just a hole where my heart used to be

Breathing a sigh of relief that he'd managed to prevent another tragedy, Loren sent a pulse of warmth and comfort towards Korbin. Not even acknowledging Kiada's departure, the healer just hugged the Hale tightly. "No, I can't. I meant what I said, that I wouldn't stop." The words came out quietly.

Using their hopefully linked bodies, Loren would send some healing magic towards the other man's neck to take care of whatever damage had been done. Not moving from his position, the healer felt Astra pressing herself against both their legs, offering what support she could. "Come on. Let's get out of here." He tossed the knife aside with his magic, uncaring where it fell so long as it was away from Korbin.

you are lost, hope is gone

but you must go on

Loren

Base Code by Sky!

Lonely shadows following me
Lonely ghosts come a-calling

He had expected Loren to be angry. Waited for reproachful words, scoldings and ultimatums. Not this. Not comfort and a hug. Korbin was so taken aback by it that he didn't even withdraw. He just stood there and let himself be held, confused and a bit awkward. Not sure what to do with his hands.

"You're going to get hurt if you keep this up," he warned. "Not everyone can be saved."

The breath of magic ghosting through him did not go unnoticed, and it was still unwelcome. Reaching up around Loren's shoulder, Korbin touched a finger to his neck. It came away bloody, but of the wound only a thin white line remained. "What happened to asking permission before healing people?" he grumbled... but it was subdued. There was no shielding himself from this kind of directness. Did Loren realize that? Was that why he did it?

Korbin gazed long after the knife, to the lonely corner it landed in. It had been Weaver's. Only a small thing, but aside from the Kraai it was all that was left of her.

But maybe it was best to leave it here. Among the rest of the ashes.  

"And go where? I'm not going to the Kraai." Still couldn't stomach it. And there was no other place. The Academy was full, the Palace ruined, the lodges crowded... There was no place for him left here. Korbin had made sure of that when he set fire to the house.

Thousand voices dead at my feet
Now I'm gone, now I'm gone, now I'm gone

Letting out a huff of unexpected laughter, Loren's arms just tightened around Korbin. "You don't get to decide who or what I care about." The words came out quietly, a gentle chiding.

Pulling away slightly, the healer met the Hale's gaze squarely. "I used my discretion, as is my right as a healer." Loren's tone was firm, and his expression serious.

When the other man asked where they would go, the healer shifted so he was slinging an arm over Korbin's shoulder. It was awkward, given their height differential, but Loren managed. "Come on." Using their contact, he began steering the Hale down the street. The healer's phoenix was still circling overhead, keeping the cold at bay as best it could.

you are lost, hope is gone

but you must go on

Loren

Base Code by Sky!

Lonely shadows following me
Lonely ghosts come a-calling

It really was unexpected, and Korbin had to glance down at the other man, puzzled at the sudden amusement. The words Loren offered was an echo of something he'd said before, the first time Korbin had warned about caring too much. It felt like a lifetime ago.

"Fine," the boy mumbled, relenting under the serious look. He couldn't hold the Healer's gaze for very long before it dropped and veered off, to Astra by their legs, brows knitted with tension. The guilt churned within, a sickening weight in his gut that made his knees weak. Or maybe that was just hunger. Korbin started to twist in the grip, to withdraw, but Loren preceded him and let go - well, almost. He wanted to shrink away from that guiding arm too... But he didn't. Couldn't bring himself to. It was weak and it was pathetic, but Loren's simple, stubborn refusal to leave him alone stirred something within. Korbin had no name for it, but it was a different kind of pain. Not quite the same as the rest.

Clearly Loren wasn't going to answer his question, so Korbin had no choice but to follow along blindly. Blue eyes kept darting towards buildings, trying to guess at the destination. He really had no idea though, and soon gave up.

"How did you find me?" he asked instead, in quiet tones. It had been quite the close call...

Thousand voices dead at my feet
Now I'm gone, now I'm gone, now I'm gone

Korbin didn't fight Loren as he led the Hale through the streets. Their destination wasn't far: eventually, they turned a corner and found an igloo where there was a bit of space between two houses. It wasn't the prettiest structure, but as the healer ducked into the opening, releasing the other man, Loren sighed in relief.

Dismissing the phoenix, he would gather furs and hand them to Korbin (assuming the other man had followed the healer). "Small town. People talk." Fishing around in a bag in the corner, Loren pulled out some jerky in one hand and some hay in the other.

He held the jerky out for the Hale and the hay out for Astra. The luxere munched on it happily. As she did, the healer regarded the other man steadily. "Eat." It wasn't an offer.

you are lost, hope is gone

but you must go on

Loren

Base Code by Sky!

Lonely shadows following me
Lonely ghosts come a-calling

The igloo was... unexpected. Korbin hesitated outside even as Loren ducked inside, eying the construction with suspicion. It was part of everyday survival on the Tundra to build these things, but... a poorly made one might collapse and become a deadly trap. It probably shouldn't bother him considering what he had just tried to do to himself, though.

He had to duck quite a lot to get inside, but once within the structure, the air grew noticeably warmer. Korbin gazed about, puzzled and rather confused about the existence of this thing. How had he never noticed it?

Returning his attention to Loren when he was handed furs, the boy spread one on the ground and sat down, and draped another over himself. When the jerky was offered however, he shook his head. It felt too much like a treat offered to a second pet, the way it was doled out. One for the luxere, one for the raven.

Maybe that's what this was about. Some project to tame a wild beast. Teach it to sit, stay and roll over. How to be a good dog.

"Not hungry," Korbin lied quietly, as he pulled the knees up to his chest and wrapped arms about them. Resting his chin on an arm, his eyes kept moving around the igloo, tension palpable in the air about him. "What is this place?"

Thousand voices dead at my feet
Now I'm gone, now I'm gone, now I'm gone

As Korbin refused the jerky, Loren's eyes narrowed. "I'm sure. Eat anyway." His voice was quiet, but firm. Astra raised her head to stare at the Hale reproachfully as the healer met the other man's gaze squarely.

Glancing around at the interior of the igloo, Loren shrugged. "It's an igloo." Shaking his head slightly, he sighed. "I built it. I didn't have anywhere else to stay so I figured I'd just build something." Much more quietly he added, "Wouldn't be the first time."

Shaking his head slightly, he pulled his knees into his chest. It wasn't particularly spacious inside the structure, and considering how tall the two of them were, they took up most of the available room. Falling silent, he just stared blankly ahead.

you are lost, hope is gone

but you must go on

Loren

Base Code by Sky!

Lonely shadows following me
Lonely ghosts come a-calling

It turned into a threeway staring contest. Astra's dewey eyes had less effect than Loren's determined gaze, but in the end Korbin relented enough to at least take the offered meat. He bit off a small piece, just to shut the healer up, but though he chewed the food just grew in his mouth. It took everything he had to swallow down that small piece, and after that Korbin just turned the jerky between his fingers. Listened to Loren's explanation without comment, and to the silence that followed until it grew oppressive.

He had no words of comfort for the man. Even if he somewhere recognized that it should be as rough on Loren as it was on him, Korbin couldn't bring himself to care. Even gave it a try, attempted to summon any emotion at all - anger, pity, contempt even - but all he had was numbness. Cold ashes.

As the silence dragged out, his breaths came quicker, grew shallow and agitated. He twisted were he sat, tried to make himself comfortable but failed.

Eventually Korbin shrugged off the furs and started to get up. "I can't stay here," he mumbled, sounding choked, half panicked.

He wouldn't listen to any consolations, or let himself be trapped inside. As soon as he got a chance, he shifted into the raven and darted off, leaving Loren behind. Another thing to feel guilty about.

---------

- Fin

Thousand voices dead at my feet
Now I'm gone, now I'm gone, now I'm gone