R O N I N
There was no Ocean for Vanya here - not anywhere nearby anyway. And Ronin had looked, for as long as he could after they had finally moved on from the terrible area before the Spire. He had looked, and it had gotten rainier and colder. His coat he had insisted Vanya keep, and since she was barefoot, if she allowed he'd end up scooping her into his arms so he could hunt them out a place to stay. Eventually, out of a need for rest as much as anything else, Ronin chose them a small house that sat squat between two others at the top of a rise in the earth. It gave them a reasonable view... but still no Ocean.
"Sorry, Van. I tried." He smiled softy as he stepped in through the door and (if he had been carrying her) set her down on her feet. The place was dank and cold and in severe need of some TLC, but it was a roof over their head. The ex-captain wasted absolutely no time in stepping forward to try and get a fire started in the hearth, swiping his wet hair out of his face.
"Is this place okay? I mean... it won't look like this for long." He couldn't help but sound guilty. Ronin was certainly not used to living like this, as much as he was a soldier.
Vanya had quite vehemently protested when Ronin insisted that he carry her. She was fine, absolutely fine, even if the ground was harsh on her feet. Shoes were practically a foreign thing to her - they absolutely never wore them on the Siren, and she almost never wore them around Northaven. She never expected it to be a problem.. In fact, Vanya didn’t have anything. She wore those wrappings around her torso, her shorts… that was it. She had no shoes, no other clothing, not her saber, not her cuff (a fact that was intensely confusing, as she was currently not an osprey), not her ship, not her Ocean, not her siblings... She had nothing.
No. No that was wrong. When she finally conceded and let Ronin scoop her up after she flinched again at another sharp rock under her foot.. She sighed into him and had rested her head against him. She had him. She had nothing else, but she had him. Him and.. She pressed a kiss to his neck at his apology. ”Hush,” she said quietly. ”Say sorry again and I’ll kick your ass.” As if he were somehow responsible for this hellscape they found themselves in. He was as trapped and disoriented as the rest of them.
The place he found was something. It’s vantage point was decent, and it was sheltered. Vanya had certainly dealt with worse conditions than this in all her travels, but she couldn’t help her shivering beneath Ronin’s jacket, still wet with rain. As he placed her on the ground, she tried to ignore the way her chest tightened. She let her eyes shut as he moved away towards where he could start a fire, and she let out a trembling breath.
She tried to listen for the Ocean. Tried to feel her somewhere, even within. She fought the trembling in her lips when there was nothing at all. Vanya opened nutmeg eyes and took a deep breath, turning to watch Ronin. She gave him a soft smile and gingerly walked to where he crouched before the hearth, lowering herself beside him. ”Wherever I have you is enough,” she assured him. And it was true. If she never saw the Ocean again, she could find pieces of it tucked into blue eyes and a crooked smile.
Vanya brought her hand up to brush the side of his face, her thumb tracing over his jaw. Something in her fluttered uncertainly, and she leaned forward to brush a soft kiss to his lips. Everything that had held her back before.. Oh, it was long gone. They were together here, and that was all that counted. And… ”We need to talk,” she murmured quietly against his lips before she pulled back, only enough to meet his eyes.
R O N I N
Ronin believed her - wisely, he hushed up with his apologies and flashed Vanya a smile over his shoulder as he got everything together to start a fire. Luckily enough Ronin had appeared in full uniform (meaning he was mercifully well equipped) and, thanks to his horrific interesting time exploring Northaven's jungle, he had recent experience in making fire out of nothing.
A bit of flint, some kindling and patience on his part, and soon he was nursing the tiniest of flames in the hearth. Around them skeletons of wooden furniture hunched together, looking dry enough to use for fuel. But before Ronin could go and fetch any, he turned to find Van kneeling down beside him. A warm smile lit up his face, especially as she spoke, and he nudged her as if to tell her to stop being so mushy.
"I meant it, you know. When I said I love you," he murmured, almost under his breath. He watched the flames for a second, a touch of pink flushing his cheeks, and leant into her touch eagerly. He kissed her back without hesitation, his hand reaching up to rest atop hers, only for something cold and awful to coil deep within him as those words fell from her lips. We need to talk.
"We do...?"
Vanya smiled softly, her heart picking up its pace as she just looked at him for a moment. The small fire crackled softly, joining the sound of rain outside this decrepit shelter that felt so much less hollow when she had cobalt eyes to look at. Her hand was still over the side of his face, and his own hand was warm over the top of hers.
”I love you too, Ronin,” she said quietly. Something about the words held more weight than she thought they would, and she tilted her head at him, thick curls falling over her shoulder. Her smile turned crooked, and she leaned forward to kiss him again, just wanting to feel him closer. She kissed him again. And then again before she leaned back. ”Pretty sure I have for a while now. And I was such an idiot, because I was scared to love you for the stupidest reasons…”
The opinions of her family had been so thoroughly holding her back. Thinking herself some kind of whore had been holding her back. Fear that none of it meant to same to Ronin as it did to her had been holding her back. It felt silly now. Petty.
Vanya took a deep breath and her smile wavered. Her hand that was under his moved away, but she brought his hand with her. Bringing it down until she placed it over her bare stomach that was still wet with rain. His calloused hand was more steadying than she expected.
”I'd gone to the infirmary,” she started again. A smile flickered. ”I don’t know… exactly when.. maybe right before this, maybe I was on my way to see you, I don't remember..” Another deep breath as she glanced down to his hand. By the Ocean, the timing.. she looked back up at him, and she took comfort in him, that he was there. That he loved her, and that whatever she'd thought of love before was wrong, because Ronin was a different sort of love than she'd ever known before.
”I'm pregnant, Ronin. I'm going to have a baby.” The words fell from her barely above a whisper. Her thumb brushed over the top of his hand where it rested on her. ”...our baby.”
Ronin didn't think he would ever get tired of hearing Vanya say those words; while it might surprise some back in Northaven, professions of love were very uncommon for the ex-captain. (That went for both the saying and the hearing in return). The little fire almost sounded cozy in its snapping and crackling, and Ronin leant into Van's touch, the warmth working its fingers under his skin and starting to make him forget about the rain.
He gave as many kisses as she wanted to take, smiling against her lips and letting out a quiet laugh as he realised she wasn't stopping, the former baron resisting the urge to pull her back against him when she did finally pause to speak. "If you're an idiot then I shudder to think what I might be," he remarked. "If it were up to me, though, I'd make sure you never felt scared about anything again..." He was a soldier - that's what he was for, wasn't it?
Then she drew her hand away, Ronin releasing her only to find her capturing his fingers again, drawing them to her... His brow furrowed and he raised an eyebrow at her in confusion, though that was instantly replaced with concern at hearing she'd been to the infirmary. "Are you..."
The words died on his tongue. She wasn't unwell, or hurt. She was... she was going to have...
Ronin felt his breath hitch in his chest, his blue eyes flicking from Vanya's face down to where his fingers were splayed over her bare stomach. "Our baby?"He tried to find more words than that a few times, but the silver in his tongue seemed to be stuck. Eventually he settled on a broad grin that seemed more than a touch dumbstruck, shaking his head in disbelief. "No way. I can't be that lucky," he said in a soft voice, cupping Vanya's cheek in his free hand. "You're serious?"
The way words seemed to fail him did anything but assure her. She cringed a bit with a nod as he glanced from her face and down to where she held his hand. Where there was life that was a little bit of both of them flickering in its beginnings. But then he smiled, and there wasn't even a second's pause between when his started and hers did too. She let out a breathless laugh and leaned into his touch, his calloused hand familiar and near thrilling against her. She hadn't thought to have doubts about him, about whether he'd step up - it was her mother that had left them, not their father, and Ronin was in a different league than Cyphas had ever been.
Vanya brought her own free hand up to where his was and nodded, never taking her eyes from him.. but she was grinning crookedly. ”No,” she said. ”After magically appearing in a frightening new world with almost half the people we know missing and no idea what's happened to us, after telling you that I love you, I am not being serious about this.”
Vanya was still grinning, and the sureality of it was settling in. Her heart fluttered, and where their hands rested over her stomach, she pressed his hand just a little bit lower, just below her navel to where she knew the baby would be in its early stages. The second eldest Hali had raised four of her siblings, so she knew how all of it worked. She was no stranger to this, she would be fine. She told herself that, didn't let herself think further than that. She didn't want to think about how afraid she was… or think about how her siblings were absent, that she couldn't tell them they were to be uncles and an aunt.
Instead she grinned and pressed a kiss to his palm, nutmeg eyes never leaving his. ”We're having a baby, Ronin,” she said, and suddenly it was real and irrevocably true. They were having a baby together.
R O N I N
Ronin must have been finding this difficult to get his head around, because when Vanya said 'no' for a second he believed her (evident by the sudden and boyish shock on his face before she continued). A quiet laugh escaped his lips, the former captain watching with almost wonder on his face as she moved his hand a touch lower. Unlike the osprey he had absolutely no experience with this whatsoever, but he'd always wanted a family. And a family with Vanya... his stomach fluttered with a mix of nerves and delight.
"We are..." The smile wouldn't leave his lips, and he barely noticed the building warmth from the fire. He shifted to slip the hand on Vanya's stomach around her waist, and if she would allow he would draw her into his lap, nudging a few more bits of kindling into the hearth to keep the flames alive. Leaning in, Ronin pressed a soft kiss to her lips, holding her close and letting out a long, shaky sigh. "You sure know how to pick your timing, Van," he said. "But... we'll be alright. I'll make sure of it, okay?"
There was anything but protest from the osprey as he coaxed her forward and into his lap. Vanya near cursed herself for the way her stomach flipped as his hand slid around around her, and his lips pressing softly against hers. She breathed him in, and even when he pulled away she kept her face close to his, brushing her lips against his cheek, her nose grazing over his. The warmth of him, the warmth of the fire.. The chill of the rain was fading, and she met his eyes.
”My timing?” she echoed, furrowing her brows at him and pursing her lips. She poked a finger to the top of his chest, just below the hollow of his throat, and it curled under the top of his shirt. ”Were you never taught where babies come from, Ronin?”
She gave him a taunting sort of smirk, as if humor and smiles could fix everything, could make all of this okay. Starting a family with him, having his baby… that she would never change. This place.. This place was scary. It was empty and crumbling and foreign. Her cuff was gone, but she remained original. Ronin was here, their child was growing, but her brothers, her sister.. They weren’t here.
Vanya let out a soft sigh and leaned her forehead against Ronin’s. ”I know you will,” she finally said to his promise, and she meant it. Felt it. She stayed there for a moment before she brushed a soft and lingering kiss to him, then leaned back to meet those rich blue eyes of his. ”I need to look for my family,” she said quietly. She was without her ship, her Ocean.. How long could she bear to be away from her family? The last things that had been said between her and Saiden… Her eyes prickled, but she swallowed it back. She wouldn’t cry, she wouldn’t, because he was fine, and she would find him and apologize.
Thunder clapped from outside this decrepit home that had so quickly filled with warmth, and Vanya leaned forward to wrap her arms around his waist from where she sat in his lap, laying her head down on his shoulder with her face turned into the crook of his neck. ”Tomorrow,” she murmured. It would have been useless tonight, and she’d been looking as Ronin tried to find that glittering blue for her. And… she didn’t want to go anywhere just then. Selfishly, she wanted to stay right there with Ronin before the fire, any shivers from the rain bleeding away with the warmth.
She smiled softly. ”Guess this isn’t the cushy stuff you’re used to, is it Baron Taliesin?” she teased.
R O N I N
The warmth built between them deliciously, and for once there was no low kindling of heat that suggested something more; not right now, anyway. Ronin was enthralled by Vanya, losing himself in her nutmeg eyes, in soft, tawny skin, in silken tresses and curves that begged to be touched. His quiet reverie was broken by a prod at his chest, Ronin arching an eyebrow and grinning to her. "I was taught well enough, Vanya," he quipped back - she would know that he was quite well practiced in the act, too. His smile softened. "I suppose I should say the timing, shouldn't I?"
He let his fingertips play over her lower back, taking a second to breathe her in as he leant his forehead back against hers. The ex-captain was run ragged, truthfully. Getting here, searching for any sign of a shore or a border, and finally picking this house (cold and miserable though it may be), and this expected surprise on top of all of it... damn.
Vanya sat back from him and he met her eyes easily, reaching out to let a hand play through her dark curls. "Yes, I know," he said. "I will help you look, until we find every last one of them. We'll figure it out together," he told her, nothing but quiet certainty in his voice, and as she folded into his arms he held her close, pressing a gentle kiss to her hair and kicking another few bits of kindling into the fire to keep feeding it.
"Tomorrow," he agreed, closing his eyes briefly and letting out possibly his first genuine laugh in a long time, in or outside of Northaven. "No, it certainly is not," he said curtly of their meagre surroundings, the former baron purposely putting more emphasis on his accent. "Luckily, my lady, I am a soldier as well as a blueblood, and I think I might cope for tonight. Tomorrow, though, I'd like my needless luxury back."
Together. They would find her family, they would make sense of all this, they would begin their own family - together. She let a deep sigh that seemed expel a measure of her tension with it, and she decided she would think of all of it tomorrow. The day had been shell-shocking surely, and if Vanya was as exhausted as she was.. she nestled her head along his shoulder, her lips gently brushing over that starburst of a scar. But then.. then Ronin laughed. Feeling that, hearing it, and Vanya grinned broadly and fully and laughed herself - she couldn't help it.
She picked up up her head and wrinkled her nose at the posh sound in his voice, but she was still smiling as she glanced around the decrepit house. It didn’t look so cold or so lonely with the warm glow of the fire, long shadows dancing and filling in the empty space where life was supposed to be. The dust was enough to make her cringe.. But she’d clean it. She considered the life growing in her, and resolve gripped her tightly. They would make this a home. They had to.
She looked back at Ronin and smirked. ”Well, darling,” she said. ”I do have one material request before we find you a feather bed.” She adjusted how she sat in his lap, until her legs wrapped around him and her arms looped around his neck. Behind his back, her toes wiggled. ”I never in my life thought I’d say it… but I really need some shoes.”
R O N I N
A broken and decrepit little house it might be for the time being, but the warmth of the fire and the sound of their laughter to fill it, Ronin could easily see the home it might well become in the future. He held Vanya close, his eyes closing at the feel of her lips against the side of his neck, his hands gliding gently over her. He couldn't get enough of her touch, epecially now more than ever, and as she glanced around the werelight of the room he pressed his lips to her cheek, still smiling.
As she glanced up at him he arched an eyebrow curiously, his hands drifting to sit on her hips now, and when she spoke her request he couldn't help but laugh again, leaning in to kiss her sweetly on the lips. "Shoes? You've become a right princess since we got here," he chided playfully. "Shoes you want? Shoes you shall have, even if I have to give you my own." He winked. "For now though, I regret that I will have to leave you by this fire so I can make this place a little more habitable before we sleep."
Vanya scoffed before his lips met hers, smiling into his kiss. ”Princess? Hardly,” she said as he pulled away. ”That’s queen to you.” She certainly had never been the sort for awful things like shoes.. Or most clothing. Life on the sea, upon the Siren’s Call with her brothers, her sister, things like that got in the way, made their jobs harder. Of course they were all lovely, a beautiful family with good genes, so that certainly helped in their confidence. Saiden and Aramis particularly always so full of themselves -
The osprey returned her attention to Ronin then, turning away from thinking about things that made her feel like she was being strangled. Tomorrow. She’d think about it all tomorrow. Her brow furrowed as he mentioned leaving her by the fire, and she pulled herself closer to him with a glare. ”I’m fine right here, thank you,” she grumbled, holding him just a little bit tighter. ”All we need is blankets. The rest can come tomorrow.”
Truly, the fire wasn’t as warm as Ronin was, and she didn’t want to let him go. It wasn’t often she did when they were together, but tonight was quite drastically different from all the time they had spent together in Northaven. They were having a baby together and… would this be the first night of them living together? There was no ship for her fly to, no obligations to fulfill, no expectations to meet. Vanya let out a soft breath and let her eyes glance over Ronin’s face, the way the shadows flickered with the fire that had grown in its strength.
”I love you, Ronin Taliesin,” Vanya said with a smile.
R O N I N
"Queen? Consider myself corrected," Ronin murmured, the firelight catching on the blue of his eyes, which held hers without question. They might not be her thing and she certainly might not have needed them before, but with winter drawing closer and having... well... nothing to hand, Ronin was determined that Vanya would not want for anything. That need to keep her safe burned brightly inside him with a ferocity that he couldn't put into words, and he let a smile ghost across his lips at the mere thought of the life growing inside her.
He had been about to move when she hit him with a glare from warm, nutmeg eyes, Ronin instantly settling back down and seeming puzzled until she spoke. At that he laughed and gathered her closer into his lap, kissing her curls and sliding his arms around her to hold her more securely. "Your wish, my command," he murmured, inhaling the achingly familiar scent of her and closing his eyes.
"And I love you, Vanya Hali," he murmured. Nothing else really mattered, just then.
{END THREAD}
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