From being an Abandoned who had rarely left the Hollowed Grounds, to embracing the call of adventure, to dying and being reborn first as an Ascended and then as an Ancient, Maea has gone through quite the amount of changes in her life. One thing remains common, though, in her attempts to find out just where she belongs; she’s always had a craving for knowledge which has brought her to so many places and to meet so many people here in Caido. We can’t wait to see what else is in store for her!
Congratulations, Maea!
Credits
Court of the Fallen was created in October of 2018 by Odd, Honey, and Crooked.
Skinning and hosting by the epically talented Kaons, and functionality fanciness by the coding magic of Neowulf. If you ever see either of them around, make sure to show them some love!
04-17-2020, 09:12 PM (This post was last modified: 04-17-2020, 09:41 PM by Remi.)
REMI
the alchemist
there's a feeling i get when i look to the west, & my spirit is crying for leaving.
Remi sat on the front steps of the cottage, alone. Ronin was inside putting Seren to bed. It hopefully wouldn't take him long, the Festival of Lights having hopefully tuckered out the young girl. After all that the Alchemist had experienced in the proceeding hours made time feel like an illusion; he watched it trickle by him without context as the stars winked overhead.
Unable to sit still for every time he did his body began to disappear into shadow, Remi let his leg bounce out some unsteady rhythm as he clasped his hands between his knees. Isla's blood was still black beneath his nails, the Alchemist having made no attempt to remove it. His hands had been in his pockets for most of the Festival that his appearance might not draw undue questions. Or at least, questions from anyone who was not Ronin.
in my thoughts I have seen rings of smoke through the trees & the voices of those who stand looking.
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
It didn't take long to get his daughter off to sleep, and Ronin was particularly grateful tonight. Something was wrong with Remi, and he would get to the bottom of it now that they were finally alone. Stepping out into the cool night air, Ronin felt like it might be too still out there, like something was staring down at them and waiting. But his huband was there, on the steps, and really that was all that ever mattered.
Ronin sidled up behind Remi, perching on the step above to sit behind him, arms sneaking around the other man so he could draw him back against his chest. "Hey," he said softly, leaning in to kiss his cheek. "It's just us now. Whatever it is, I've got you. We'll deal with it. Tell me what's going on."
there's a feeling i get when i look to the west, & my spirit is crying for leaving.
Immediately the touch made the Alchemist hum a low note of happiness, his hands rising to grasp Ronin's wrists as if he planned on them talking hunched over and close the entire time. Remi had gotten used to identifying and pausing in the moments before one of them shared some secret or another—gods knew they'd had more than enough of them—and so rather than saying something immediately, he took notice of Ronin's heartbeat against his finger, his husband's breath near his ear, and the fading whisper of his kiss against his cheek.
"The blood is Isla's." Remi began softly, not bothering to twist to look at Ronin. Instead, he simply leaned back against the familiar shape of his husband and continued. "I realized...I'd trapped her in that form. It hadn't been her this whole time and I just...ignored it, like everything else." Swallowing hard, Remi smiled sadly into the darkness. "So I freed her of it, thinking Delphia or Jigano might come to collect her soul, but it was Ludo who did."
in my thoughts I have seen rings of smoke through the trees & the voices of those who stand looking.
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
Ronin could wait all night if he had to, the Star comfortable in their closeness and their warmth, even with the scent of copper that still lingered around his husband. With his cheek pressed against Remi's curls and his eyes on the dark night and the crashing waves beyond, it was little trouble to talk like this. Not that it made the subject of conversation any easier, and Remi would feel Ronin's heartbeat stutter ever so slightly against his finger.
"I'm sorry," he said, his voice barely needing to be more than a whisper. Somewhere overhead, Sugar had swooped down to land on the cottage roof, and even the thought of losing her was painful. He had no idea what his husband might be going through. Well... perhaps some, from when Ronin had killed Roana. But that wasn't a pleasant thought either.
"Ludo came?" He was done sounding uncomfortable about it. The deity was part of his husband now - though how much he was yet to find out. "Did... is Isla really free now, at least?"
there's a feeling i get when i look to the west, & my spirit is crying for leaving.
"I believe she is. Ludo said she was grateful to be set free, and it certainly seemed as though her soul rose up to Mort." Remi shrugged slightly beneath the weight of Ronin's arms. "All I know is that she's no more dead now than she was the night I found her and demanded her to be brought back. " Swallowed hard, Remi imagined what it would be like to have stuffed Aoife into the body of a bird or a butterfly. How horrific that would be to all that she was.
How truly stupid he'd been.
"Ludo.." Remi fit his hand beneath Ronin's, curling his fingers through his husband's from beneath. "..owns my soul now. That night I promised it anything of me, and such was its payment. It didn't take it and said it wasn't planning on killing me—" The yet was palpable and didn't need saying. "But it said how poisoned it had become. Said it needing cleansing." That too made the Alchemist smile sadly into the night. Where once his fingers might have turned into feathers to brush against Ronin's, now there were only his hands there.
"It took..." Suddenly, it felt harder to say. It wasn't shock wearing off, the realization of it all not suddenly occurring to him, and yet saying it out loud was...strange. Softly surreal. "Nearly everything. No more creation..no more lion..no earth, no water...no strange way of seeing, no..." Were he able to communicate with Ronin silently anymore, he would have. "...no attuned abilities, saving for the shifts it left me with. Hawk, and manticore." The Alchemist's melancholy tone was subdued as he finally tilted his head to peer up at Ronin that he might gauge the hunter's reaction to all of this.
in my thoughts I have seen rings of smoke through the trees & the voices of those who stand looking.
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
Ronin let out a sigh into the night. At least there was that, in all of this. At least Isla could finally go and be at peace. His fingers curled around Remi’s, the hunter feeling his eyes grow heavy with the exhaustion of the day. Because that was it, right? Remi had killed his friend and companion; of course he had been shaken when he had returned to the festival.
But then the Alchemist continued to speak, and Ronin felt the bottom fall out of his stomach. Ludo owns my soul now. The Star squeezed his husband’s hand, his fingers feeling suddenly freezing cold, and starlight fractured out of him in panicked bursts. He felt it then, as Remi continued to explain - he felt the silence of him, understanding at last what was missing. It hadn’t been for long, but already Ronin has grown accustomed to hearing the Alchemist, to feeling his emotions thrum through their bond. And now he felt very, very alone.
But you are perfect, he wanted to say. Your soul was perfect, just the way it was. Ultimately, though, it wasn’t something either of them had a say in. A god made a choice, and they had to live with it. Ronin lived that reality; and now, so did Remi.
Letting out a shuddering breath, Ronin gathered the Alchemist all the closer against him. ”Are you okay? Are you hurt?” he asked, his voice tight with worry. ”I... fuck, Remi. Fuck.” Kissing his cheek again, it was all the hunter could do to simply hold onto his husband, waiting for his mind and body to catch up with events. That he hadn’t lost Remi. That he wasn’t going anywhere.
there's a feeling i get when i look to the west, & my spirit is crying for leaving.
There was a lot to read into, unsaid things hidden between the lines and veiled in gestures decipherable only to those who have shared everything. Remi wasn't even sure he could lie to Ronin anymore. Couldn't imagine wanting to. Listening through the stillness, the Alchemist smiled despite himself. Had the pair really been through so much, that the hunter could take this so easily in stride? Gods the pair they had become, and yet it filled Remi with a brazen sort of delight to know that despite it all, here they were still with their heads above water.
'I am. I'm not." Remi answered in turn. " I still love you infinitely. We're still alright."
It wasn't really possible for someone to actively try and seem like themselves, and yet the Alchemist seemed to try it. His smile was boyish and crooked, his expression that nearly-nauseating combination of adoration and admiration. Cheeks dimpled, eyes light and lit from within, Remi relaxed beneath Ronin's knees.
"The process was...not pleasant as I'm sure you can imagine. Washing a soul requires encountering all the things that tainted it."
Running his fingers along the edges of Ronin's, feeling where the calloused underside met the smooth skin above, Remi shook his head apologetically. "The promise was made before you, strange as that sounds.." That there had been a time before Ronin seemed ludicrous now. "I'd not make such a deal now. Not for all the world." Glancing up, he gave the hunter a half-smile, knowing that his apologetic tone meant little in the wake of the thing asked of him.
in my thoughts I have seen rings of smoke through the trees & the voices of those who stand looking.
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
"Good," Ronin said, and he meant it. Whatever else had happened, whatever his thoughts were trying to make of Remi's soul belonging to Ludo, of his husband's magic and Attuned power vanishing, of any amount of panic and chaos that roiled within, to hear that Remi was alright was everything. The warmth between them was building to something steady and comforting, and Ronin pressed his cheek against the Alchemist's curls, closing his eyes for a second.
"No, I imagine it wasn't pleasant," he murmured, his heartbeat slowly returning to something like normal. And as Remi shifted to glance at him, all apologies and explanations, Ronin could only scoff and give his husband a reassuring squeeze. "You think I care?" he said warmly. "Of course you'd make different decisions now. So would I. Whatever has happened, I promise I am fine as long as you're okay. That's all I need to know. Anything else I can work with."
Letting out a long, deep sigh, Ronin leant back a bit against the step behind him. "Do you want to talk about it? I'm all ears, however long you need."
there's a feeling i get when i look to the west, & my spirit is crying for leaving.
Breathing in the smell of the sea and the woodsy-scent of his husband (despite being no where near the woods anymore), Remi relaxed his hold so Ronin could lean back.
"I think I'm still processing it all, really. I...should feel as though I've lost so much. The shifts, the magic...but strangely I don't." He hummed thoughtfully at that, marveling at his own revelation. "I knew those things were never me, but...well, maybe I didn't know it. Not all the way down. For so long its been Remi come and make this with your magic, or Remi use your shifts for this. I mean..." Running a hand through his curls, he laughed almost bitterly. "Gods, I'm sitting here saying what I've lost, and it's still more than I ever had." The humour turned wry before it faded away, Remi shooting a self-deprecating look up towards Ronin.
"Sam found me on the beach, before I came back to the festival." Shaking his head with an expression of because of course he did, the Alchemist shrugged. "And I didn't want to kill him. Whatever Ludo did, this soul-cleansing, it...I didn't realize how much I was carrying around." So saying, he looked up towards Ronin in earnest now, as if something about that meant he owed his husband an apology.
in my thoughts I have seen rings of smoke through the trees & the voices of those who stand looking.
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
"Maybe you didn't need them after all," Ronin reasoned softly, reaching up to tease his fingers affectionately through Remi's curls, smiling as he listened to him speak. "Or maybe it's just a relief. People can't ask you for something you haven't got." He chuckled. For all their suggestions, though, he imagined it ran much deeper than that. Something like Remi going back to his roots and getting to be something more simple, more real. "Hey," he said, nudging his husband as he noted the bitterness in his tone. "You can still talk about it. I literally came back to life and I still complain about being alive," he pointed out.
Raising his eyebrows at hearing about the encounter with Sam, Ronin adjusted himself to sit up once more, gazing out into the darkness and the muted light from the nearby Aumakua. "We all have our weights to carry, Remi," he told him, glancing down to meet his eyes. "There's no shame in it. I'm glad that you're feeling lighter, though. I... it would be a lie if I didn't say these past couple of seasons haven't been rough. Do you... I mean, did Ludo say what it wanted of you? What owning your soul means?"
there's a feeling i get when i look to the west, & my spirit is crying for leaving.
"You're all I need." The Alchemist replied almost instinctively, but it wasn't just a reflex. Not just some meaningless platitude to repeat over and over. It was true in a way that seemed to demand reciting. Glancing up at Ronin's nudge, Remi slouched appreciatively and nodded. "Creation...I think that's all I'll actually miss. Moving about water and earth and the rest of it.." He shrugged, pursing his bottom lip slightly. "But to make things in a way I couldn't with my own hands...That's something I'll miss quite a lot." Then, with a cheeky smile, he raised a brow as he looked up at Ronin. "It means no more pants dissolving into rose petals. And you'll be bartering for your own clothes now."
Feeling Ronin pull away and letting him, Remi gazed out into the darkness as well. "No, but he did say to find him. I've already noticed...other changes. Best I try and sort through those before seeking it out again." And, because he knew Ronin would ask, Remi pulled away and stood in the moonlight. Shifting to the left just a bit, he met Ronin's eyes and then focused on remaining completely still. As he did, the shadows around him seemed to thicken, blocking out the outline of his body and filing down the details until he was naught but a shadow himself.
in my thoughts I have seen rings of smoke through the trees & the voices of those who stand looking.
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
"Me? Husband of the Governor, bartering for his own clothes?" Ronin pretended to sound utterly outraged. "I don't think I can support this any longer, Remi. There's only so much a man can be expected to take." Grinning, he brushed his thumb across the Alchemist's cheek. "I can understand missing it. But it's been a very long time since you made anything just with your hands, so maybe it will be nice to get back to that." It paled in comparison to what he had lost, but it was something at least.
Remi got to his feet and Ronin tracked him with his eyes, tilting his head as he watched him grow still in the moonlight. As he began to fade into the shadows, the hunter snorted. "People will call you a demi god, you know," he said. "Sorry, I just can't help but find it funny how I radiate light and you become shadows. We have become a trope, Remi." He beamed.
there's a feeling i get when i look to the west, & my spirit is crying for leaving.
Remi grinned at that, pleased as ever that their lighthearted banter couldn't be chased away by a bit of soul-bartering and murder. "These are tough times, but somehow we'll pull through." He said solemnly, before grinning up at his husband, a hand shifting to Ronin's knee. "Oh, my hands still know how to make a few things." Remi said, unable to hide the boyish spark of mischief in his eyes.
As soon as Remi spoke, the magic seemed to shatter and the Alchemist wavered back into view. "Well, I can't stop them from that." To hear Ronin lay out their respective abilities like that made Remi curl his lip up in dissatisfaction. "You just had to point that out, didn't you." He grumbled, wandering back towards Ronin looking properly displeased at the prospect of their lives having taken on this predictability. "You're not wrong. Perhaps one day we shall have to join forces to save the world, mm?"
in my thoughts I have seen rings of smoke through the trees & the voices of those who stand looking.
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
"You don't need to tell me that - I know it well," Ronin fired back with a filthy smile, watching his husband flicker back to life as he spoke and the shadows around him seemed to disperse. He let out a laugh that was definitely more of a cackle as the other man showed such displeasure about their abilities, and of course that only made him glow with starlight even more. Rising to his feet and stepping down to meet Remi, he slipped his arms around the Alchemist and drew him close.
"Oh but it's so dramatic," he said with an exaggerated swoon. "Star-crossed lovers, you might call us. Bonded together to save Caido from an evil as of yet unheard of!" Ronin winked. "Either that or we can just fuck around like usual."
