From being an Abandoned who had rarely left the Hollowed Grounds, to embracing the call of adventure, to dying and being reborn first as an Ascended and then as an Ancient, Maea has gone through quite the amount of changes in her life. One thing remains common, though, in her attempts to find out just where she belongs; she’s always had a craving for knowledge which has brought her to so many places and to meet so many people here in Caido. We can’t wait to see what else is in store for her!
Congratulations, Maea!
Credits
Court of the Fallen was created in October of 2018 by Odd, Honey, and Crooked.
Skinning and hosting by the epically talented Kaons, and functionality fanciness by the coding magic of Neowulf. If you ever see either of them around, make sure to show them some love!
Let you go and the lonely in
To take my heart again
Phoebe frankly wasn’t certain where she could find Lusea. She hadn’t seen the woman since the day she had tried to help her upon her arrival in Caido. But she knew the woman had worked at a bar in her homeland, so that was where Phoebe stalked. Or rather sat. Phoebe wasn’t exactly intimidating enough to stalk. She took up a spot at the bar proper, a double whiskey neat in her trembling fingers, and she waited, obvious, unassuming, hoping her hunch that the former barmaid might visit the Rathskellar would prove fruitful.
Perhaps it was odd to feel compelled to speak to the woman Jata was properly with after sleeping with him, but she couldn’t shake the need to speak with her. ”I don’t care what she thinks.” Jata’s words rung clear in her mind. It didn’t sit right with her. It didn’t fit the narrative he had told all along, and everything in their recent actions made her question his honesty; with her, and with Lusea.
People I would rather not see ever again in my life: Half of Korofi. Sunny's father. The little blonde midwife.
Two out of three isn't awful, I suppose. But oh, that third one stings. I almost turn around and walk out when I see her in the bar- almost, but not quite, because fuck if I'm going to let her take something else away from me. No, I've faced far more frightening people than Phoebe Steadman, people who have hurt me far worse.
Wrapped in a long coat, the scars hidden as ever, I take a seat on the opposite end of the bar, not making eye contact with the girl. I'm here for a reason, after all, and as the attractive bartender hands me a pint I sip it thoughtfully, trying to focus on myself and not the near stranger who sits ten feet away.
Let you go and the lonely in
To take my heart again
Sure enough, after some time passed, Lusea entered the bar. Phoebe watched as she almost seemed to make a point of sitting as far from her as possible, avoiding eye contact. She couldn't blame her, and she had no idea what Jata may or may not have told her. But the midwife waited until the other woman had a drink in hand before quietly sliding off her chair and moving around the bar. In silence she sat next to Lusea, eyes cast down at the whiskey she held in both hands.
"I am sure you don't want to see me, but I was hoping I could talk to you." she said softly. As it had been when Phoebe found her, her voice carried a whispery, soft quality, though now her tone was interlaced with melancholy rather than comforting warmth.
Well fuck. Seems like it really isn't my night, because no sooner do I take a sip of my beer does the midwife decide it's time to come get cozy. Exactly what I didn't want, but this place has a knack for disregarding my desires.
Grinding my teeth as she slides in beside me, I carefully school my features into a well practiced and pleasant mask, half turning to fix her with a steel eyes. "It's a free country, as far as I know," I reply with a shrug, though honestly I'm not even sure it's a country at all. But that's neither here nor there.
And I owe her one for saving me. Really, that's the only reason i don't tear her throat out right here. Raising my tankard to my lips, I take a long, refreshing pull. She can talk to me, but I don't have to listen.
Let you go and the lonely in
To take my heart again
Well, that was more than she had hoped for. "If you can call a monarchy free, I suppose." she said with a little shrug.
But now the hard part. Brown eyes stayed fixed on brown liquid. "I don't know what Jata told you, but I wanted you to hear from me...because I'm certain he would not have told you everything." she said softly, glancing up at Lusea, remorse in her gaze - not for Jata and whatever trouble he was in, but for her. "But first I want to apologize. I won't make excuses. I knew what I was doing and that it would hurt you. I just...I was angry at him. For you." she said, frowning a bit.
"When he made it clear what he wanted to do, I told him you would be angry and hurt. I figured that would be the end of it. But...he said he didn't care what you thought." she said, glaring down at her whiskey.
I don't know what Jata told you. Oh, okay, so we're doing this. Jumping right in. Great. I tighten my grip on the Stein, the only sign of the fury crackling under my skin as she begins to explain. An apology is more than I expected, though honestly, I did it for you? That's the story you're going with, Phoebe? "How very noble," I remark dryly, not really trying to hide the mockery in my voice. Should I be thanking her for taking one for the team?
Unlikely.
He said he didn't care. It stings, sears, leaves stars behind my eyes, but I already knew he was a fuckup. And lord knows I made it clear to him just how angry and hurt I am - he'll have a good deal of groveling to do. My lips draw into a line as she goes on, though, because honestly I'm confused. Is she trying to make me angrier? Is she hoping we'll bond over this?
Also unlikely.
Turning to face the girl full on, I put my elbow on the table and set my head upon my hand. "And you, Phoebe? Did you care what I thought? You said you were angry on my behalf, but it sounds like you did what you did for you."
Let you go and the lonely in
To take my heart again
”It wasn’t noble. It was selfish and poorly thought through.” she said with a slight shrug. She had been angry for Lusea in the moment, but the way she had dealt with it would ultimately hurt all involved – mostly Lusea and Jata. Hopefully the latter more than the former.
But finally Lusea turned to face her fully, and so Phoebe looked up from her glass, expression melancholic still. ”I did care what you thought. In fact I counted on it.” she said, a ghost of a smile on her lips. ”Before you arrived here, he spent every chance he got reminding me how wonderful and perfect you were…you were an unattainable goal I could never reach in. And yet, despite all that, he still didn’t care whether he hurt you or not.” Her eyes narrowed as she clenched her glass, knuckles going white. ”I…looked up to you in a way. And for him to just…” her lips pressed together and she huffed through her nose, feeling the anger rising in her again. ”I wanted you to be angry. I wanted you to know he didn’t care about you. And I wanted you to make him suffer for it because you’re the only person that could. So yes. I did it for me in that respect.” she said, looking over at Lusea, eyes alight with fire – though it could never contend with the other woman’s nature.
”You died for him – because of him. You deserve better than someone who doesn’t care what you think or feel after sacrificing that much for him.”
