waiting for your return

I thought you said forever over and over

Liam sat at the kitchen table in his cottage, drumming his fingers on the dark wood. A cup of coffee sat untouched in front of him, and hazel eyes were trained, unseeing, on the door. He'd gotten up that morning, just like every morning before, and made his way to Maea's treehouse, only to find it empty. Again. Disappointment was bitter on his tongue as he made himself take a sip of coffee, only to find that it had grown cold. Making a face, the soldier rose from the table and dumped the rest of the beverage down the drain.

He'd come home after the masquerade, expecting to find Maea there and ready to provide some kind of explanation for why she'd shifted into a dragon in the middle of Ludo's party and subsequently been kicked out. When she didn't immediately return, he'd been only mildly concerned, but thought that perhaps she'd needed to cool off, or maybe she wanted to satisfy her bloodlust before returning, both of which had been fair reasons to stay away. But as days passed, he grew worried. What if something had happened?

What if she never came back?

Fear was an ever-present ghost in the back of his mind as he went about his daily tasks, going through the motions until he thought he might scream from the monotony of it all. He wanted to go looking for Maea, to hunt her down and reassure himself that she was alive and well. But he wouldn't even know where to start. No, the best place for him - the only place for him - was to wait for her. But he'd never been one for twiddling his thumbs, and the strain of it was starting to wear on him. It was a subtle shift, but one that would be noticeable to someone who knew him well: a shadow of stubble on his chin, faint circles beneath his eyes from lack of sleep, slightly tousled hair from where he'd run his hands through it one too many times. Maea would see it on him immediately, the worry - whenever she returned.

If she returned.

Growling with frustration, he made for the door. Sitting inside and sulking would do no one any good. He might as well go chop some firewood outside the cottage while he waited to see if his partner would choose today to return. And if she did, then that's where she would find him: axe in hand, at a chopping block in the front yard, hacking away at blocks of wood in preparation for Deepfrost.

A sleepless night becomes bitter oblivion

Liam

Sing to me, I am not doing well
Getting tired of my own words

The skyship took forever to dock. First there was a holdup at the port, then the crew was going through the passenger list and hauled a stowaway out of the cargo hold, and then they had to wait for the port master to arrive and all the while she felt as if one more delay was all it would take before she exploded. It terrified her. Kept her glued to the railing like she'd been bound hand and foot, made her wait until the gangway was nice and laid out before she exited the ship. On foot. There would be no flying for her from now on; no shifting, no magic, nothing but ordinary, unproblematic walking. Down the winding stairs, past the Observatory, out on the winding bridges that would lead her towards the small cottage where her partner hopefully waited. Passing her own house entirely, she gave herself no grace to rest, or change clothes. If he wasn't home... then she'd check the training ground, and the Bodega, and any of their usual haunts until she found him.

She missed him. The longing was a dull ache that dragged on her limbs, an iron band around the chest that kept her from breathing and erased all color from the day. Vaguely aware of a sun shining and of vibrant leaves clinging on in the last warm days before Deepfrost, it had little to do with her. Not until she found her way around a familiar grove of red maples, past a bramble of blackberries winding up a crooked rowan tree and finally spotted the roof of the house.

The sun shone differently on that piece of land. Brighter, warmer, more real than anything she'd seen in days and weeks. Brilliant rays angled down through balding trees and dyed Liam's hair with gold, turned the axe head into some legendary metal brighter than silver, and she froze on the path, suddenly terrified. It was too lovely a scene. Too bright, too vivid; what if it wasn't real after all? She had concluded already that she couldn't be in her right mind, and wasn't it common for insane people to see things that weren't real? She wanted it to be, though. Wanted to believe that the sound of splitting wood that echoed back from the woodland beyond wasn't just in her head, more than another delusion she'd been telling herself.

It didn't even matter if he was mad at her for being away for so long. He should be - she was mad at herself for far more - and given that she was about to break a deal they'd made she couldn't see this being a nice kind of reunion... But it was fine. At least she'd know it was all real.

Clutching at the wooden box she kept tucked in her pocket, Maea braved a step forward, then another. Travel worn and dusty, the shoulder of her dress - the same she'd worn to the masquerade - was torn and hastily mended, the long hair hanging limp around a face too pale even for her; she looked a mess, and he would be forgiven in thinking even for a second that she'd returned as a ghost to haunt him.

She shuddered at the thought of how close that came to the truth.

"Liam?"

Sing to me, cause I can't hear myself
through the loudness of my own hurts

base inspired by Odd <3

I thought you said forever over and over

Liam?

Her voice was in his head, he was sure of it. He was imagining things, wishing that she would appear. Maybe he'd finally gone mad, and this was the result.

But then he looked up.

Maea stood a short distance away in the costume from the masquerade, her long hair hanging limply around her pale face. Her dress was torn at the shoulder, though she'd had time to mend it; a layer of dust seemed to have settled upon her, perhaps from her travels. She was, in no uncertain terms, a mess - and yet, she'd never appeared more beautiful to Liam than she did at that moment. She was here. She was alive.

"Maea," he breathed.

His axe thudded into the chopping block, missing the log he'd been about to half entirely. He closed the distance between them in a few long strides, sweeping Maea into a tight embrace that simultaneously cradled her like something precious and threatened to crush her against his ribs. Then he drew back, his hands resting on her shoulders. Worried eyes skimmed her from head to toe and back again, checking for signs of injury, noting any place where she didn't seem entirely herself. "Are you alright?" Not where have you been or why did you leave me or any of the other thoughts swirling through his mind. Those were secondary, questions to be asked and answered later. First and foremost: "Are you hurt?"

A sleepless night becomes bitter oblivion

Liam

Sing to me, I am not doing well
Getting tired of my own words

Wincing as the axe missed its target, she half expected it to continue past the log and into a kneecap. That would be a suitable conclusion to the general mess she'd made of things. Fortunately, no blood was shed in celebration of her homecoming. No tears either; not yet. They only burned behind her eyelids as Liam's gaze found hers, clouded over with a worry she'd never seen in him before. She'd done that - had drawn those shadows beneath his eyes, and cultivated the sort of desperation that brought him across the yard like he had learned to teleport.

Air whooshed from her lungs as she was swept up in his embrace. A brittle sound followed with, somewhere between pain and relief; he was real. Warm and solid and there, his chest a rock for her to lean against when her knees threatened to give away. The way she clung to him was equally as crushing, tiny fists closing around the back of his shirt so that even if he let go she'd be sticking to him like a burr.

"No," she answered, too raw to be anything but honest with him. She was not alright. "I was... but it's healed. I'm so sorry, Liam, I made such a mess of everything." And that was putting it mildly.

Sing to me, cause I can't hear myself
through the loudness of my own hurts

base inspired by Odd <3

I thought you said forever over and over

Maea clung to him, and Liam could have cried with relief because she was here, and she was real, and this wasn't some sleep-deprived hallucination that proved he'd finally lost his mind. She hadn't left him - willingly or otherwise - and she'd come back to him, just as she'd promised that she always would. And there was nothing that they couldn't fix, now that they were together again. Her absence hardly mattered as long as she was alright, as long as she wasn't hurt -

No, she said, and he immediately stiffened, the worry in his eyes deepening into something bordering on feral. He reached one hand to brush her cheek with the back of his knuckles, a gesture that was deceptively calm in the wake of his sudden urge to protect - and to maim and slaughter anyone who had dared to touch her. He clenched his jaw so hard it ached. "Who hurt you?" he asked, hazel eyes piercing hers as he searched for answers. "Maea, what happened?"

A sleepless night becomes bitter oblivion

Liam

Sing to me, I am not doing well
Getting tired of my own words

Oh the irony. What would he do when he realized that the true author of her suffering was none other than herself? She loved him desperately for the thunderous silence that demanded a name to take vengance on, and for the way his hands remained kind even with emotions surging high, but it was utterly misplaced. There were no villains in this story. Only foolishness and grief and too many mistakes to count.

Drawing a shuddering breath, Maea closed her eyes against the intensity of his gaze and leaned hger cheek into his touch, craving the heat against skin that was colder than usual. "It was my own fault.  I fought with Thalassa at the part, that's why I was kicked out. Afterwards I had to cool my head, so I flew... just flew. I was on my way back when I ran into a griffin." Her mouth twisted, a curling of the lips that screamed of self deprecation and disgust. "For some reason I decided it was a good idea to mess with it. Only, it turned out to be Noah, who happens to hate dragons with a passion. It... didn't go well. But he was able to get me to Haulani, and the healing fountain. He didn't know it was me," she added quickly, afraid that the incident would inflame the relation between the two men. She didn't want that. Couldn't bear the thought that she'd cause such a thing by hehr recklessness.

Sing to me, cause I can't hear myself
through the loudness of my own hurts

base inspired by Odd <3

I thought you said forever over and over

To Liam's credit, he didn't immediately storm to the skyport on the first ship to Halo to find Noah and demand an explanation, though it was a very near thing. The rational part of him knew that the Sentinel had been friendly towards Maea, and even if he hadn't been, Liam knew the man well enough to know that he would never have hurt her knowingly. But that protective, possessive streak that Maea apparently brought to the surface was not rational, and it took a great deal of effort to remain standing with his partner rather than seeking out someone on whom to exact vengeance.

Hearing her blame herself was somehow worse than hearing her blame someone else. Liam tucked a lock of hair behind her ear with a shaking hand that betrayed his myriad emotions: anger at Thalassa, who seemed to have been the catalyst for the entire thing; relief that Noah had managed to heal Maea, even if it had taken her to Torchline; guilt that he hadn't stuck by her side to prevent any of it from happening in the first place.

Letting out a shaky breath, Liam cupped Maea's face in his hands. "I don't blame you," he told her. He hesitated, and then added, "And I don't blame Noah." Thalassa, though... Thalassa, he could blame. And maybe that was just to avoid the truth: that above all, he somehow blamed himself.

A sleepless night becomes bitter oblivion

Liam

Sing to me, I am not doing well
Getting tired of my own words

She felt the tension in his spine, sensed it shift and fluctuate with her recounting of the events. Perhaps it would have been better if it found a release somehow, just as it would have been better if she could have cried that day, soaked to the bone in the fountain, but they had no such luck. Too used to internalising problems, they were equally good at swallowing down sadness and rage and letting it fester. That Liam didn't blame any of them was a relief, but the silence that hovered where a third person could have been mentioned spoke volumes to Maea. She sighed.

"It wasn't Thal's fault," she admitted, though with a slight reluctance. "I bothered her, and then fucked up when I tried to start over... I shouldn't have lost my temper." Reaching up, she covered one of his hands with her own, savoring the feel of sun-tanned skin and calloused fingers under her fingertips. Turning her head aside she brushed her lips against his palm; soothing him or herself, or maybe both at once.

Sing to me, cause I can't hear myself
through the loudness of my own hurts

base inspired by Odd <3

I thought you said forever over and over

Perhaps it would have been better if there was an outlet for the rage that simmered beneath the surface, so unlike Liam that later he would wonder where it had come from. But it all went back to previous losses, and the fear of losing Maea, too, the terrifying possibility that he was simply cursed to lose everyone he'd ever loved to some tragic fate or other. He hadn't been able to protect his wife or children - but gods be damned if he wasn't going to protect Maea with everything he had to offer. And maybe that was what it all boiled down to in the end: he wasn't angry with Maea, or Noah, or even Thalassa. He was angry that he was never enough to keep those he loved safe.

Maea's hand covered his, her head turning so that she could brush her lips against his palm, and just like that, the fight left Liam. All he wanted to do now was to make sure that Maea was alright - or as close to alright as she could be. Whatever it took, he would help her, care for her, until that haunted look in her eye left and his Maea returned.

"I... won't blame Thal," he said begrudgingly, his voice gruff but genuine. His thumb stroked Maea's cheek. She looked like she could use a rest, what with her tattered outfit and the way exhaustion lined her body. "Do you want to come inside? Or would you rather go to the treehouse?"

A sleepless night becomes bitter oblivion

Liam

Sing to me, I am not doing well
Getting tired of my own words

And so begrudgingly it was no one's fault but her own, and that was how Maea preferred it. If she could control nothing but herself and her own actions in this life, then let her at least take responsibility for herself, however late it was in the coming. Maybe she would be able to let go of the blame towards herself too, some day, but at least for now she needed it to hurt, to check her, to remind her of how quickly even good intentions could go sideways if she let go of consideration or care. Liam's assurance spared her from seeing her wildfires spread any further, and she hugged him tighter, a tired but grateful smile offering the first glimmer of relief at being back, home, safe.

"I want to be where you are. And maybe take a bath... here or there doesn't matter," she replied, feeling the exhaustion like a weight dragging her down, making the simplest things a slog to deal with. "Choose for me, please?" Normally she had no trouble with deciding such simple things, but the tumultuous events had taken their toll on her. Even separating from Liam to walk into the house felt like an insurmountable effort - even if she could be persuaded to let go of him. That alone might require some persuasion.

Sing to me, cause I can't hear myself
through the loudness of my own hurts

base inspired by Odd <3

I thought you said forever over and over

Liam would never fault Maea for whatever had happened at the masquerade, or for what had come after it, but he also sensed that he would be quite unable to shake the idea of blame from his partner's mind at present. Gods knew that he'd clung to blame of his own for far longer than was necessary. Instead of trying to argue, he let the matter slide for now, choosing to focus instead on the fact that Maea was home and safe. At the realization that this was truly the outcome of his days of worry, the soldier returned her faint smile and hugged her closer, allowing his relief to soak into the embrace.

"Stay here with me," Liam suggested softly. She was already here, after all, and she looked like the simple effort it would take to make it to the treehouse might knock her over. "I'll take care of everything." And with that, Liam moved to scoop his partner into his arms and carry her inside.

Kicking the door shut behind them, he took her through the living area and into the bathroom, where he set her gently on her feet. Keeping a hold of her with one hand - as though afraid that if he let her go, she might disappear - he turned the tap for the hot water and let it begin to fill the tub. While it would be scalding (too hot for him by far), he hoped that the warmth would bring some life back into Maea. "I can go start dinner, or I can stay with you," he offered softly. "But either way, I'll need to go find you something to wear."

A sleepless night becomes bitter oblivion

Liam

Sing to me, I am not doing well
Getting tired of my own words

Rarely did she ever allow herself to be pampered, but today was different. This time she didn't protest at being scooped up and carried inside; she simply nodded in a tiny bob of her head and cradled her arms around Liam's neck, relief awash in her veins and so potent that she nearly cried. Nearly... but still no tears fell. They had turned to stone deep within, calcified in jagged lines that pricked and chafed, refusing to yield. Maybe in time they could be weathered down into something soft like forgiveness... maybe.

"Stay," Maea requested quietly, " else I might fall asleep." And she didn't want to be alone anymore. Had done that enough, and see what came out of it! When everything she needed was right here, beating steadily in the chest beneath her cheek; willing to weather any storm with her - what a fool she was to ever think she needed to be alone.

Reluctantly accepting the need to stand on her own for a moment, she began to undo the fastenings of her ripped and stained robe, then recalled the contents hidden in its side pocket.
"Before I forget... I have something for you." Tense worry knotted in her gut, but the smile she turned on Liam was carefully light and unbothered, the way she had practiced a hundred times on the journey home. Flora's advice came in handy now, the one time she needed to lie to her lover. "Close your eyes - and hold out your hand."

How her voice kept from trembling she would never know. Her fingers certainly did, as they fumbled for the simple wooden box Theea had lent her, and the precious content within.

Sing to me, cause I can't hear myself
through the loudness of my own hurts

base inspired by Odd <3

I thought you said forever over and over

He would stay with Maea for as long as she wanted, and he nodded his agreement with a quick smile as he bustled about the bathroom. The water that filled the tub was indeed scalding, and Liam hissed softly as he stuck a hand under the faucet to confirm as much. Shaking the hand to rid it of beads of water that had collected, he turned his attention to gathering up a towel (the largest and fluffiest that he had in his possession) and some soap, leaving it all near the tub so that Maea could take her time without having to worry about hunting down the basic necessities of a bath.

He was so busy making sure he had everything that he might not have noticed even if Maea's voice had shaken or her expression had given her away; as it was, though, there was nothing in her countenance to suggest that she'd done anything other than gotten him a gift. When she would have found time between the masquerade, being injured, and coming home, he had no idea, but he paused in his bustling to turn towards her regardless. "You didn't have to get me anything," he protested softly. "Just coming home is precious enough." But he dutifully closed his eyes anyway, holding out a hand as he'd been instructed and waiting for whatever it was that Maea wished to give him.

A sleepless night becomes bitter oblivion

Liam

Sing to me, I am not doing well
Getting tired of my own words

The rushing water tumbling into the bath muffled her nervous swallow and disguised the rustle of silk over wood as she withdrew the box. "I wanted to," she replied, which was true enough; this was something she had intended to do for him ever since she found out that he had been infected by the Void. He wouldn't agree to it, if he knew; she had accepted that much. Or rather, whatever lived inside him would fight the purge, if given half a chance. So after careful consideration and countless imagined scenarios, this was the only one she could think of that wouldn't end in a physical altercation.

Wasting no time, she checked to ensure that Liam's eyes indeed were closed before she cracked open the lid of the box. Nestled upon a napkin lay a rose, red as blood and brushed with gold, its thorns sharp enough to draw blood with nary a touch. That's what she counted on. That's what Maea hoped for, as she carefully lifted it out of the container and placed it upon her lover's outstretched palm. Bracing his hand so it wouldn't fall away, she hastily pressed the thorny stem down, breathlessly watching for a reaction; anything to suggest his skin actually got pierced by the healing flower.

---

Maea attempts to use her Vi's Rose to cure Liam!

Vi's Roses (rare): A beautiful crimson flower with thorns of deep gold, it is rumoured that these roses are coloured with Vi's lifeblood. When planted, they have the ability to cleanse the area around them.
Type: Light | Style: Other | Level: Mastered | Cost: Action

Sing to me, cause I can't hear myself
through the loudness of my own hurts

base inspired by Odd <3