(the letter arrives with a small package. Inside is a small kite that is patterned from top to bottom like the transition of the sky from golden sunrise, to blue daylight, to rosy sunset.).
Caly,
I know words aren’t enough for how I hurt you—especially not for ruining your birthday. I wanted that day to be perfect for you. I wanted [i]you[/i] to feel perfect, because that’s how I see you. Instead, I made everything worse, and I hate that more than I can say. I should’ve been better. You deserve better.
I am so, so sorry. I’ll spend as long as it takes proving that to you, if you’ll let me.
I think about you constantly. I miss you more than I know how to explain. I miss all the different sounds of your laugh, and the way you make a room feel alive just by being in it. I miss how brave you are, and how you rival the sun on its best days. Most of all, I miss what I haven’t learned yet. I want to know what your hair looks like first thing in the morning. Whether you hum to yourself when you’re focused. How you like your sandwiches on picnics, and whether or not you save the best bite for last or eat it first. I want to know every single thing that makes you smile—even the tiny ones that barely count. I want to learn all the pieces of you.
I’ll be at the Dreaming Well in King’s End next week. I’ll wait all day. All night. However long it takes. If you come, I’ll tell you anything you want to know. Every thought, every truth, every stupid thing you could want. If you don’t... I’ll understand. Just so you know, no matter what happens, you'll always be in my heart, Caly.
- Kaisel Ashborn
Caly,
I know words aren’t enough for how I hurt you—especially not for ruining your birthday. I wanted that day to be perfect for you. I wanted [i]you[/i] to feel perfect, because that’s how I see you. Instead, I made everything worse, and I hate that more than I can say. I should’ve been better. You deserve better.
I am so, so sorry. I’ll spend as long as it takes proving that to you, if you’ll let me.
I think about you constantly. I miss you more than I know how to explain. I miss all the different sounds of your laugh, and the way you make a room feel alive just by being in it. I miss how brave you are, and how you rival the sun on its best days. Most of all, I miss what I haven’t learned yet. I want to know what your hair looks like first thing in the morning. Whether you hum to yourself when you’re focused. How you like your sandwiches on picnics, and whether or not you save the best bite for last or eat it first. I want to know every single thing that makes you smile—even the tiny ones that barely count. I want to learn all the pieces of you.
I’ll be at the Dreaming Well in King’s End next week. I’ll wait all day. All night. However long it takes. If you come, I’ll tell you anything you want to know. Every thought, every truth, every stupid thing you could want. If you don’t... I’ll understand. Just so you know, no matter what happens, you'll always be in my heart, Caly.
- Kaisel Ashborn
Kaisel
Wearing a watery blue, faded and stretched-out sparkling hair tie on his left wrist
