you learn to live without
Samuel Wordsworth
Book maker/seller

Age: 34 | Height: 5' 5" | Race: Ascended | Nationality: Natural | Citizenship: Hollowed Grounds
Level: 10 - Strg: 28 - Dext: 25 - Endr: 27 - Luck: 25 - Int: 1
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#1
You learn to stand alone at last
So brave, and bold, and strong, and stout
When he'd finally come home after his many days non-stop working in the Atheneum, Sam had found that despite his Ascended lack of physical tiredness, he wanted nothing more than to go to bed. Even as depressing as it was, with the flat, cold duvet laying over where Nate had once been a frequent visitor - where once, his diaries told him, Remi had laid by his side too.

At least if he was on his own he could sleep as long as he wanted without judgement and lay however he wanted to. Curling up on the edge of the bed, dragging the duvet tight around him, he stared out of the window until his eyes began to close, the odd faint sleep of those that no longer needed it catching him.

As his eyes opened again, he wasn't in his room. He was somewhere entirely different, somewhere that both gave him a shot of fear and filled him with a sort of sickly longing. He was stood looking out to sea, feet just within the surf, on the Ahi Coast. Where Remi and he had spoken; in fact if he looked to the side he could see the mark in the sand where he had fallen, somehow not taken away by the surf.

Surely Remi would spot him soon, though he found himself unable to mind too much, priorities oddly bent around as he looked at his arms, wondering why the evening sun, sinking slowly into an orange sky, did not burn.
You learn somehow to like the dark, even love the doubt
SAMUEL
Base Code by Sky!
Remi Taliesin
the Bastion


Age: 31 | Height: 5'11 | Race: Demi-god | Nationality: Outlander | Citizenship: Torchline
Level: 15 - Strg: 68 - Dext: 60 - Endr: 100 - Luck: 93 - Int: 3
ORIA - Mythical - Spriggan (Ghost)
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MP: 3059
#2
i found cynicism, i found criticism
i've been zero to hero & i have been the villain
"How dare you come back here."

Whether Remi appeared or was simply stalking towards the ascended was impossible to say. In dreams that was always the way after all. His eyes burned with a light all their own; pools of blackness in a sea of green, darkening with every predatory step. Barefoot but wearing a shirt for once, Remi had likely been on his way to the bar for a drink to top the night off—or was that where he'd just come from?

"I swear to all the gods if you say something about lending an ear Sam I will tear them right from your head."
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
Samuel Wordsworth
Book maker/seller

Age: 34 | Height: 5' 5" | Race: Ascended | Nationality: Natural | Citizenship: Hollowed Grounds
Level: 10 - Strg: 28 - Dext: 25 - Endr: 27 - Luck: 25 - Int: 1
MIA - Regular - Ragdoll Cat
Played by: lancydulac Offline
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Posts: 3,135 | Total: 8,707
MP: 0
#3
You learn to stand alone at last
So brave, and bold, and strong, and stout
Remi's voice was expected yet still made him jump, probably because he still wasn't used to the venom it now held, the way it sounded like someone threatening rather than a comfort. He had once imagined Remi's voice whispering to him in moments of distress, now he wished for someone else to take him away from it.

Still, he found himself confident enough to turn and look him in the eyes. Sam didn't notice it, as was the way of dreams, but he was still dressed in his full usual outfit, waistcoat and all, only missing his shoes. "I'm not interested in lending you any more ears. You've made it rather clear where you stand - I'm here for my own reasons. You do not own this beach." He stood firm, still, not letting Remi's steps towards him provoke any visible movement back.
You learn somehow to like the dark, even love the doubt
SAMUEL
Base Code by Sky!
Remi Taliesin
the Bastion


Age: 31 | Height: 5'11 | Race: Demi-god | Nationality: Outlander | Citizenship: Torchline
Level: 15 - Strg: 68 - Dext: 60 - Endr: 100 - Luck: 93 - Int: 3
ORIA - Mythical - Spriggan (Ghost)
Played by: Odd Offline
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Posts: 10,723 | Total: 16,193
MP: 3059
#4
i found cynicism, i found criticism
i've been zero to hero & i have been the villain
A foot or two away, Remi stopped. He barked a laugh in Sam's face at that. "No of course you aren't. This isn't a game Sam, but if it were, you'd be losing horribly. How quickly you disregard those you call your friends. The ones you love. Again I don't grieve as you'd have me do, and oh look, again you're so quick to walk away."

Taking a step forward, the alchemist's eyes narrowed further. There weren't feathers in his curls now, no adorable indications of bemusement or unease, but leonine tufts of hair. "Did you even look for me, Sam? After what happened? Or did you go about your life? Place a notice? Ask a god? Did you do anything more than go home and fuck the doctor?"
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
Samuel Wordsworth
Book maker/seller

Age: 34 | Height: 5' 5" | Race: Ascended | Nationality: Natural | Citizenship: Hollowed Grounds
Level: 10 - Strg: 28 - Dext: 25 - Endr: 27 - Luck: 25 - Int: 1
MIA - Regular - Ragdoll Cat
Played by: lancydulac Offline
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Posts: 3,135 | Total: 8,707
MP: 0
#5
You learn to stand alone at last
So brave, and bold, and strong, and stout
Sam continued to stay statue still as Remi spoke, the only indication he'd heard a slight setting of his jaw as his teeth snapped together, frustration tensing up his whole body. It was only when Remi stepped forward that he seemed to snap out of his stupor, speaking back with a furore that he'd only found within himself in the last year.

"So I come to try and help you, you try to kill me. I come and try to ignore you, you insult me for that. You want me to have gone looking for you, yet when I did just that you immediately began to yell at me." He threw his hands out in frustration, finding this anger and the words that went with it very easy indeed to toss out, as if it had been waiting in him the whole time.

"Have you ever thought, Remi, that you are exhausting to know? Your constant changes of mood, your ongoing need to be the hero then deny you ever wanted to be-- How I wish I didn't care." He sighed heavily, looked over the beach with his lips pressed tight together, speaking the next words quietly and almost to himself, laden with emotion: "I lost the memories but The Voice didn't take the love. I wish she had."
You learn somehow to like the dark, even love the doubt
SAMUEL
Base Code by Sky!
Remi Taliesin
the Bastion


Age: 31 | Height: 5'11 | Race: Demi-god | Nationality: Outlander | Citizenship: Torchline
Level: 15 - Strg: 68 - Dext: 60 - Endr: 100 - Luck: 93 - Int: 3
ORIA - Mythical - Spriggan (Ghost)
Played by: Odd Offline
Change author:
Posts: 10,723 | Total: 16,193
MP: 3059
#6
i found cynicism, i found criticism
i've been zero to hero & i have been the villain
The alchemist seemed satisfied in a way that only predators are, to see Sam move back as he inched forward. He never considered himself an intimidating force before, but now? Now that was something so utterly gratifying about seeing the way the ascended recoiled. Vaguely, Remi wondered just how far he could push him.

"Oh is that so. Did you come and try to help me, or did you stumble blindly through a portal and just luckily happen upon me? And I did yes. After you screamed the name of my dead child over and over and over again." He took another step forward, hoping for it to have the same effect. "Ah yes. My constant changes of mood. This coming from the man who goes from being offended at a kiss in public to proclamations of love after just weeks of dating. Who then opts out of the relationship by forgetting me altogether. Who goes from whatever the hell this act is supposed to be, to a puddle of tears anytime Jigano says something you don't like to hear. And who do you always run to when you need the pieces picked back up? Call me exhausting or a hero, but don't lie and say you've not benefited infinitely from both."

Halting at the mention of wishing to forget he'd been loved, Remi blinked softly at that for a moment, his defences lowered. For a flicker of a moment there was sadness there; quickly however it snarled away by a cruel grin. "Well. Count yourself lucky you have it. Judging by Nate's actions, it's the only love you have left."
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
Samuel Wordsworth
Book maker/seller

Age: 34 | Height: 5' 5" | Race: Ascended | Nationality: Natural | Citizenship: Hollowed Grounds
Level: 10 - Strg: 28 - Dext: 25 - Endr: 27 - Luck: 25 - Int: 1
MIA - Regular - Ragdoll Cat
Played by: lancydulac Offline
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Posts: 3,135 | Total: 8,707
MP: 0
#7
You learn to stand alone at last
So brave, and bold, and strong, and stout
Sam flinched as Remi mentioned his yelling of 'Aoife'; it was indeed something he'd almost immediately come to regret. One of those things that had seemed a fantastic idea in the moment then had been obviously terrible seconds after, something he'd been tormenting himself with in the dead of night over and over again.

"If it was all such a pain for you, you could have said at some point sooner than this." He said quietly, softly, looking over Remi's shoulder. It was hard to keep up his frustration when it was Remi he was arguing with. After the initial burst of things he'd had to say, all that was left was the love and the pain, the knowledge that the thing they could have once had was broken irreparably and likely now always would be.

Sam caught the slight lowering of Remi's mask, the moment of a different man, the one he had known - and felt the punch of loss in his chest when he disappeared again. He did not question how Remi knew of Nate and his situation, just closed his eyes tight and furrowed his brows as it was mentioned so cruelly, so callously. The man he had fallen in love with once would have held him, comforted him. "That's not true. It's not true and you aren't allow to decide everything about me like that. Only...only I can do that."
You learn somehow to like the dark, even love the doubt
SAMUEL
Base Code by Sky!
Remi Taliesin
the Bastion


Age: 31 | Height: 5'11 | Race: Demi-god | Nationality: Outlander | Citizenship: Torchline
Level: 15 - Strg: 68 - Dext: 60 - Endr: 100 - Luck: 93 - Int: 3
ORIA - Mythical - Spriggan (Ghost)
Played by: Odd Offline
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Posts: 10,723 | Total: 16,193
MP: 3059
#8
i found cynicism, i found criticism
i've been zero to hero & i have been the villain
"Oh no Sam. How could I? Didn't you just yell at me the other day about how good and kind and whatever else I am? When I change either you don't like it, or it's exhausting because it doesn't read like a story from one of your stupid books."

How did he know that indeed. Luckily in dreams much can be known, especially when those details are held brightly in the mind of the dreamer.

'Isn't it Sam?" Remi took another hostile step forward, his voice just above a growl. Not too far back now was the exterior of the bar, and it made the alchemist's mouth water to think of Sam bumping up against it and realizing that he was trapped. "Why can't I. When you get to decide so much about me?"
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
Samuel Wordsworth
Book maker/seller

Age: 34 | Height: 5' 5" | Race: Ascended | Nationality: Natural | Citizenship: Hollowed Grounds
Level: 10 - Strg: 28 - Dext: 25 - Endr: 27 - Luck: 25 - Int: 1
MIA - Regular - Ragdoll Cat
Played by: lancydulac Offline
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Posts: 3,135 | Total: 8,707
MP: 0
#9
You learn to stand alone at last
So brave, and bold, and strong, and stout
"I don't know who you are anymore." Sam admitted, nearly a whisper, as more words tumbled from Remi's mouth. It was strange, to be so disgusted, so terrified, yet still so in love; still seeing the pain Remi was in and wanting to take it away, stroke his hair and kiss his temples. Yet every time he tried he failed, the secret way to Remi's heart clearly lost to him, a puzzle he'd been unable to solve in time.

He did indeed step back to the bar, hitting the small of his back against an extruding piece of wood and looking back, going to press against the flat surface instead. He was just as aware as Remi he was trapped here, but...at least if the man tried to attack him again, he had the barrier. He had the protection of his Goddess.

"There's one thing I do know a-about you." Sam dug his nails into his palm as his stutter threatened to bite at his voice again. "You loved me back, Remi. Once."
You learn somehow to like the dark, even love the doubt
SAMUEL
Base Code by Sky!
Remi Taliesin
the Bastion


Age: 31 | Height: 5'11 | Race: Demi-god | Nationality: Outlander | Citizenship: Torchline
Level: 15 - Strg: 68 - Dext: 60 - Endr: 100 - Luck: 93 - Int: 3
ORIA - Mythical - Spriggan (Ghost)
Played by: Odd Offline
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Posts: 10,723 | Total: 16,193
MP: 3059
#10
i found cynicism, i found criticism
i've been zero to hero & i have been the villain
"Nor do I. But I've lost my daughter Sam." If the bookmaker had thought Remi had fallen apart losing his friend—back when Ronin had only been that—he truly had no idea what it was the alchemist was dealing with now. This descent into madness. Only those who have been so thoroughly emptied of everything can understand what it's like to hate those who try to save you. To want nothing more than to linger in your own demise.

Sam didn't need to breathe, but still Remi fancied he could hear a startled puff of air as the ascended's back touch the wood. Something inside of his cut swirled and stirred; a hot red mixture brought to a simmer.

"Oh?" Remi tilted his head to the side, the scar tissue on his throat distorted by the tenseness of his neck and shoulders. Smirking darkly at this, Remi leaned forward to reveal teeth slightly sharpened. "But you threw that away. And now? Now I feel nothing at all. About anything."

Hollow, is what Remi was now. He was a once lush and vibrant forest burned to cinder and smoke by a fire; only ghostly black trunks remained. If touched they would fall apart—being only charcoal and grief—just as he would.
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
Samuel Wordsworth
Book maker/seller

Age: 34 | Height: 5' 5" | Race: Ascended | Nationality: Natural | Citizenship: Hollowed Grounds
Level: 10 - Strg: 28 - Dext: 25 - Endr: 27 - Luck: 25 - Int: 1
MIA - Regular - Ragdoll Cat
Played by: lancydulac Offline
Change author:
Posts: 3,135 | Total: 8,707
MP: 0
#11
You learn to stand alone at last
So brave, and bold, and strong, and stout
"...I know. I know. I...I tried to--" Sam didn't finish his sentence, knowing that Remi likely would not appreciate the thought of his daughter dragged up by The Voice, given new life by electricity injected into her bones. So desperately he wanted to help, so wanted to hope that it could be fixed somehow; he had never before wanted to retreat to the past, but now more than ever he wanted to be back before he'd made that awful decision, to be there with his new strength and confidence. To love Remi and continue loving him, so he'd never end up on this beach ruined and hollow.

Though knowing their luck, there would probably have been just as much sorrow in their own timeline.

Pressing himself against the wooden back of the bar, Sam looked away so he didn't have to see the smile on Remi's face, one that felt so alien and terrifying. "You need to t-tell yourself that. Because you feel too much. You're lying to yourself."
You learn somehow to like the dark, even love the doubt
SAMUEL
Base Code by Sky!
Remi Taliesin
the Bastion


Age: 31 | Height: 5'11 | Race: Demi-god | Nationality: Outlander | Citizenship: Torchline
Level: 15 - Strg: 68 - Dext: 60 - Endr: 100 - Luck: 93 - Int: 3
ORIA - Mythical - Spriggan (Ghost)
Played by: Odd Offline
Change author:
Posts: 10,723 | Total: 16,193
MP: 3059
#12
i found cynicism, i found criticism
i've been zero to hero & i have been the villain
Remi snarled vaguely at that. Sam wasn't the first one today to have told him that he cared too much, that all of this was just a facade to hide his wounded soul. "Of course. You think you still know me so well."

His voice was like sandpaper now; rough and full of grit. "I would have killed you the other day and thought nothing of it. You'd not have haunted my dreams." Someone else already did that. "So you're wrong Sam. It isn't something I just tell myself. I look inside and there's nothing there anymore and there won't be ever again. So think on that before you go screaming her name. Ronin won't always be there to save you."
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
Samuel Wordsworth
Book maker/seller

Age: 34 | Height: 5' 5" | Race: Ascended | Nationality: Natural | Citizenship: Hollowed Grounds
Level: 10 - Strg: 28 - Dext: 25 - Endr: 27 - Luck: 25 - Int: 1
MIA - Regular - Ragdoll Cat
Played by: lancydulac Offline
Change author:
Posts: 3,135 | Total: 8,707
MP: 0
#13
You learn to stand alone at last
So brave, and bold, and strong, and stout
"I...I still think you're wrong." Sam mumbled, his voice growing less confident by the second as he began to realise he shouldn't be there, guilt and fear rushing into his mind like the tide had suddenly come in. "But...um but...I did...make a mistake. By calling Aoifes name, and um, I'm...sorry..." He closed his eyes shut, knowing that 'sorry' was hardly going to cut it, but not having any other words.

For a moment he kept his eyes closed tight, wishing that when he opened them he'd see the Remi he used to know, a sweet man with gentle hands and an open heart, a desire to make things right; that he could feel the comfort of his friend and once-lover again. "No one is t-trying to be cruel to you, Remi. We all just want the best. For you. We just don't know how to...help with it."

With that said Sam would try to dart to the side, to make it so Remi was no longer backing him up against the bar, trying to dash up into the beach.
You learn somehow to like the dark, even love the doubt
SAMUEL
Base Code by Sky!
Remi Taliesin
the Bastion


Age: 31 | Height: 5'11 | Race: Demi-god | Nationality: Outlander | Citizenship: Torchline
Level: 15 - Strg: 68 - Dext: 60 - Endr: 100 - Luck: 93 - Int: 3
ORIA - Mythical - Spriggan (Ghost)
Played by: Odd Offline
Change author:
Posts: 10,723 | Total: 16,193
MP: 3059
#14
i found cynicism, i found criticism
i've been zero to hero & i have been the villain
Indeed it didn't cut it. Remi snarled in the dying light looking for all the world like he might reach out to bite Sam at any moment like some rabid dog.

Tilting his head back to bark a cruel laugh at the words, it was this darkened distraction that let Sam slip out beside him. Reaching forward Remi would try and grab at the man's collar or shoulder to try and pin him back against the wall. "Have any of you ever considered that I don't want your help? That maybe you all aren't worth coming back to?" Something began to burn bright and hot inside of the alchemist then, a primal and predatory reaction to his prey Sam trying to escape from him. He could hardly help the way his hands wanted to turn into claws and bury themselves deep in Sam's freckled flesh.
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.


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