightly for the lack of reciprocation, Remi walks himself forward on his shins, bullying his way between his husband's knees to try and force Ronin's gaze to meet his. Remi cares little for the sketchbook balanced on the Knight's thigh or the charcoal in his other hand even though he could feel the threads of their importance through the bond they shared. Glancing only vaguely at the man on the page, no doubt Ronin will feel the way the Bastion's mind can barely focus on anything save for the blackened waters swirling through the bond, before Remi's hands still in their desperate clutching of Ronin's.

In a place so overgrown and with Ronin so outwardly still it was impossible to say whether or not time slowed or stopped altogether, but certainly it felt that way. Aware of the clicking of his jaw and the sound of his own gulp as he swallowed hard, Remi forces out a shaky breath. "Gone." He repeats his emotions a clumsy mixture of horror and confusion, before glancing sharply over his shoulder and looking around their little clearly as if expecting to see the man in Ronin's sketchbook suddenly walking toward them.

"But..." Frowning, Remi's lips part silently for a moment before he finds the words he wants. "..he didn't kill you?"

If they're still out there then the chasm grows
For all you know, for all you've known

Code blatently stolen from queen of codes, Sky!

I swear I still believe but I don't know

"Yeah. Gone." Ronin doesn't mean to snap, but gods, having to repeat it - that the rapier had been lost, that he'd been the one to fuck up and let it slip through his fingers - is enough to bring that fury and frustration straight to the surface. "I knew I shouldn't have kept it with me." It doesn't matter that his reluctance to keep the weapon had been everything to do with his fear of hurting Remi and nothing to do with losing it, but in his muddled and thorny mind, the dots are joining all wrong.

The sketchbook slips from his thigh as Remi positions himself between his knees, his hands cold and stained with charcoal where his husband holds onto them so tightly. From where it lands, the portrait of Pierce all but sneers up at them, and Ronin avoids looking at it too closely.

"He didn't have to. The sword was what he was after. They must've figured out what happened at Starfall with it." Ronin shakes his head, jaw tightening. "I've never been hit like that, Remi. I couldn't do a damn thing." He's had the world flip out from beneath him, had bones fracture and his ears ring and the breath driven from his lungs, but he's never been rendered useless, unable to move or act. "He just took it and left."

He probably didn't want to run the risk of Ronin getting it back, in truth, but the Knight is in no position to think that way.

the white knight

the bastion

How do I learn my dreams to mold
To lay them bare in the morning cold?

Remi's fingers flinch against Ronin's, not because of the Knight's tone of voice, but as if he might grab hold of the anger as it flares out of him, pinning it in place that Ronin might see that it wasn't anything to be ashamed of. "I suppose I thought they'd try and weaken us even more by taking you out as well." The Bastion says with a lopsided shrug before his gaze is caught upon the too-sharp line of Ronin's jaw, the clenching of his muscles like some crumbling tower whose collapse was all but inevitable. Taking in the fractured blue of his husband's eyes against the spray of blood still smeared across his lips, Remi thinks to reach up and wipe it away before thinking better of it.

"I know what that's like." Pressing his forehead against his husband's knees, Remi sighs softly as memories of his first trip to Starfall flicker behind his closed eyes. The helplessness and utter defeat had been something he was unable to fully shake, and if the Bastion agreed at all that the Knight shouldn't have been the one to keep the rapier, it was only because this weight was never meant to be his to bear.

"You're the fastest of us." Remi mumbles into the dark space between his husband's knees. "I suppose if it was anyone else, there wouldn't have even been blood." There would have been no back and forth, no dodging of blows, no single moment of hope where everything might have changed if only the dice things had been a little bit different.

If they're still out there then the chasm grows
For all you know, for all you've known

Code blatently stolen from queen of codes, Sky!

I swear I still believe but I don't know

"Clearly they didn't think I was much of a threat without the sword," Ronin mutters; not that he even blames them, given how all of his most potent abilities mean next to nothing to The Family. Breaking his staring contest with the middle distance at the feel of his husband's forehead pressed against his knees, the Knight finally lets one of his hands move so he might smooth his fingers through the other man's curls.

"Fuck." He sighs, the realisation just as stinging as the black feeling leeching through his every pore. "Of course you do. Sorry." Remi had been the first of them to taste The Family's power, after all. (Though he'd not been foolish enough to put a powerful relic into their hands, unlike Ronin, his conscience reminds him).

His fingers thread through the back of Remi's hair and down towards the nape of his neck, Ronin finally letting his eyes fall shut. "Not fast enough," he says quietly, his shrug a barely there thing. "We need to get it back."

the white knight

the bastion

How do I learn my dreams to mold
To lay them bare in the morning cold?

Saying nothing as bitterness gets the better of the Knight, Remi only nods comfortingly knowing that right now was less about saying the right thing and more about simply being whatever it was Ronin needed most from him. If he wanted to take to the sky and fly until his lungs burned, Remi would be right there beside him. If he wanted to track down a few dragons and see how many he could face at once, Remi would keep a tally.

Softly sighing into the feeling of fingers in his curls, it's only reluctantly that Remi looks up, but when he does, there's nothing but boyish affection in his pale stare. "You don't need to apologize. I only meant to say that I know how this feels." Shifting his shoulders to draw his wings back inside now that he was quite sure that there was no present danger, Remi shifts to the side, sitting down on the lower step before dragging Ronin's hand to his lips.

"And we will." The Bastion vows, the promise deposited directly onto his husband's knuckles. "Right now I am just glad that you're alive." No doubt the Family was unable to permanently kill the Knight, but the thought of enduring any amount of time without him scared Remi more than the loss of the rapier.

If they're still out there then the chasm grows
For all you know, for all you've known

Code blatently stolen from queen of codes, Sky!

I swear I still believe but I don't know

Loving and hating the way Remi manages to ground him regardless of the circumstances, Ronin's sigh is long and hard, dragging his shoulders down even if they are no less tense for it. With his brows knotted in a frown as sad as it is guilty, he lets a thumb brush across the Bastion's cheek as he glances up at him, offering a smile that doesn't come near his eyes. "You're too good to me," he mutters, lettings his fingers clasp the other man's properly at last.

"I just wish I could have done more," he hisses, squeezing Remi's hand a fraction and trying to stem the light that risks splintering out of him with the force of his emotions. It might be disingenuous to want to have walked away with more evidence of his brawl with Pierce on his body, but gods, at least then it would feel as though he'd given a worthwhile fight in defence of the relic he'd stolen away.

Glancing back at the other man, it's the fear that finally seems to crack through Ronin's self-pity, and it's his turn to lift Remi's hands to his lips. "Yeah," he agrees in a low voice. "You're right. At least I'm still alive to feel shitty about it."

the white knight

the bastion

How do I learn my dreams to mold
To lay them bare in the morning cold?

"Only because you have shown me how." Remi counters easily, having been the beneficiary of an infinite amount of love and reassurance over the years that if it came second nature to him at all, it was only because Ronin has served as a shining example of how best to be during hard times.

No doubt had Ronin scarcely been able to breathe or better yet, if he'd come knocking on the death's door inside of Remi's mind, things would have been easier to bear. He took the rapier; I nearly died was a far more palatable tale than was, he hit me twice and walked off. That it wouldn't have made a difference in the long run didn't matter, and so despite the truth of it Remi only nods his understanding. "I know. Every time we encounter them, it's like...I lose a little bit more hope in this." Despite what Flora and her crew had done in the Oerwoud, that Pierce was still faster than the Knight?

Gods.

Glancing up, the half-chuckle that has a breath huffing from Remi's nose sees his shoulders properly melting with relief to feel even a flicker of his Ronin clawing its way through the darkness. "How do you know, do you think?" Splayin his fingertips through Ronin's in order to press his thumb against the Knight's lips, Remi frowns. "About the sword? About finding you up here?"

If they're still out there then the chasm grows
For all you know, for all you've known

Code blatently stolen from queen of codes, Sky!

I swear I still believe but I don't know

"Enough," Ronin says fondly, the words mumbled against Remi's thumb, and he lowers their hands if only to brush his fingers across the back the other man's knuckles. "Well, apologies to be the reason for you to have even less hope than before, since I just handed them death on the point of a blade." Sighing and casting his gaze once more back to the sketchbook, he shakes his head. "We can get the word out about him at least. Make Pierce as obvious as you did Dahlia."

For all the good it had done, with the Reaper presiding over Stormbreak and waltzing into any meeting she likes, unwelcome and uninvited. The feeling has fresh bitterness coiling in Ronin's gut, as much as he tries to crush it down so it doesn't infect Remi through their bond and their touch. "Gods, it could be anything," he says of how Pierce had known about the sword. "Maybe they have all of Starfall tapped. Maybe it was Vox." The Family's voice certainly seemed to know anything and everything when it suited him.

"I don't know where to go from here," he confesses, his voice quiet and uncertain. "I don't... there was nothing I could do, Remi. I never want to feel like that again."

the white knight

the bastion

How do I learn my dreams to mold
To lay them bare in the morning cold?

Smiling smugly up at the Knight, Remi raises his eyebrows as he exhales, sending a curl bouncing across his forehead. "Well, not real death, anyway." He points out with a small shrug before following his husband's gaze down toward the all-but-forgotten sketchbook.

"Hey, hey." Squeezing Ronin's hand against the renewed flush of bitterness and animosity, Remi fixes his husband with a shit-eating grin. "Enough." He hums teasingly, before pulling back one of his hands if only to ruffle it unhappily through his curls. The fact that they were bested at nearly every turn was not something he welcomed. At least when it came to the war before they knew who and what they were fighting. But to be so summarily beaten? And more than once?

"No," the Bastion agrees quietly as he nibbles at the inside of his cheek. "Can I moot an idea? Well, then I propose we never do anything or go anywhere without the other, ever again, for the rest of our lives." Lifting his eyebrows as if this was an entirely reasonable suggestion, he grins. "That way we're not likely to be suddenly outnumbered, and, you know, then we can share in the misery together next time."

Letting some of the amusement soften his features, Remi glances over his shoulder at the portrait of Pierce. "But..you said you'd met him before? And...I take it nothing seemed out of the ordinary then?"

If they're still out there then the chasm grows
For all you know, for all you've known

Code blatently stolen from queen of codes, Sky!

I swear I still believe but I don't know

"Not for us," Ronin murmurs; as a demigod of life, of course he automatically considers those who don't have immortality to fall back upon. And it would be easy to fall into that rabbit hole, but luckily Remi cuts him off - and besides, The Family could demonstrably cause untold damage to their loved ones with or without Wilde's Rapier, given how easily the two Taliesins had been bested. Grumbling to himself in response to the other man's teasing and managing another faint smile, it's only because they'll likely break the step and fall right through it if he tugs Remi into his lap that Ronin rises to his feet instead.

"I think that's probably the best idea you've ever had," he mutters, drawing the Bastion with him so he might be able to sink properly into his arms, Ronin's head dropping to rest on his shoulder. "I should have called you as soon as he took a swing at me," he mumbles into the side of his neck; that guilt, at least, can't be assuaged. It had been a mis-step on Ronin's part, and not one he plans to make again.

Slipping his hands into Remi's back pockets and letting his eyes drop shut, Ronin can only nod in response to the other man's questions. "Mm, it was in the Hollowed Grounds. The void was just working its way in from the Greatwood. Looking back I can see all kinds of red flags, but at the time... it was just a conversation. A quick one. He really could've been anyone."

the white knight

the bastion

How do I learn my dreams to mold
To lay them bare in the morning cold?

Tilting his chin as Ronin stands as if waiting for permission to rise with a crooked smile on his face, only as his hand is tugged does he follow suit, immediately wrapping his arms around his husband's shoulders and drawing him close. It was the sort of hug that spoke of safety and understanding, of the sort of love that had endured the worst and been blessed with the best, able to weather whatever storm came its way. "Mmmm, well then I am going to hold you to it. Just like this." Remi murmurs in agreement, curling one of his hands through his husband's dark hair and feeling the bits of soil and grass likely left there from a fall.

"Mm, you should have. Then at least I could gloat about having taken a few bruises on your behalf." Remi jokes, chuckling softly into the crook of his husband's neck.

"Just like with Dahlia then.." He murmurs, disappointment and frustration clouding through their bond as Remi's jaw silently feathers. "I wonder how many more of them there are, just going about in public because we don't know who they are."

If they're still out there then the chasm grows
For all you know, for all you've known

Code blatently stolen from queen of codes, Sky!