From being an Abandoned who had rarely left the Hollowed Grounds, to embracing the call of adventure, to dying and being reborn first as an Ascended and then as an Ancient, Maea has gone through quite the amount of changes in her life. One thing remains common, though, in her attempts to find out just where she belongs; she’s always had a craving for knowledge which has brought her to so many places and to meet so many people here in Caido. We can’t wait to see what else is in store for her!
Congratulations, Maea!
Credits
Court of the Fallen was created in October of 2018 by Odd, Honey, and Crooked.
Skinning and hosting by the epically talented Kaons, and functionality fanciness by the coding magic of Neowulf. If you ever see either of them around, make sure to show them some love!
I've been very hopeful so far
Now for the first time I think we're going wrong
Hurry up and tell me this is all a dream
Or could we start again, please?
Recovering from the blight in some ways struck Phoebe as far worse than coming down from it. She had lost herself in those days and weeks when the illness had been at its worst but she remembered it still as it began to fade away. It had been as though she had been trapped in her own head, watching as her body enacted all sorts of violence and spewed hatred on the world around her; unable to stop or reign in the force that twisted her mind and emotions to everything that she abhorred. And in its wake, she was left alone, having caused irreparable damage between her and those closest to her (at least irreparable by her own measurements).
Fortunately, as the blight began to settle and fade away, she had been released from the prison. Everything about her seemed dulled, her coloring, her hair, her eyes – her vibrancy had been dampened and stained by the blight. She had washed herself until her skin felt raw and red, unable to scrub away the taint she felt from the blood of her friends she had spilled on herself. And now she walked, aimlessly, lost in her own mind, barely registering the pink dragon at her side. She didn’t stop until her feet hit a set of stairs. She gazed up them, realizing she had found her way to the mezzanine stairs in the temple. It was rarely used and a nice, quiet refuge. Slowly she ascended them, shuffling her way over to a built in bench by a window. In silence, she sat, curling up her legs and wrapping her oversized scarf around her like a blanket, leaning on the wall to gaze out at the window at the destroyed Spire and snow covered settlement.
Loneliness creeped in like the window draft, chilling her to her bones. But she deserved it.
Though no one had officially told Loren anything he was pretty sure he was going to hear any day now that the Launceleyn Manor was not going to be a designated gathering space for LongNight. So, while he waited, he decided to evaluate the other options. The Monster Hunter’s Guild and the Artisan’s Guild were not places he was going to visit willingly, what with the presence of Ronin and Remi at both. And he definitely wasn't going to stay there when the darkness fell and the monsters came out to play. Instead, he’d decided to check out the Temple. Even though it had proved ineffective last year, people seemed to feel it was one of the best options.
And if the summoner was avoiding dealing with his personal problems by coming here, well, no one could really tell him that this wasn’t important. So he’d examined, and considered, and decided that everyone was an idiot if they thought this place was defensible. But given how empty he felt inside, and given that he was on thin ice, he wasn’t going to argue the point. Swimming upstream on this would be too difficult: if he went with the flow and did his best to fortify this place maybe he could keep casualties to a minimum.
If people wanted to be idiots and get themselves killed, he couldn’t stop them. All he could do was save those he could.
He walked up a flight of stairs and spotted a familiar figure. Phoebe looked like crap, and the Launceleyn immediately tensed. The healer was blighted, and based off his previous encounters with those with the blight, he knew what would happen if she saw him. And he had no interest in fighting her off, tired as he was. Softly, he tried to walk down the stairs without alerting Phoebe to his presence while simultaneously keeping his eyes trained or her and Pim. Of course, he wasn’t the most coordinated, and he was risking his next trying to walk down the stairs like this, but better that than getting attacked from behind.
I've been very hopeful so far
Now for the first time I think we're going wrong
Hurry up and tell me this is all a dream
Or could we start again, please?
In the silence of the mezzanine though, even his soft footsteps did not go undetected. Pim lifted his head from where he lay on the floor, eyeing the Launceleyn curiously. As the man began to descend the stairs the dragonling tilted his head before trilling after him, flapping his wings. Unlike most humans he met, he actually rather liked the quiet fellow. He had calmed Phoebe down once when she had needed it. That was a trustworthy fellow to him.
But of course, this alerted Phoebe to his presence, and she turned to look at him. She was truly a shadow of herself, the fire that Loren had seen exhibited before replaced by melancholy and remorse. ”Oh, hello Loren. You can come up. I won’t bother you.” she said, almost sadly. She had been cruel to him too. She couldn’t imagine he would want to be around her any more than anyone else.
Phoebe might’ve been a shadow of what she’d once been, but Loren was even less than that. So as Pim came winging the summoner’s way, all he did was give the small dragon a wary look. It was the same expression that the Launceleyn trained on the healer: despite how calm she was acting, he obviously didn’t trust it. Some of the other blighted had seemed placid at first, but they all erupted before too long. So he kept retreating, holding up his hands in a placating gesture. ”I don’t want to hurt you.” Still, when she inevitably attacked, Loren would defend himself.
I've been very hopeful so far
Now for the first time I think we're going wrong
Hurry up and tell me this is all a dream
Or could we start again, please?
Phoebe’s brows knitted together in confusion at first. Why was he backing away like that? Pim felt her confusion, and soon sent her mental pictures, little creatures cowering from him before he pounced. She paled with the realization that he was scared of her, and tainted black tears welled up in her eyes. ”I-I know you don’t I’m sorry I…I won’t hurt you I just…” she stuttered, her voice breaking with emotion as the tears began to roll, leaving black stains on her cheeks.
”I’m sorry I was cruel to you I…this blight has made me a monster.” she whispered quietly, looking down at her trembling hands. Pim looked between them before trilling at Loren again, as imploring as a dragonling could be. Pim could only do so much. He only barely understood humans. Loren had helped her once before, why not again?
Loren saw the tears in Phoebe’s eyes, and his heart ached at the sight. Still, he assumed that it was just ranting and raving from the blight, since he had no idea that the Roses had worked and the afflicted were on the mend. And her tears were black, further evidence that this was a trick, somehow designed to lure him into a false sense of complacency. Still, as she talked about being a monster, he found himself shaking his head. ”It’s not your fault, it’s the blight. Don’t worry, though. The cure will work. Just hold on until then, okay?” Even now, though, he crept carefully backward, even tenser now; every single other blighted hadn’t wanted to hear about the cure, and he figured Phoebe was no exception. Although he knew talking to them had no effect, he couldn’t stand here and do nothing. He just hoped he wouldn’t make the situation worse.
I've been very hopeful so far
Now for the first time I think we're going wrong
Hurry up and tell me this is all a dream
Or could we start again, please?
Phoebe sniffled and wiped at her eyes, a chocked sob escaping her lips as she saw the black stains that now covered her fingertips from her tears. ”But I’ve done so many horrible things, said so many horrible things…” she whispered, her breath coming in short little gasps for a moment. Her emotions were still volatile and unstable, but they tended to lean more towards sorrow now than the overt anger she had shown before.
She nodded a little at his mention of the cure, her fingers trembling. The flowers still made her uneasy. She gave them wide berth when she passed by. But speaking of them did not elicit the same angry response it once had. ”It has already begun to work. Slowly but…I am already better than I was.” she said softly. She turned and looked at him, eyes full of remorse and black tears. ”I’m so sorry for being so awful to you. You didn’t deserve than. No one deserves that.”
09-17-2019, 09:07 PM (This post was last modified: 09-17-2019, 09:07 PM by Loren.)
LOREN
”It wasn’t you. Not really.” Loren had said as much to every person with the blight—and pretty much everyone he’d spoken to—and Phoebe was no exception. Unfortunately, he had no Roses left to make her see reason, and there was no other way to get through to her that he knew of.
However, when she said the flowers had already begun to work, he halted. He didn’t dare believe her, because she was blighted and would say anything she thought might hurt him. But if there was even a ghost of a chance that she was telling the truth, then he needed to know. ”What do you mean, it has already begun to work?” He ignored the rest of her self-pitying words, knowing they were unimportant and that it was just the blight speaking.
I've been very hopeful so far
Now for the first time I think we're going wrong
Hurry up and tell me this is all a dream
Or could we start again, please?
”But it was me…my body any ways. Who could look at me the same after that?” she said squeezing her eyes closed. She wasn’t sure she could look at herself after everything that had transpired. She had tried to eat people! She had attacked them with teeth and nails and words. She had destroyed a wedding location…blight or no blight, how could all that be forgivable?
His question distracted her though, and she sniffled a bit. ”The flowers. They are already working. Me and some of the others…we are regaining our consciousness again.” she said softly, wiping at the black streaks on her cheeks. ”My anger has all turned into sadness too. I am not as strong as the blight made me. Its just…starting to go away.”
Well, at least Phoebe’s answer was one Loren knew the answer to. ”Roana could. Remi could. I could. No one blames you, or anyone else with the blight.” They were sick, in their minds and bodies, and no one would hold that against them. Of course, he was still half convinced the healer’s damsel in distress act was a trick.
However, the more she spoke, the less convinced he became. She was far more lucid, and each passing moment without an outburst was making him more and more inclined to believe her wild claim that the Roses had indeed done their job. Still, he wasn’t going to take her word at face value. ”Prove it.” It was probably an impossible task, but he needed to be certain.
I've been very hopeful so far
Now for the first time I think we're going wrong
Hurry up and tell me this is all a dream
Or could we start again, please?
"I tried to eat Remi, I actually took a bite out of his shoulder!" she said, her voice breaking with a sob, covering her face with her hands. Pim whined, pacing as the weight of her dismay washed over him. Drowning, always drowning, these humans in their emotions. But for a moment the midwife couldn't speak. She could only cry, her hands turning black from the tears she shed. She was a monster. Only Frey could forgive her and love her still, and only because he was a god that held close to the reality of one's nature.
But the Launceleyn asked her to prove she was getting better, that the flowers were doing their job. She looked up from her hands, face greyed from the tears spread across her cheeks. "How am I supposed to prove that?" she said, her breath coming in short gasps. "Look at you, backing away like a rabid animal already. Am I really that scary?"
Loren knew about the bite, actually, so Phoebe’s words hardly came as a surprise. Still, even though everything was incredibly complicated between the summoner and the alchemist, he couldn’t imagine the other man would blame the healer for her actions. Especially because Ronin also had the blight, Remi of all people should be capable of forgiving the afflicted. ”And has he blamed you for that?” The summoner's question came out as gently as he was able to manage these days, which was not very. Still, he knew self-pity when he saw it—having engaged in it often enough himself—and he bet she’d just come up here to mope without actually bothering to talk to anyone. Unless, of course, his suspicions about the blight still coursing through her were correct.
Even the obvious distress and grief on her face and in her voice was not enough to move the Launceleyn, either his feet or his emotions. ”I’m sorry. You’re not scary. But the blight is. So while I want to believe you, I can’t trust that it’s not the blight trying to fool me.” If she really was on the mend, hopefully she’d understand. But the gods had Abandoned the Launceleyn, and he couldn't believe that their miracle cure would work so quickly.
I've been very hopeful so far
Now for the first time I think we're going wrong
Hurry up and tell me this is all a dream
Or could we start again, please?
Phoebe shrugged at his question, desperately trying to get the black stains off her face and hands as she hyperventilated slightly. "He hasn't come back since leaving me at the jail. I think that probably answers that." she said, hiccupping lightly as she tried to sniffle. What else could it mean? He was glad to be rid of her monstrous self. Who would want to continue a friendship with someone who tried to eat you after all?
She shook her head slightly at his explanation. "It's not, but I can't exactly prove to you that it isn't. It's rage is focused on me now, not others." she said, starting to get a handle on her emotions, as weak as it was. "So I guess it makes sense you wouldn't want to be near me. Sorry." she whispered.
”Well I don’t think that answers that at all.” It was weird to have a conversation with Phoebe that was coherent, since Loren had been expecting nothing more than a raving lunatic. Still, if he could reassure her, even through the blight, he would feel better about leaving her. ”Ronin is sick too, Phoebe. And Remi...he’s been busy. And stressed. And I’ll bet he wants to spend as much time with his husband as he can. If you really are better, and you really do care about him, then go seek him out. Don’t wait for him to find you.” It was something that the Launceleyn hadn’t ever learned to do. Then again, he was still half-avoiding the alchemist.
At the healer’s words, the summoner fidgeted. Half of him wanted to flee, while the other half was desperate to trust her seemingly sane explanation that all their hard work had finally paid off. So he decided to split the difference: he wouldn’t approach her, but he’d remain here and observe and make his own judgments. ”What do you mean, the rage is focused on you but not others?” Every little bit of information helped, especially if this was simply another stage of the blight, as that comment led him to believe and not an actual cure. He wasn’t going to bother answering her martyred comment, because it was the blight’s fault not hers and he knew she was being ridiculous and would come to her senses soon enough.
