MAEA
If only she knew what went on inside his head. If she had been attuned, perhaps that wordless bond might have helped her understand, let her close him against her heart the way only her body could convey in this moment. Show him how much she cared, how much she wanted to understand and support and be there, even in the midst of her own grief. Because of it. But his silence left her clueless, and with only his arms around her and his shuddering breaths against her skin to tell her that he was there at all, Maea was left to guess. Left to her own maelstrom of thoughts, where emotions came and went unchecked and the only real thing she could do was hold him, keep the water around them warm and wait.
If she had known what kind of darkness he was staring into, it would have terrified her. She, who never feared the deep shadows before.
"You did everything you could," she responded softly with tear-choked voice, lips still pressed to his hair when his voice came back. Showed her his regrets, a glimpse of what he struggled with; and she refused to balk at it, or let him linger there for too long. "What could you have done differently, with the information you had? What would any of you have done differently? They all chose to come with you, love. They followed you because they believed in the task Safrin set you, and because they wished to help.
"They knew it would be dangerous and they followed you anyway. Because they believed that you deserved it. Their love and loyalty. And you do. You do deserve it. All of it. Even this pain, because... because it means you are alive, and learning, and some day you will be in that place again and not make the same decisions you did now."
She wasn't sure her words made sense, if they would help or hinder or just make him reject her. But they felt true. A little high-and-mighty, plenty pointless and empty because they wouldn't change anything, not really. Their friends were still gone and they would be placing a dead little dragon on an altar to restore a shrine someone else had destroyed in their own grief caused by another failure brought on by a natural disaster no one could have predicted. It was all... just a slippery slope, and it was so easy to look back now and say what should have been done differently, but had Sunjata not done all that was in his power in those moments?
And if that was not enough - it wasn't, it really wasn't - then... that really only meant there was still more for him to learn. And for her too.
Because next time, she would not let him go alone.
And none of this made her heart break any less.
If she had known what kind of darkness he was staring into, it would have terrified her. She, who never feared the deep shadows before.
"You did everything you could," she responded softly with tear-choked voice, lips still pressed to his hair when his voice came back. Showed her his regrets, a glimpse of what he struggled with; and she refused to balk at it, or let him linger there for too long. "What could you have done differently, with the information you had? What would any of you have done differently? They all chose to come with you, love. They followed you because they believed in the task Safrin set you, and because they wished to help.
"They knew it would be dangerous and they followed you anyway. Because they believed that you deserved it. Their love and loyalty. And you do. You do deserve it. All of it. Even this pain, because... because it means you are alive, and learning, and some day you will be in that place again and not make the same decisions you did now."
She wasn't sure her words made sense, if they would help or hinder or just make him reject her. But they felt true. A little high-and-mighty, plenty pointless and empty because they wouldn't change anything, not really. Their friends were still gone and they would be placing a dead little dragon on an altar to restore a shrine someone else had destroyed in their own grief caused by another failure brought on by a natural disaster no one could have predicted. It was all... just a slippery slope, and it was so easy to look back now and say what should have been done differently, but had Sunjata not done all that was in his power in those moments?
And if that was not enough - it wasn't, it really wasn't - then... that really only meant there was still more for him to learn. And for her too.
Because next time, she would not let him go alone.
And none of this made her heart break any less.
I'm bleeding out for you
BASE INSPIRED BY ODD <3
