sipping silly chartreuse champagne

Oliver

A break was... not exactly what Oliver deserved but fuck did he need it. Yeah, there was a bar back at home, but that gets boring over time. Yes, he also had alcohol at home... but he was also craving genuine human interaction, in a way. Part of him missed the spontineaty of walking into a bar and seeing someone, before freaking out over a wine spider. Such a silly thing to miss, but eh. He's in a strange mood today.

It had been an eventful day. It started out with him gathering up materials on the coast, heading out at morning when the tide started to reveal away treasures brought in during the night. Trinkets were left alone, rather, he was looking for anything that may potentially be used for LongNight or things for himself. A few metals things were added to his sling bag, but otherwise nothing great. It was followed up by some trading. It took a bit... okay, A LOT of talking with people but eventually someone wanted some nails! It felt great and Oliver was pretty damn satisfied with himself, making away with two blankets as well quite a lot of jerky, all from his farm. Satisfied, Oliver made a trip back to the manor, depositing everything he had found before heading back out. More simply work was done around the Hollowed Ground and Torchline, stuff that was... far too boring to mention.

All that matters is that it ended up with him at the bar in Torchline. Nestled in along the bar, Oliver had two glasses in front of him, one filled with wine and another filled with water. At this time, he was taking a sip of the water, allowing his shoulders to relax and himself to simply enjoy the evening.

---

Remi

My heart beating, my soul breathing,
I found my life when I laid it down,
Upward falling, spirit soaring

remi Took a fall from a windy height, I only knew how to hold on tight & pray for love enough to last all night One of the few places that being the Governor hardly mattered, was the Hanged Man. Here, Raza still reigned supreme, and Remi was all too happy to let her wear that crown. He was finding ruling every bit as arduous as Ronin had warned him it would be, but still he pushed through, easily finding reasons why it was worth it. Swinging open the doors and waving half-heartedly at Raza and her staff, the Alchemist glanced around to see if there were any friendly (or more specifically, unfriendly faces loren to take care of). Almost instantly Remi's pale stare fell upon Oliver, who at this moment fell into neither camp, which of course was just as bad. Sighing and running his fingers up the back of his neck and through his curls, he made his way over towards the man's table. "This seat taken?" Remi asked in a voice that hinted at an oncoming apology should Oliver allow him to sit.

Oliver

The sound of the door opening would've once caused Oliver to turn around, eager to see who had entered, but far too much had changed. Being so eager was dangerous, especially in a place like Torchline. It showed a vulnerability and Oliver was far stronger than that. As well, he just didn't feel inclined to do such a thing anymore. Sure, if someone wanted to talk he'd be happy to, but to just stare down every single person who entered the bar? No. And lastly, his back kinda hurt and he wasn't in the mood to strain it anymore.

So safe to say, when he heard that familiar voice right next to him, he was extremely surprised. Looking up at Remi, Oliver could only hope his surprise wasn't obvious, or if it was that it masked any worry or frustration. His feelings towards Remi were... complicated.

Nodding, Oliver gestured with the glass of water ever so slightly. "Sure, go ahead and sit." Not like I can stop the Governor from doing whatever he wants. Went unsaid because Oliver wasn't exactly in the mood to end up with Sunjata for the night.

With a sip of the water Oliver set the glass down and switched straight to wine, waiting for the other man. If he wanted to speak, then fine, but last he checked Remi wasn't in the mood to hear anything he had to say.

My heart beating, my soul breathing,
I found my life when I laid it down,
Upward falling, spirit soaring

remi Took a fall from a windy height, I only knew how to hold on tight & pray for love enough to last all night Despite how kind Oliver was, had the man told him to fuck right off, he'd have accepted it in stride. It was more or less what he deserved in the big scheme of things. Though Remi would never go back to the sunny and wide-hearted man he'd once been, he'd also left behind the cold and cruel husk that Oliver had the misfortune of encountering on more than one occasion. Taking a breath, still steeling himself for some of Oliver's anger, Remi pulled out the chair and took a seat. "Before you say anything, I owe you an apology. I—" One of the waiters brought over a glass filled with something dark—Remi's 'usual'—and the Alchemist abruptly stopped to offer them a nod of thanks. Pulling the glass towards himself with one hand and letting his fingers trace around the top, he continued. "I was a real asshole to you, and I'm sorry for that. You caught me at one hell of a time in my life when I wasn't handling things well at all." Raising his eyes to give Oliver an earnest stare, Remi frowned as he shook his head, exhaling a long and steady stream of air. "That...part of my life, or at least how I was dealing with it, is over and done now." He added softly, knowing better than most that you couldn't take back the past.

Oliver

The first words to leave Remi's mouth were quite... annoying. Assuming automatically that Oliver wanted to say something? No. Why the fuck would he have anything to say? But then, rather than allowing the anger to show through, his face morphed slowly as Remi continued speaking. His words were immediately different, tone unique. It wasn't anything like the last time Oliver heard him... and that's not even the most surprising part. He was getting an apology.

Watching with wide eyes, Oliver's full attention was on Remi, the glass still clutched within his hand. A waiter left a momentary pause, but soon Remi was speaking once more. As Remi continued to speak, thoughts swirled in his head. Part of him wanted to forget it, shove away any negative feelings Oliver had suffered from their interactions and immediately accept the apology... but what the fuck. Remi had hurt him. Yeah, he had probably overreacted. It was embarrassing and probably just an almost repeat of what happened with Amun, but in this case it was friendship. Were he and Remi ever actually friends? Or ever actually close? Was everything just a fabrication within his own mind, twisting simple kindness into genuine feelings of care?

Once Remi had finished speaking, there was a pause. Attempting to buy himself some time, Oliver took a sip of the wine, his hand ever so slightly shaky. The glass was placed down carefully and he turned his head to face him once more. "I'm not going to be nice about this... but fuck Remi, your words really fucking hurt." There were so many thoughts. Two major things popped into his head, competing to be said first. Polar opposite. One was almost targeting Remi, potentially to light the blaze within his heart even more... but the other out of actual care. "What changed?" His voice was soft, hoping that Remi would be honest. Now was the time to try and forgive, not to attack Remi and allow his frustration to morph into hatred.

My heart beating, my soul breathing,
I found my life when I laid it down,
Upward falling, spirit soaring

remi Took a fall from a windy height, I only knew how to hold on tight & pray for love enough to last all night Remi almost chuckled a touch at that. Oliver's version of not being nice was about as sharp as Remi's own had once been. From all that the Alchemist had seen, the man across from him didn't have it in him to be as devastatingly mean as others did. Oliver was still golden and good in a way that Remi wasn't anymore, and he was almost sad to feel so little venom coming from the other man. "I did." Remi replied, indeed offering up the sort of honestly Oliver wanted. Taking a deep breath and letting it out, the Alchemist shrugged his shoulders before relaxing somewhat. "You know...some of what happened, with Ronin and Aoife and whatnot. There's more, but it doesn't really matter. The point is, I carried all of it around with me to the point where it had started to ... blacken my soul. That's what Ludo said, anyways." Reaching for his glass, Remi raised it to his lips and took a long drink before setting it back down lightly on the table. "It...cleansed me, you might say. This time it didn't remove my memories, but instead simply made me face up to them. It also...stripped away a lot of things I had come to rely on." Which was to say almost all of his magic and the majority of his animal shifts. "And after it was done? The anger was mostly gone too."

Oliver

It took a lot to truly make the blonde explode in a fit of rage. Right now, he couldn't find the right words to explain how he felt. To put meaning to his feelings towards Remi. Part of him still felt like it would be seen as childish, both how he felt and what he wanted to say exactly. It left him with keeping things short, simple, and light.

Once the story began, Oliver remained quiet, choosing to allow Remi to fully speak. It would not only be rude to interrupt, but it may also lead to multiple misunderstandings. So he waited, sipping on his wine and allowing the alcohol to take hold of his system and hopefully help him through this. The term 'blackened soul' seemed fitting. Remi was dark, angry. Devoid of joy and life... or at least around Oliver. Then Ludo cleansed him. Oliver wasn't sure what that meant entirely, but from what Remi hinted at... he was changed.

Now it was his turn to speak and he had a fury of words thrown at his head. So many things he wanted to say, ask. Accuse Remi or try and be nice. Forgive him immediately and just get on with life again. He couldn't ignore his feelings... but would it be too forward to ask some of the things taunting him? "How- how do you feel differently now? Did you treat other people like how you treated me?" Or was I just unfortunate enough to feel your wrath. Most importantly... Oliver wanted to know how Remi viewed him now. To know if Remi still felt those harsh words once said to him.

My heart beating, my soul breathing,
I found my life when I laid it down,
Upward falling, spirit soaring

remi Took a fall from a windy height, I only knew how to hold on tight & pray for love enough to last all night "I feel...detached from my anger, I suppose." The Alchemist replied. Though as Oliver rather bitterly continued on, Remi paused and offered the up and coming creator a curious stare. "If by that you mean, did I tell other people I weren't interested in their thoughts about my situation or the things happening in their lives, then yes." He said rather casually. "My daughter had been killed in my arms by a man who I had once been hopelessly in love with, I'd been deposited in a foreign place with my husband and her dead body, and it nearly tore Ronin and I apart. So if you're asking if I was equally as callous to others who wanted to talk to me about rocks or ask what I'd been up to, then undoubtedly the answer is yes."

Oliver

At first, Oliver was gradually beginning to feel slightly better. Remi had apologized, so surely he felt bad... right? And it wasn't like Remi just hated him selectively- so maybe things were improving. Getting better... but then he went on and Oliver felt bad. He had possibly said too much, but this is what happens. Oliver understood exactly why Remi would be mad, but that didn't mean that he wasn't frustrated and hurt. It was a hard thing to feel and at this point, he felt like he should at least say something.

Finishing off both glasses, Oliver set them down and stared at the counter, tempted to just ask for more so he could drink himself into oblivion. "I do understand why you felt the way you did, trust me.... I'm sorry that it might've come off as me being insensitive or like I still don't understand why you felt the way you did." Here he was, apologizing and feel bad for having any sort of anger towards Remi. It was far from healthy, but Oliver didn't want to make Remi mad. He didn't want to deal with a fight and if preventing that meant taking the entire blame? Then fine. "I won't lie, I was hurt. I don't know how to feel anymore Remi. I still care about you, so much... but even when I care, I cant help but feel so much anger." It was probably too much to say, but if he had to explain his emotions then fine. Fine. They weren't important, far from it, and many people scoffed at them when he was open with how he felt. It's embarrassing and pitiful.

Finally looking back at Remi, he let out a soft sigh. "What do you want from this? From us? What do you want our relationship to be?" Friends was... probably never going to happen again and it hurt a fuck ton. Oliver just wanted to know what exactly Remi wanted, because he was fully in charge at this point, Oliver merely just being dragged along by a chain. He was fully at the will of the Governor and had no say, not anymore at least.

My heart beating, my soul breathing,
I found my life when I laid it down,
Upward falling, spirit soaring

remi Took a fall from a windy height, I only knew how to hold on tight & pray for love enough to last all night Remi raised a brow at that, but kept silent. As it was, he didn't actually think Oliver understood at all why he'd been so short-tempered and cruel to him. If he had, he wouldn't have asked the sorts of questions he was. But this was about making amends, not defending past behaviour and so the alchemist merely hummed a note under his breath. "You're allowed to be angry, Oliver." The Alchemist pointed out softly. "If I've learned one thing, you can't just fix your emotions simply because you want to. It takes time." Had Remi access to Oliver's thoughts, he'd be extremely troubled by them. But with the loss of his attuned abilities, he hadn't any sort of sense what the other man was thinking, save for the way he had quickly downed both of his drinks. "I...am not sure. The list of friends I have now is just Ronin." Remi added with a bit of a sigh. "After everything that has happened I'm not sure I have the capacity to be the sort of friend you might want me to be."

Oliver

His words echoed in his head and Oliver shook his head, staring off and hoping that a waiter would see him and fill up his glasses- grant him an item to be used as a distraction. Oliver had no excuse for how long it took him to answer, not with his empty glasses. "I don't know if I'm angry... It's not like I feel hatred, trust me. I don't hate you Remi." Was angry even the right term? "I feel, frustrated. Both with the fact that I cant even fucking word what I want to say properly, but also just- fuck." He could even say it straight right now. Fucking hell.

Oliver wasn't a malicious person or at least he hoped he wasn't one. It hurt to hear that Remi thought his only friend was Ronin. Surely, Remi had plenty more people to call a friend. There were people Oliver knew for sure were Remi's enemies, but aside from that... could he think of anyone? Nobody goes around saying who they are friends with so he truly cant mention anyone. The next part is the one Oliver chooses to focus on instead. "What friend do you think I want you to be at this point?" It was a loaded question and Oliver only hoped Remi could be honest with him and hopefully, maybe, they could clear up some misunderstandings.

My heart beating, my soul breathing,
I found my life when I laid it down,
Upward falling, spirit soaring

remi Took a fall from a windy height, I only knew how to hold on tight & pray for love enough to last all night Through a slight veil of curls, the Alchemist looked across the table with patient sea-glass eyes as Oliver wound himself around the thing he apparently wanted to say. Far past the days of supplying meaning for others, Remi had no choice but to let Oliver flail in his lexical struggles. Exhaling the breath he'd been holding, Remi leaned back in his chair. Running a hand through his curls to brush them out of his face, he gave Oliver a long and thoughtful stare before answering. "Well...the sort that comes when you need them. The sort that can put them first." He answered, his voice even and smooth. But the man across the table, the man with scars across his throat, with eyes hardly ever filled with laughter, and with a heart only large enough for one, he couldn't be the sort of man he was roughly describing. Not anymore.

Oliver

It was hard to find the words and even when he spoke, he lacked confidence. He was angry with himself now, frustrated that he couldn't even speak properly when it was so dire to do so. "I feel like I should be mad at you and I am... but I still care. And it's a frustrating mess." It's a sharp contrast to the old Oliver. He isn't rambling, not as much at least. The words on his mind are said and that's it, no long winding explanations. He hopes that it's enough, even though it feels like he hasn't explained his emotions exactly.

While that's what Oliver originally wanted from Remi, he had learned it was too much to expect. Yes, he'd love a friend who was there for him, who actually cared and would be sad if something bad were to happen... but that felt like too much to ask of Remi. Right now, he was fine with finding a middle ground, hoping that they could try and salvage something. "Honestly? I don't want that, not anymore." He shook his head. Yes, he did crave such a relationship, but from Remi? Absolutely not. Why ask someone to care about you when you know they may not give a single shit anymore? "I honestly just want someone I can, I don't know, do something with. Be important. Get a drink with, do some training, and I don't fucking know. Just live a normal life. You don't have to care about me, Remi." And that's when he chose to stop speaking, realizing he was rambling and saying far too much once again.Maybe it'd do him some good to get cursed into not speaking again, it could fix a lot of shit wrong with him that's for sure.

My heart beating, my soul breathing,
I found my life when I laid it down,
Upward falling, spirit soaring

remi Took a fall from a windy height, I only knew how to hold on tight & pray for love enough to last all night Tilting his head to the side as Oliver explains he both is and isn't angry with the Alchemist, that he still cares, Remi just nods a touch sadly. "Be important?" The Alchemist repeats, trying to keep the skepticism he feels from turning his voice unkind. "Of course I'll do things with you Oliver. Train, drink—" Remi holds up his glass as if to indicate that they are doing just that. "—but I don't get the sense that's actually what you want. Not something you'd be happy with, anyways." Drumming his fingers on the table, Remi shifts in his seat. "What I am now...what Ludo has asked me to be...it doesn't leave a lot of room for friendship."