From being an Abandoned who had rarely left the Hollowed Grounds, to embracing the call of adventure, to dying and being reborn first as an Ascended and then as an Ancient, Maea has gone through quite the amount of changes in her life. One thing remains common, though, in her attempts to find out just where she belongs; she’s always had a craving for knowledge which has brought her to so many places and to meet so many people here in Caido. We can’t wait to see what else is in store for her!
Congratulations, Maea!
Credits
Court of the Fallen was created in October of 2018 by Odd, Honey, and Crooked.
Skinning and hosting by the epically talented Kaons, and functionality fanciness by the coding magic of Neowulf. If you ever see either of them around, make sure to show them some love!
08-22-2019, 09:36 PM (This post was last modified: 08-22-2019, 09:37 PM by Samuel.)
Sam's morning routine was usually:
- Wake up at dawn
- Make a cup of tea
- Pet Mia and read a book
After that, he could go to his shop, or out to do errands, or stay in and work on his projects. Since Nate had begun to live with him he had begun to say good morning to him every so often, but other than that he continued in the way he had for years.
This morning, however, he did not come down stairs. Not even when Mia, wondering where her breakfast was, came meowing up to the door and then to his bed, where he laid curled up, crying into his hands. Loud, incoherent sobs, so much distress in them that even a hungry cat stopped her wailing and instead just curled up at his feet.
Waking up to the sound of crying wasn't exactly something unfamiliar to Nate, but familiarity did not mean he liked it. For the first moment after he woke up, there was a quiet panic, Nate's mind trying to shrug off the haze of sleep and the previous night's drink. Once actual thought came back to him, Nate frowned, and got up, walking up the stairs to Sam's bedroom.
Mia had preceded him, and probably offered the same amount of comfort he could. If not more. Standing awkwardly in the doorway, Nate simply watched the other man for a moment, wondering what to do. What he could do. It wasn't long before he was stepping into the room proper, sitting on the edge of the bed and lifting a hand to rest on Sam's shoulder.
"Are you alright?" A stupid question, with an obvious answer, but what else was he supposed to say?
So let's face it this was never what you wanted
But I know it's fun to pretend
Now blank stares and empty threats
Are all I have, they're all I have
Sam was so wrapped up in his thoughts (not that they were very clear. They swirled about, dark and despairng, just a chorus of you did this over and over) he did not hear Nate enter, did not notice him stood watching. It was only when there was a touch on his shoulder he flinched and whipped up, scrambling backwards as if scared he was about to be struck.
For a moment he stared, breathing heavily in panic, before he realised who it was and slowly relaxed, though looked just as distressed. "...No. No, I'm not. I..." He bit his lip, wondering if he wanted to tell Nate about the dream. He didn't know how much the man knew about the Blight, all that had been going on...would he be sympathetic? Or would he call Sam a monster?
Deciding it was best to be vague at first, he finally said: "I think I might have done something awful, and there's nothing I can do to stop it now."
The last thing Nate was expecting when he touched Sam was the violent flinch, Nate himself flinching back in response, his hands coming up automatically, though he wasn't sure if that was to show he was unarmed and safe, or that he was surrendering.
After a tense moment, they both took a breath, Nate lowering his hands and crouching down beside Sam. He didn't reach out, not yet, when he wasn't sure how the touch would be taken. He hummed as Sam spoke, tipping his head from side to side.
"You might have done something awful?" Nate had to resist the urge to smile, just a little. It was cute, in a strange way, to see how distraught the other man got over what was pretty much a hypothetical. "If it's only might, then you didn't mean it, right? As long as you don't keep doing it now, then I think you're okay."
So let's face it this was never what you wanted
But I know it's fun to pretend
Now blank stares and empty threats
Are all I have, they're all I have
As he saw Nate jump up, hands raised, Sam shook his head and reached out a hand, feeling guilty for shocking him. Though right now, he didn't want to be touched; he couldn't be loved when he was such a monster.
"No, you don't understand. I have done something awful. I...T-the Voice just told me." Deperately wiping at his eyes, he tried to calm himself so he could actually tell Nate. Not that he wanted to say the words, sure that he was going to be considered the scum of the Earth, but...Nate deserved to know what he lived with.
Mia jumped into Sam's lap as he sat and he stroked her, stayed staring down at her as he spoke. "Do...you know people have been falling ill? With a disease called the Blight...well, it's awful, and one of my friends might actually die from it. No one knew how it had started, and a lot of people...a lot of p-people blamed Ascended..." His voice started to become tear logged again and Sam lowered his face into his hand and took a few breaths.
"I told them it wasn't. I didn't think we had. I thought...they were just thinking that because we're different. But...b-but the Voice...just told me..." He curled down, pressing his forehead to Mia; when he spoke again it was muffled. "It was me. Or...well, all of us."
Nate’s brows furrowed as Sam explained what exactly he had done, growing more upset and incoherent as he did. Without thinking, and despite everything he had just been told, Nate reached out to wrap an arm around the other man, wanting to comfort him, despite the confession.
Really, he had no idea what to think of any of this. He had seen the blight, it was a disease, something that could be controlled and tested and managed. Like any other sickness. Not some plague brought in by anyone. Especially not someone like Sam.
”So you think you started it, because of what the Voice told you?” He had enough sense to know he couldn’t just outright refute the other mans beliefs, he had to finesse his words. Redirect the blame, put things in a different perspective, justify them. One of his skills was alleviating blame and guilt with clever words. ”You can’t be sure she’s telling the truth, and even if she is, you didn’t do anything intentionally, right?”
Hugging Sam closer with his one arm, Nate wondered absently if he should be more cautious. Worry touched him only rarely, but... knowing what the blight didn’t to plants, and gown quickly, did spark some in him. But... ”Don’t you think I’d be sick, of you really did spread the blight?”
So let's face it this was never what you wanted
But I know it's fun to pretend
Now blank stares and empty threats
Are all I have, they're all I have
This time, as Nate came towards him, Sam easily leaned into the touch. His face leaned into Nate's shoulder and his tears soaked into his shirt, a hand clutching at the fabric over his chest. Even like this, though, he grumpily responded with: "No. I know I did it. The Voice doesn't lie." Which was true, technically. She had never said he wasn't spreading the Blight, she had just...neglected to mention it.
He didn't know why Nate wasn't sick, that was true. Sudden worry shooting through him he looked up to stare at his face, blinking back tears, scared he'd sudden see the Blight take over Nate's kind eyes. But nothing happened and he leaned back in. "I think...it has something to do with the Greatwood, too. It was spread from there first, because I went there. So maybe...because you haven't been there..."
"Everyone is going to hate me." Sam stated simply, staring out at the corner of the room.
Instead of pulling away again, Sam moved closer, clung to him like a buoy in a stormy sea. Nate was fairly certain that everything lied, but that wasn’t an opinion he could voice. At least not right now. He ran a hand up and down the smaller mans arm, trying to offer as much comfort as he knew how.
Sam shifted against him, Nate looking down to catch green eyes staring intently up at him, searching for something. He quirked a brow and smiled, a silent reassurance that he was fine, with this, with what Sam thought he’d done. ”That’s... not really how diseases work. You don’t... infect things selectively.” Sure, it was true that he hadn’t been to the Greatwood, but he’d been around the blight, extensively, and he’d suffered no ill effects. Not to mention all the time he’d spent with Sam.
Reaching down to caress Sams cheek, Nate sighed. ”I don’t hate you. And... it’s difficult to hold a mistake against someone. Especially with how sorry you are about it.”
So let's face it this was never what you wanted
But I know it's fun to pretend
Now blank stares and empty threats
Are all I have, they're all I have
09-03-2019, 08:46 PM (This post was last modified: 09-05-2019, 05:37 AM by Samuel.)
"It might be how this disease works though. The Voice...shes not...the same as everyone else." Sam quietly despaired, desperate to keep himself in the blame. Though this was likely true - The Blight did not seem to follow the same rules as any other illness. It had spread so quickly, to trees first, from unaffected Ascended...he had not heard of anything like it.
Still though, he felt comforted by the hand on his cheek and leaned into the touch. "I am...very sorry about it. I really am. But I don't know if that's going to matter for anyone else."
Miserable, he pressed his face into Nate's chest, breathing him in. Perhaps it was inappropriate, to take such clear comfort from the man when they were not officially involved, but it was comfort Sam sorely needed. Mia, disgruntled from being booted from her position on his lap, 'mrrp'-ed and squeezed her way between them, drawing a weak laugh from him.
Nate rubbed his face with his free hand, stifling a sigh. He didn’t know how to really deal with... everything Sam was doing at the moment. Things had never really affected him like this, and it wasn’t like he had a lot of experience with a nurturing touch.
That didn’t mean this couldn’t be a reason to start though.
”Look... you don’t need to be sorry. Maybe... maybe you did cause this. But you didn’t mean it. Clearly. I mean, look at you. I’ve never seen a man so sorry for anything, and... I’ve seen a lot of sorry people.” Nate tried to chuckle, hoping it would draw the same out of the other man.
It felt strange, and good, to be trying to comfort Sam. And the face against his chest made Nate feel like... maybe he was doing something right. Like he could actually build somethingdor himself, with Sam, and Mia worming her way in between them.
So let's face it this was never what you wanted
But I know it's fun to pretend
Now blank stares and empty threats
Are all I have, they're all I have
"...I guess. Thank you, Nate." Sam was not particularly convinced; it would take more than some nice words and one hug, even from Nate, to make him feel any better about this. But there was comfort to be found in his arms and he took in all of it he could. At least Nate had not left the house in disgust - it seemed that for the moment, despite his sins, he had someone in his corner.
Petting Mia's head and pressing his face into Nate's chest, he felt warm and his tears finally truly dried up. They would return, but now he at least knew he had somewhere safe to go.
